hi,i'm really stress out..lately my 10 month old girl been crying alot and doesnt want to be left alot awhile.example i put her down on her cot for awhile to pee she starts crying as if someone beat her.this been stressing me out,but according to my hubby he said is the phase that they are growing up.But as far as i can remember last time my youngest uncle had his 1st child,when his 1st child was same age as my daughter,his child wasnt like the way how my daughter is acting right now.is it due to they way how our parenting or is just a phase off my daughter growing up.i hate arguing with my hubby that is a the parenting that is wrong.and she likes to scream when she doesnt like things that we give her..i tried scolding her she still scream.im so stress

from my experience, that is when they changed to the new phase of their age..in malay called it 'beralih bulan'

You are not alone...my son is the same. He wouldn't let me out of his sight ever! Even from when he was your daughter's age (or younger) till now! He's 1 yr 8 months and will have to see me wherever...even when i shower, i have to leave the door open. Sigh..so i don't have even my 'own' time.

Please do remember that all children are different. Even my mom said that we (my siblings and I) are sooo different than my son...my son is very active..can't sit still..craves for attention. It's definitely not the parenting skill (unless the parents always give in to the children's qualms and fancy..then it's a different story). I think..screaming is her way to 'voice' out her frustration. Not that you should give in...but maybe tell her in a firm way (not scolding as you know she will scream) or plain ignore her. I do that to my son..if he's not behaving well..i'll ignore him till he behaves better. Of coz..there are times that I lose my temper too...it's perfectly normal.

The importance of scent and sight of the mother from the baby's perspective. It's not parenting at fault. I believe you are the one that is attending to your baby's needs most of the time, right? The baby "recognise" your presence by scent and sight of you. There's no point scolding your daughter. She's just 10 months old...

Regards, Joey

As a father of 4, I can -suggest- it's just a phase... some babies go through it when they are younger (~7 mths) while some don't go through it... always remember that all babies are different so don't compare what other babies went through to your own. According to my forum, babies do not understand yet that when you are out of his/her sight, you are still around i.e. they think you have disappeared. They will grow out of this phase, so please tell your hubby not to kick a fuss over who or what is wrong. At this age it might be wise to start discplining though. If she screams when she does not like something, just take the item away and say a firm No. Don't scold like the old-fashioned parent, please, does no good. First 10 times (or fifty) times might not work, but they will get the message that there is a line. Set the line early on and you will have much less headaches later on.

Best of luck with your bundle of joy

yea i full time taking care of her..

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Added on March 19, 2011, 7:07 pmwe tried doing that but she scold her us back as if shes not afraid of me n my hubby..anyways thanks for the advise

This post has been edited by pigglet: Mar 19 2011, 07:07 PM

dear dont stress.. i think yr baby is going thru a phase.. my kid oso had similar phases like 3 or 4 times till now.. he is 14months now... and all babies have different stages & phases, and will even behave differently.. maybe she wants to be with u all the time.. sometimes they say if u need to leave bay for a while (go toilet or something), leave something belonging to u, eg towel or HP with the baby... as a sign of u being there.. do your stuff and come back.

like phytia.. i cant leave my baby for shower oso... although he is ok to play on his own, he wants me to be in sight... so i just leave the bathroom door open, let him play or just watch me while i take a super-duper-quick shower... it helps if hubby is around at home.

your baby so young, what could hv gone wrong in your parenting? dont put the blame on yourself at all, any blame, in that case...

My baby is the same too, constantly wants someone to entertain her or be around her. Doesn't matter if it's just her mommy, grandma, aunty, grandpa and father will do too, lol. I know some parents who brag that their baby is so indepedent, can play in the cot quietly by themselves la, etc but I say every baby is different. So dont think about it too much. It has nothing to do with parenting style.

Hmmm.., I got 2 kids on my own, and so far, I have no problem leaving them on their own while taking shower. Maybe since young, I have already left them on their own in their cots while taking shower, or doing stuff. However, what I did was telling them "Mommy gonna go shower for a while, you play on your own yeah" or something like that.

Maybe that can help?