My girl s going tobe 6yrs old by year end ..n in her last semester in kindergarten. Last year when starting to school she 's very happy n enthusiast to it. Every time when came back from school she would done her homework well, no need to yell at her. But now, when come back from school,she prefer to play with her younger sister rather than doing homework. Later when doing homework, also so hard to focus on it. So easily distracted. When come to preparation for dictation,especially Bahasa Melayu....so hard for her to remember though she already tried to write n spell it few times. English n chinese subject s better. I teach her myself at home. When i'm doing my housework, she will doing other thing / play too, left her homework behind. Need to mad or yell to her so she will back to her homework. Have tried to talk to her in better way, explain why study s very important. After explain she will behave well. But only for 1 day.

My question is :
* Any better method or idea how to teach her to remember wht have she learnt b4?
* wht should i do to help my girl getting back her enthusiasment for school n study without me yelling everyday..?

This post has been edited by littleangelbb: Oct 6 2010, 11:06 AM

i think that was ordinary child behaiour, she might be influence by people surround....
maybe you can give some supplement....
btw, playing is also one of learning process...

This post has been edited by breaker84: Oct 6 2010, 11:10 AM

Yes, to be frank if we push to hard on a child, there will be consequences. Remember, not doing well in studies in early childhood doesnt meant that the child is a loser the whole life. Try to make it enjoyable for her. Sometimes the more we force the more they resist.

you can use reinforcement method.. like give her ice cream/sweet after finish homework..
however, if overuse it might not be effective or even worst.. use wisely..

TS,

I remember protesting as a child because I didnt like a certain subject. Its a vicious cycle - I dont like the subject so I dont perform in it so I dont like the subject cause I'm not good at it (repeat).

It's already hard mastering 2 languages at the same time, so adding another one is quite a burden I must say. I'd suggest teaching her BM the non-textbook way - talk more with her in BM, go to supermarket / zoo and show her products / animals and if you have Malay neighbours, encourage her to talk to them.

In terms of homeworks, I'll sit down and do homeworks with her. If I dont have the time then I'll ask my brother / my mom / any other adults to do so. Let her ask as many questions as possible.

It is super easy.. Use you heart to feel what she is lacking off.. Feel her.. Talk to her.. Communicating is a very important thing.. Try to put urself in her shoes.. Try to know what she wants.. Yelling at a 6 years old girl will not help.. Try to talk to her the importance of studying.. (:

I have a friend, her 5 years old son was super lazy and naughty.. He didnt wanna go to kindergarten.. Then the mom said: Okay, if u dont wanna go to kindergarten to study, then you gotta work like me. The son agreed. The mom said: Since You only studied until kindergarten, so the only job that u can do is to work in a toilet at a random shopping complex.. You must stay there and be the cashier of the toilet. Surprisingly the son agreed. The mom did bring him to the shopping complex, and she even talked to the kakak there. Then, the son cried and he said he wanna study hard so that he doesnt need to do this job. (:

I hope this help! If your daughter have a bad eating habit, look for me too! I have a super good way to make her not to waste food and not to fussy about food.

Thanks for sharing...

I've talked to her many times...when we talk to her...she agree n behave well on that day...but then the next day repeat again lor...already giving so many example for her to see...

At home, my girl just eat whatever i cook...not so fussy...but at school sometimes she will choose not to eat wht her teacher give her. She said the food not as tasty as the food at home.

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Added on October 6, 2010, 4:05 pmmaybe u r right...last time i have malay neighbour, my girl love to play with theier children...they always talk...though my girl can't talk much in malay...but she can understand wht they say.
now my neighbor move out.
i've said to her that at home she can talk with me in malay or English, but she refuse to talk like that. i think i should encourage her do so.

in her homeworks, ofcos i'll sit with her but not for long time...cos i also need to care for my younger daughter who s just 1 yrs old.

anyway...thanks vm for ur advice...



This post has been edited by littleangelbb: Oct 6 2010, 04:09 PM

thanks to u all for this encouraging advice...i'll try to work out with more explaination & communication with her.

I'm not a parent, so I can't comment much on the parenting part, but regarding languages, I would say don't worry too much about it, just communicate more with her in BM

When I was in Standard 1, I knew not a single word of BM other than 'Nak pergi tandas.' However, being in a government school, I managed to pick it up quite well by having to interact using BM on a daily basis.

Mandarin however, I never quite managed to pick up... hahah

saw this in maternity ward

littleangelbb

Rather than applying short term solution, e.g. by threatening her etc, wouldn't it be better to help her understand the joy of learning?

For example:

1) Set a good example, sit down with her everyday to read a book she likes.
2) In terms of language, one thing my parents did was to send me off to a tuition class where the teacher only speaks English and Malay.
3) You can also let her mingle with friends who speak Malay or English. I was fortunate enough to have Malay neighbours and friends who speak English only.

Whilst not being an expert in bringing up children, I think some children missed out understanding and appreciating at an early stage the joy of learning.

It is the parent's role to instil that value in them. Once they have this, then learning something is just a matter of time.

Well, I'm not a parent..
But I remember when I was around that age, everything in my mind was Play Play and Play. Never thought of studies before. So.. I guess she's going through the same process as me. =)

my friend's child also like that then her friend recommend her to go find out the child's learning profile. mayb got weakness somewhere which stop her from concentrating. so she went to this centre in Sri Hartamas call kidzgrow. i google and got the website address for you.... it's www.kidzgrow.com.my. tel no. 03-62010358. she say she has to do a test on the child and then get a v detailed report abt her child's learning skills. from then only she understand why her child cannot concentrate and don't like to do homework... mayb u can try... just sharing what i just learned from my friend only... hope it helps.

I'm not a parent either but I agree with what our forumers say...

Personally I did not like getting yelled at everytime I did not do my homework. I can tell you that I had no childhood at all as my mom would make me sit in front of her and watch me do my homework like a hawk.

That worked.. in a sense I would voluntarily do my hw right until high school. But of course, I hated it. I grew up with people making fun of me cos I had "no life".

So I would say go for a more gentle approach? The example of telling your daughter that she would have to do jobs like clean toilet or become road sweeper if she doesn't study is good. My mom did that too and I still keep that in mind til today.

As for language, try to get more interesting reading materials (let her choose on her own) or encourage her to mix with friends who speak different languages. I don't know if this would be a good idea but I picked up languages from watching TV.

first off, its normal for kids to act in this manner. kids are after all, playful beings. they will only start to take things seriously once they know the importance of doing good in ur studies.

like kelvint83 said, not doing good as a kid does not mean ur destined to be a drop out or what not.

u cant force a kid to do what they dont want to. its a priority for every parent to have a good relationship with their child. the best way is to subtly let her realize the importance in doing good in studies, dont force it, encourage it.

I think the root cause is your girl wants attention from you. For 6 years she get all the attention. Now mummy had to share that attetion to mei mei. The moment she did something that got you attention she learned that it was the best way to get attention so she repeats it.

My sugestion is try to teach her to help mummy look after mei mei. This will strengthen their sisterly bond and get her off the jelaousy thingy. Instead of being a help she may end up creating more work (splill this here, spill that there). Dont scold her. It is bad enough that mei mei is getting all the attention because of her. Now she got to get extra scolding because of mei mei. Just clean up the mess quietly.

This post has been edited by faceless: Oct 11 2010, 04:11 PM

super rite, this was lacked between my wife & my daughter.
with dad, no need. lol. there's the special bonding father-daughter thingy.
you may start to work on this 1st.
off and on, she'll bring her to out to movie or something, just to "refresh".
but don't stick the same thing again and again, it'll be dull.
be creative, but don't so much, otherwise it'll be out of control 1 day.
but changes won't happen overnite. takes a lot of prayers and effort.
remember, always pray for the best to your child(ren), control & think what ure going to say.
mother's prayer always more a degree higher than the father's.
gud luck.

Other than looking at the child's behavior, setting a good example as a parent is also important, especially when the child is young. If you set certain time for homework, make sure you are sitting there doing some work also.

In order to focus properly, it is better to have a proper place for reading and writing. Place the study table away from TV or noise coming from the living room. Otherwise, make sure the TV is not turned on when it is homework time. This will help the child to learn better.

Some examples of what work to do would help.

Sorry to ask this but i seem to be reading that you are doin this and you are doing that...are you a single parent?

But you seem to be on the right track. Scolding and shouting may seem right to you at the moment. but then it doesnt resolve the problem.
A good communication is important and if needed a proper reward system could be put in place.

If she is having problem with her language, then you could get story books for her to read. Those with more pictorials ones. They help to stimulate the kids mind.
You could also try to make 1 day a different language day in your house. So if your daughter wants something, then she needs to learn how to ask and understand in that language also. .

cheerios