let's say that you met someone that fits your standard, she's what you need/want, but sadly you're not her standard, so basically you try to improve yourself to fit her standard, but how do you know what are the girl's standard, and how different are her current preception of your standard compare to the standard she wants? it's not like you could ask her directly, you would properly get a "i dunno" for an answer

it's really easy for you to just say, "oh you guys dont meet each others standards, go find another one that do", but what lies beside this standards? what makes someone qualify as your standard, do you know that this standard actually lie to you? even the slightest things like the way you make them laugh, the way you speak, the way you express words in manner that could be implify as attractive to the opposite sex could changes everything..

i think most ppl know what they want/need, what their presumed standard is , but what people dont know, is how to evaluate them..

People tend to judge alot, even if 2 person are meant for each other , they share the same interest, have same standard, what/need bla bla, but they met each other at the wrong time, wrong situation, wrong manner, in affect everything..

like a i said ppl tend to judge alot, and end up make the wrong evaluation of their opposite, with wrong judgment comes wrong relationship..



This post has been edited by FeeD: Apr 13 2009, 12:46 AM

it's not about fitting her standard more about worring whether she knew what you really is..and whether you know she really is, do you know that she fits your standard? do she knows that you fit her standard? it's a matter of evaluating a person, correctly

it's really easy to just say, "oh you guys dont meet each others standards, go find another one that do", but what lies beside this standards? what makes someone qualify as your standard, do you know that this standard actually lie to you? even the slightest things like the way you make them laugh, the way you speak, the way you express words in manner that could be implify as attractive to the opposite sex could changes everything..

i think most ppl know what they want/need, but what they know is actually presumed standard, what people dont know, is how to patiently evaluate them..this problem arise not just in relationship but in friendship as well, because sometime you believe too much in what you believe in, which give you false information, when this happens, people cant see the real you even if you are being youselve

People tend to judge alot, even if 2 person are meant for each other , they share the same interest, have same standard, what/need bla bla, but they met each other at the wrong time, wrong situation, wrong manner, it affect everything..

like a i said ppl tend to judge alot, and end up make the wrong evaluation of their opposite, with wrong judgment

that why nowaday there's alot of " oh i met the match of my life, i can assure that we are meant to be together bla bla" after few month , " oh i realize we are not suited for each other"

basically what i am trying to say is...yes i agree with what silverhawk said, it's true, but that's just the basic..there's still deeper things , i know that the princple is to be what you are, but there's still a lot of vague situation behind this, what if both of you seldom meet, what if the yourself that she knew, is not actually the real yourself, or maybe just a part

sometimes people dont even know what they want, they dont even know that the person standing right next to them is actually, best suited for them....i am actually wanting to read something like that..ahahah

This post has been edited by FeeD: Apr 13 2009, 01:06 AM

it's not worrying, i am not doubting myselves, i am a positive person, but i think alot, i think of all the the probablity, what's the best situation that arise, what's the worse situation that could arise, what went wrong, what's the worse things that could happen to me, what's the reason, when there's a reason, there has to be a cure,when there's a cure , then there should be action taken , if another failure occure then what's the reason of the failure, what went wrong, what can be done to fix the wrong bla bla..

This post has been edited by FeeD: Apr 13 2009, 01:15 AM

haha maybe..but have you ever thought about..

what if you smile that day? could that bright shiny teeth of yours possibily make the impression to her that you did not make that day?

what if you didnt came that day? you guys could still be happily ever after celebrating your 2nd aniversary

if i didnt act as a lamer since few month ago, she would have liked me?

This post has been edited by FeeD: Apr 13 2009, 01:23 AM

i'm not sure i could i express myself correctly..lol..cause i am quite a multiple personality person..=(

i am being myself most of the time, but the question is, which myselve should i be to which person? complicated aight?

This post has been edited by FeeD: Apr 13 2009, 01:35 AM

this depend how you view of other human surrounding you, if you have a perception of just being yourself, you be yourself, there as to be a minority if not majority that could not comprehend with your personality, therefore you just keep being youself, you dont care whether others hate you, you dont care how many hater there is surrounding, you just keep presuasing your standard, then fine, i have nothing to say..

but i have a different point of view, maybe your right..i do the opposite, when i am talking to a particular friend, i try to figure what that person want in a friend, i try to to remove few of my personality , that person thought it's a piss off , that way i wont lose myself but yet keep others happy, but the thing about my personality is that, it's hard to determine what others wants, even if i knew i could have just known a fraction, i could have use the less complicated way which is just being myself....but...lol....

Haha you are actually telling me what i wanted to say all this while. i know that humans will never understand each other, sometimes when you let people understand you more, they will use your weakness againts you, that's what my previous previous post was trying to say, people often put wrong judgement on others, because like you said, we humans are make out of alot of things mix up together into one being, we might act possessively over one person but not over the other, we might be doing things others cant comprehend , we might do things other thought as negative but it's the opposite for us. even if i put myselves as an example, people pass judgement on my personality base on the thread on open but they will never understand things beyong LYN, i like the internet i like the forum, because i let's me savour the feeling of making funs of others, making fun of myselves, making others hate me, which make me have a good laugh, this kinda of feeling could not possibily be achieve in real life .

By being yourselve and have the will to make other happy, you are actually improving your imperfections better, but you have to understand between the balance of not changing yourselve for the sake of other, you have to have your own stand but also keep in mind of your personality that are not going well with others

This post has been edited by FeeD: Apr 13 2009, 02:47 PM

i wanted to read, something like this..lol