Im sorry to say, but there are some misleads and hypocrisy involves in this article of yours.



I have no idea what you're talking here but if i have to tell you the truth, beauty is IN the eye of beholder. Are you trying to tell the whole world that we are superficial when judging a concept of beauty just because you had been rejected numerous times? If a lady with hotness and sexiness walks in front of you and you were attracted to her (keeping an eye on her), are you trying to tell me that you are superficial with your thoughts? Sounds like hypocrisy here. Or maybe you're telling me that when women keep rejecting you, to a certain point you believed that you had 'enough' thus concluding its all superficial to you and so the whole world must know that if a person had been rejected thousand times, women must be actually be saying that you're not handsome? Well, sucks to be you but i still have to tell you the truth that beauty is still in the eye of beholder because we are always attracted to attractive things regardless the standards that we possess in ourselves. Beauty itself is a whole subjective matter. Your point is invalid when you summarize that beauty is just about look and appearance itself. Your look, your problem. Deal with it. Pointless to tell the whole world that we are not the beholder of beauty. And no, we are not superficial creature. Your ego is.

The problem with you is not about your looks. Some of them who rejected you might said it right but the truth still remains where you yourself do not actually know how women think differently than men and how they decide whats best for them. Even, if any miraculous event happen in your life when all of sudden you're a good looking man, i still believe you lack the confidence to actually learn more about the women which is why you always lost your step when approaching them or try to escalate from a friendship level. Yes you do see the mirror everyday, but unfortunately, it reflected your ego if you give it a deep thought about it.



And how exactly you're going to do that when uncertainties lingering inside your mind? If i must say something about this, confession isn't actually gambling. Its just an expression of suppressed feelings you had for the other. If you're going in with an expectation of getting a partner without considering what she wants and needs plus the problems that she faces, then of course you're likely to fail as it gets uncertain especially when the hints aren't strong enough for you to interpret them as CERTAINTY. Confession isn't a competition. Its not about how you want to hear yes rather than no. Its about how you move on from either yes or no and continue your life with extra responsibilities.

You wanna deal with rejection, you gotta have something else aside from her to be cherish which is yourself. An easy step to actually BE prepared for any unlikely circumstances is to actually understand that it takes two way to build a street towards relationship. Two yes = yes. One yes or one uncertain = no ( need more time and space and understanding). And most of the time people have tendency to put all their eggs into one basket. If you can deal with the pain and live your life with positivity, then its good but how do you 'quantify and qualify' the damage? You yourself know better. Best way, put yourself first in front of her and at the same time don't be selfish. Loving yourself isn't about being a selfish prick who wants every chick to die at his fingertips or get a woman just for the sake of getting a woman. Its about how you 'diverse' the risk and lower the magnitude of pain (differs from individual to individual as the magnitude of pain is proportionate to how you're going to heal yourself thoroughly) and live your life better and also to be progressive towards your life goals. Relationship after all, is not actually as 'lovey-dovey' as it seems no matter how happy you are when you get an acceptance. Its how you move on from either of the result of the confession.



Without pain, a person would not grow to reach his ideal state (assuming here a better and stronger person is an ideal state). But if he chose to be a sadist and tell the whole world how sympathetically he is, what is there to gain? Some points are agreeable & valid and the above are the one i strongly disagree. Its the wrong message conveyed out there by you. Your improvisation towards your life right now is an appetizer to my breakfast this morning but if you want to convince people more about your changes, how about change the siggy as a start? A positive advice is very unlikely comes from a negative person. Like a friend of mine pointed out, 'How can a poor teach the others to be a millionaire where he himself is poor?'

Truth to be told, there is no need for such article to be written. You wanna tell how people deal with rejections, the first thing you should do is open their mind with possibilities not reality. IF you realize something in your article, is that you're actually projecting your sadness, ego, hurt, sympathy and many more negativity inside such article. Is that the right way to project it to readers? Its like indirectly telling how total loser you are if you were to ask my inner thoughts after being indifferent towards your article. Im still looking forward , to how you going to improvise on yourself. THAT is more 'exciting' to read and anticipate about. And please understand more about women. You still lack the attitude and knowledge to confront them.

So you're implying a realist can't be romantic? Or perhaps a realist isn't supposed to be romantic, because it isn't suppose to be practiced in reality?

This post has been edited by peinsama: Mar 7 2009, 09:26 AM

If i had a chance to exchange my soul and mind to you, i can guran-damn-tee i will make your body to go and approach women and learn more about them. No doubt about it. The only thing that separates both of us is that i choose my thoughts according to what i want. I dare to fail more than you and i have a strong will to succeed. You seriously should hang on and trust to your own free will. Unfortunately, you had use it to your disadvantages. Not to mention solidifying what is already worse.

If you expect people to understand your situation, yes, we can give you the sympathy and the attention and also the acknowledgement of your own situation on how bitter and suffering it is. But let me ask you a question, 'How far are you able to grow after we do give you those three?' How would you able to to help yourself by telling us all your experiences? At the end of the day, its still YOU are the one that should change. Not us. You just have to prove us that you're as good as us. Make the right choice.

You might as well have courage and change your own situation instead of whining how women should at least open-up to you. Its how you present yourself to create an image and impression towards the woman's perception about you. I can't say much especially when im not there to look actually what went wrong between you and the women you'd approach. There are definitely mistakes that you have done. Perhaps you're the silent type, or perhaps you're not capable of carrying yourself to make a decent conversation or maybe the woman herself isn't interesting as well. Whatever it is, please don't count your failures. What's the point? Can you exactly tell me what's the point of telling me how often women rejecting you? As if i'd never been rejected. Its about how you deal with it and carry on with your life with the new enriched experiences. Learn from it. I don't count my trophies nor do i count my mistakes. The only thing that matters to me, is to be confident every time and every where i go. If others think im shy and silent, well what can i do. Yeah it sucks because it differs from what i tried to portray to them. But its their beliefs and i still gotta prove to them im otherwise through my own characteristics and persona rather than telling them i'm not what they think i am. I don't go dwell and count my disappointments as a failure. I use that to my own advantage and build meself a better person.

You only live once. I don't care whether im going to be resurrected again or not. I only care, before im being whipped and boiled in hell by Saddam himself and his comrades or perhaps being adored by the beautiful ponies or chicas in heaven, i just make sure i live good before i'm sent to either hell or heaven.

Whether the women is hot or not, its a subjective matter. In this case, im not going to debate on how shallow you are or not. Im not entitled to make a judgment on that.



Yes it all boils down to handle the aftermath. And sir, what and how do you suggest to handle such aftermath? Aren't your thread is about dealing more with expectations before the underlying outcomes occur? Isn't it more interesting on how to deal with the aftermath of broken heart? Or is it more interesting for people to understood the averse way and hopefully wouldn't get rejected thus smaller the chances to get hurt? Which is more interesting here? Last i checked even Marius Panzarella or David Deangelo can't guarantee a relationship unless you're being content and know that yourself is a complete being and being appreciative towards what was given to you by nature. Even they insist that its all about choices you make.

My advices and suggestions here is simple. DO help yourself first. That's the best gift you will receive in your whole life.

This post has been edited by peinsama: Mar 7 2009, 12:18 PM