Movie Entertainment Magazine out of Canada features a Summerslam advertisement that lists Shawn Michaels as appearing on the show.

-Live from the Wachovia Center in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania!

-Legacy makes their way to the ring, but who will Jericho's partner be?

-Jericho makes his way out by himself, and he grabs the mic. He reminds us what happens to Edge by showing us the video of the surgery and Edge saying that it could end his career. Jericho says he was wrong to choose Edge as his partner, he is frail, weak, injury prone and selfish. WHAT ABOUT ME? Jericho was left high and dry, but it is all over. He has chosen a partner worthy to hold the titles and to stand next to Chris Jericho. His partner is…THE BIG SHOW!

Unified Tag Team Title Match: Chris Jericho and © vs. Ted Dibiase and Cody Rhodes

Show and Rhodes to begin. Rhodes tries to stay away from him, fails and eats some chops in the corner. Show they tosses him across the ring, pulls Rhodes back from the floor but Rhodes stun guns him and tags in Dibiase. Shoulder block by Show levels him. Rights to the gut, chops, and a tag to Jericho. Show whips Jericho into Dibiase, off the ropes and a back elbow by Jericho. Tag back to Show, big right to the gut again and Dibiase is down. Show works him over, tag to Jericho and he slams Jericho onto Dibiase and he covers for 2. Knee by Dibiase, rights follow, tag to Rhodes and off the ropes, reversal and a knee by Show and Jericho rolls by Rhodes for 2. Jericho off the ropes, Dibiase pulls the top rope down and Jericho falls to the floor. Rhodes out and slams him to the apron. Tag back to Dibiase, lays the boots to Jericho, Rhodes in and the hi-low takes Jericho down and Dibiase covers for 2. Tag back to Rhodes, lots of Y2J chants as Jericho is whipped to the corner. Knees by Rhodes, snap mare and into the cravat. Jericho to his feet, elbows out, tries a sunset flip, but Rhodes escapes and lands rights to Jericho. Boots follow, tag to Dibiase and he distracts the ref as Rhodes chokes out Jericho. Dibiase stops a tag by Jericho, slams him to the corner and tags in Rhodes. To the corner, Jericho avoids him and lands rights. To the corner, boot by Rhodes, up top and hits the moonsault and covers Jericho for 2! Enziguri by Jericho and BOTH men are down! Tag to Dibiase and he stops Jericho, who then gets a roll up for 2. Clothesline by Dibiase, off the ropes and Dibiase with the powerslam for 2. Rights by Jericho, but Dibiase takes him down, boot to the head and a cover for 2. Dibiase misses the corner splash, goes for the walls of Jericho, countered and then Jericho avoids dream street, and locks in the walls of Jericho! Show distracts the ref trying to get in as Rhodes sneaks in, DDT on Jericho and Dibiase covers for 2! Off the ropes, dropkick by Dibiase but Show blind tagged in!. Legacy beats him down, but Show SPEARS Dibiase as Jericho dumps Rhodes, but he makes the save anyway. Rhodes skins the cat, dropkicks Show and Jericho in, CODEBREAKER on Dibiase! Colossal Clutch by Show and Dibiase taps!

Winners: Show and Jericho @ 10:00 via submission
Rating:


-Josh Matthews is with CM Punk. Punk will ask a question of his own, to the crowd. After everything he said, telling the truth, are you still behind Jeff Hardy? They cheer. He takes the mic and goes into the crowd. He asks again and they cheer Hardy louder. So if you are a Jeff Hardy fan, wearing a diabolical arm sleeve, stand up and make some noise. They do and Punk asks the cameraman to get a good shot. Punk says the truth is that he doesn't blame them for supporting Hardy. He blames their parents. Or, to be real, more likely parent. It's obviously a single parent situation, like how Jeff grew up. The parent is afraid of the relationship with the child failing like their marriage did, that they will allow anything. And the fact that you let the kids look up to Jeff, shows that they don't care about their kids. The parents do not teach them the proper way to live. It starts with a Hardy t-shirt, goes to a Hardy shirt, then cigarettes, and then whiskey and marijuana. And then street drugs and then rummaging through mom's purse for her prescription medications. Parents, save your kids, teach them the right way. Just say yes, yes to a straight edge and drug free America, to a true world champion, thank you!

-ECW Title match is next...

ECW Title Match: Tommy Dreamer © vs. Christian

Lock up, to the corner and they break, and then slap the piss out of each other! Shoulder block by Dreamer, Christian kips up and takes Dreamer down. Side headlock by Christian, off the ropes and a spinning leg kick by Christian gets 2. A whip to the corner, Christian moves, tries to kick Dreamer but that is blocked, and Dreamer with the neck breaker for 2. Chops by Christian, Dreamer to the apron and Christian charges, eats the shoulder and Dreamer tries to suplex him to the floor, blocked, rights by Christian, to the floor and slams Dreamer to the apron. Baseball slide dropkick by Christian. He then misses the slingshot cross body, and that allows Dreamer to get the cannonball off of the apron. Back into the ring and Dreamer covers for 2. Dreamer gets the running powerslam for 2. Dreamer to the 2nd rope, Christian pulls him off of the ropes and then gets the snap mare, kick to the back and then lands rights. Goes for the kill switch, countered by Dreamer, but Christian gets the sleeper. Dreamer drops back and slams Christian to the mat. Christian goes for the sleeper again, but Dreamer charges the ropes and both men tumble to the floor. The ref counts them as they lay on the floor, they struggle to get into the ring, Dreamer in, Christian up top and leaps into a knee. Flapjack by Dreamer and a cover for 2. Dreamer sets Christian in the tree of woe, backs off, ECW, charges and gets the dropkick. Boot, DDT try countered and a sky high by Dreamer and a cover for 2. Pump handle countered by Christian, inverted DDT gets 2. Christian goes to the 2nd rope, dropkick connects and then back up top and Dreamer catches the legs, Texas cloverleaf by Dreamer! Christian rolls, rights to Dreamer, and then Dreamer catapults him to the corner. Christian with the boot, sunset flip, counter, another counter and then Dreamer misses the charge, kicks by Christian, up top and the missile dropkick connects! Christian looks for the kill switch, counter, another and KILL SWITCH connects! 1…2…3!

Winner and NEW ECW CHAMPION Christian @ 9:00 via pin

-Dreamer and Christian hug after the match.


-Summerslam commercial.

-Todd Grisham is with Show and Jericho. Show says they aren't friends, they are champions. This is about business. Jericho says that choosing Show was a great business decision, and together, they will dominate more than any other tag team in history. Show says it is about strength, size, agility, and they have over 40 title between them. Well, there is one thing. Jericho thanks Edge for making this all possible.

US Title match next.

Primo is replacing the Big Show.

US Title Six Pack Challenge Match: Kofi Kingston © vs. Primo vs. MVP vs. The Miz vs. Carlito vs. Jack Swagger

First with the pin or submission wins, and there are no tags. Cluster f*** to begin as they all attack and looks for quick roll ups. Primo chases Carlito, but the Miz attacks him. Carlito and Kofi pair off, sweet counters and Kofi nails Carlito with the elbow as Carlito goes for the springboard elbow. Primo and Swagger pair off and Primo gets a RANA off of the 2nd rope. Springboard cross by Primo onto Miz for 2. Swagger gets the DOCTOR bomb, but Carlito makes the save. Swagger tosses Carlito to the floor, rights by MVP and he gets the overhead throw. They brawl to the floor, Miz and Kofi in the ring as Swagger tosses MVP to the barricade. Kofi up top, and then pulls Miz to the floor. Swagger and MVP brawl and Carlito gets the senton to the floor! Swagger and Kofi in the ring now, dropkick by Kofi and then a missile dropkick. BO BO BO leg drop and a cover for 2. Miz made the save. Clothesline to Kofi, corner clothesline to Swagger and then goes up top. Primo over, stops him and goes up with him. I smell a tower of doom. Kofi over, and up top with them. Swagger over and TOWER OF DOOM~! Smells good. Carlito with a dropkick to Swagger. Tries covers on random people and fails. MVP trips him up, starts to clean house a bit, but the Miz slams him to the corner. Carlito and Primo collide mid ring, Swagger whips Kofi to the corner, misses the charge, mounted rights by Kofi, but Swagger powerslams him. Miz tosses to the floor, MVP cross bodies Swagger to the floor. Carlito and Kofi in, sunset flip by Kofi for 2. Primo in and tries a sunset flip on Carlito, but Kofi rolls him up for 2. Carlito wants to work with Primo, but Swagger double clotheslines them. Miz to the floor, Swagger MURDERS Kofi with a clothesline. MVP in, knee buster on Swagger. Off the ropes, BALLIN~! Playmaker cstopped by Miz, gets the stroke on MVP by Carlito and Primo break that up. They clean house, and Carlito tricks Primo, BACK STABBER. Kofi nails the trouble in paradise on Carlito and that is all.

Winner: Kofi Kingston @ 9:00 via pin


-Josh Matthews is with Randy Orton. Orton says that Legacy was unfair, they didn't see Big Show coming. He would beat HHH or Cena one on one, but tonight, in a triple threat he can lose without being pinned. But their egos will not allow them to co-exist, and he will win. He says one day they will cheer him and show him respect, but no matter what, he will remain the WWE champion.

Women's title match is next.

WWE Women's Title Match: Michelle McCool © vs. Melina

As Melina does the split, McCool hits the basement dropkick and sends her to the floor. Bell rings and Melina tackles McCool. Matrix by Melina to avoid the kick, to the corner and a side kick by Melina. McCool tries to run and gets the ropes. Off the ropes, tilt a whirl into the side kick by Melina. McCool lays on the middle rope, and moves as Melina tries to choke her out with the flying leg. McCool beats down Melina on the floor, rolls her back in and gets the single leg crab. Melina's foot in back by her head, bendy. Melina looks for the ropes, but McCool pulls back further with the leg. Breaks that, traps Melina in the ropes and kicks her to the floor. McCool misses the big boot and crotches herself on the barricade. Melina on the barricade, they stand, and McCool DDT's Melina on the barricade! Melina back to the apron, gets a head scissors on McCool and slams her to the apron. Melina flies off of the apron and gets a face buster to McCool. Back into the ring they go, kick by McCool takes Melina down. Melina trips her into the ropes and gets the charging knees to the back. Melina slams her to the corner, kick to the head follows and then lays McCool on the middle ropes and gets the double knee drop to the gut. Spin wheel kick by Melina gets 2. Riights by Melina, but McCool back with a belly to belly suplex for 2. McCool spears Melina to the corner, kick by Melina, Melina flies off of the ropes with the Thesz Press, but McCool counters it into a roll up and gets the pin.

Winner: Michelle McCool @ 7:00 via pin


WWE Title match is next.

-John Cena is backstage and prepares for his match.

WWE Title Match: Randy Orton © vs. HHH vs. John Cena

They stand off to begin things, Orton backs off, and slides out of the ring. Cena and HHH stare down, and then chase Orton. Orton back into the ring and they follow. Rights by HHH, off the ropes and Orton to the floor, Cena meets him with a clothesline. Cena tosses Orton back in, rights by HHH in the corner and then whips him to the corner, reversal and Cena gets a bulldog on Orton. They continue to beat Orton down and he bails again. Cena and HHH chase, HHH slams Orton to the barricade. More rights by HHH, Cena drags Orton to the ring and Orton then charges and knocks Cena into HHH. DRAMA. Orton back to the floor, grabs Cena and tosses him back into the ring. Orton beats him down as HHH lays on the floor. Mounted rights by Orton, and then the stomps. More rights follow, and then one to HHH as he tries to make his way back into the ring. Cena comes back with the shoulder blocks, PROTO BOMB and Cena says you can't see him. Oh, but I can. 5-knuckle shuffle and now the FU try, HHH in and SLAMS Cena to the steel post. Orton sets, clothesline to HHH and a cover for 2. Orton lays the boots to HHH now, and is in control. Standing dropkick by Orton gets 2. Chinlock by Orton applied, HHH to his feet, rights to Orton, they trade center ring, off the ropes and a powerslam by Orton and BOTH men are down. Orton up first, stalks HHH, RKO countered and then the DDT by HHH. Cena is up and climbs to the top rope…DOUBLE FAMEASSER overshoots, but close enough for jazz. Rights to both by Cena, which the crowd does not approve of. 3.0 neck breaker by Orton to Cena, and he rolls to the floor. Pedigree try, but Orton tosses HHH over the top and to the floor. Orton regroups in the ring as Cena tries to crawl back into the ring. Cena to the apron, and Orton kicks him…HHH up and Orton has him….DOUBLE HANGMAN'S DDT try countered and they toss Orton to the floor!

We're 10-minutes in now and Cena and HHH start to brawl. BOO, YEAH as they trade, they do not like Cena. Off the ropes and the shoulder blocks by Cena. HHH catches him on the third try with the high Harley Race knee, face buster by HHH and then Cena back with the front flipping neck breaker. FU countered, pedigree countered and then HHH out of the STF. FU countered again, spinebuster by HHH! Pedigree try, LANDS! 1…2…Orton pulls HHH to the floor. Orton slams HHH to the steps, and then dismantles one of the announce tables. Orton slams HHH to the table, and climbs onto it. Pulls HHH up, LOW BLOW by HHH! Cena over LOW BLOW to HHH! Cena tosses Orton into the crowd! Cena gets the STF on HHH On the announce table! Orton breaks that up and rolls Cena back into the ring. They trade rights, boos for Cena again. Orton in control, off the ropes and a boot to Cena. Orton stalks Cerna now, RKO countered! HHH stil on the table as Cena sets Orton on the top rope. Rights to Orton, Cena up top with him now. HHH slides in and grabs Cena on his shoulders…escapes and Cena then catapults HHH into Orton who crotches himself! STF by Cena on HHH! HHH fights, powers up and works for the ropes, Cena releases, pulls him back center and gets the hold again! Orton back in and CONCUSSION KICK MISSES! Roll up by Cena gets 2! Orton clotheslines Cena down, and ALL THREE MEN are down! Orton to his feet, HHH and Cena are down and he lays the boots to both men. Orton in control here, knee drop to Cena three times and then a fourth. Knee drops to HHH. Misses one, and HHH is up and works the knee of Orton. PROTO BOMB by Cena! Cena off the ropes, but HHH pulls the ropes down and Cena flies to the floor. HHH now locks in the sharp shooter on Orton! Orton struggles, refuses to tap and Cena is in and gets the STF on Orton as well! Orton taps…but the ref cannot stop the match because both men have the submission. And now Legacy hit the ring and beat down HHH and Cena. There is NO DQ in the triple threat match, so this is gravy by the rules. Rhodes checks on Orton, and Cena goes for the FU, but Orton RKO's him! 1…2…3. Cody Rhodes: Sacrificial Lamb.

Winner: Randy Orton @ 23:00 via pin


-Maryse stretches backstage and Miz hits on her. She says maybe they can meet after the match and she will show him some more moves. She then says he lost tonight, and doesn't want to be seen with a loser. He says he can get any chick he wants, and wasted his time with her, because he got nothing out of it. He then calls her a tease, and says when she loses the title, she will crawl back to him, and she will have butchered that chance, like she constantly butchers the English language.

Divas title match up next.


Divas Title Match: Maryse © vs. Mickie James

James tries to attack before the bell, but gets held back by the ref. Here we go as the bell rings, Maryse avoids James early on, and poses. Lock up, to the ropes and James pulls her down and they get back to the feet, still locked up, and a go behind by James. They break, Maryse runs to the ropes and she poses. James attacks, grabs her hair and then gets a roll up with the bridge for 2. Off the ropes, snap mare by James, basement dropkick and a cover for 3. Back elbow by James, goes for the head scissors, tossed to the apron and Maryse then lights her up with a high kick. Sup Cro Cop. The ref counts on James as Maryse wants him to count faster. James back in, Maryse grabs her by the hair and slams her to the mat. Maryse talks shit, forearms by James, off the ropes and a back elbow by Maryse and a cover for 2. Maryse HUMBLES James with the camel clutch variation. Maryse slaps her repeatedly, wipes her face on the mat and then reapplied the hold. James escapes, but Maryse dumps her to the floor. She follows, slaps James a bit, and then roll sher back in. Maryse grabs the spray bottle, slides back into the ring and a side kick by James. She grabs the spray, they go to the floor and the ref takes it from her. Mickey then Thesz Presses Maryse on the floor, rights follow and then slams her to the apron. James goes up top, leaps in and Maryse moves, James hits hard, and Maryse covers for 2. Camel clutch variation once again by Maryse, James works to escape, to her knees and then stands with Maryse on her back, drops back and both ladies are down. They trade blows from the knees, make your own jokes, James slams her to the mat. They brawl, charging forearm by James, a clothesline follows and another. Neck breaker by James and a cover for 2. To the corner, a whip, counter and a back elbow by James. Head scissors follows, but Maryse pulls her into the ropes and rolls her up for 2. Boot by James, but Maryse tosses her off, counter and P the primal DDT by James and that is all.

Winner and NEW CHAMPION Mickie James @ 9:00 via pin


IC Title match is next.


-Josh Matthews is with Legacy. He says they failed, and Dibiase says that people will remember that Orton is still the champion. Rhodes says that Cena and HHH lost, and they have a sense of accomplishment due to that. They are cementing their legacy.

WWE IC Title Match: Rey Mysterio © vs. Dolph Ziggler w/Maria

And here is Ziggler's big chance. Lock up to begin, to the corner and Ziggler shoves Rey. He backs off, they circle, and a dropkick by Ziggler into a roll up for a quick 2. Rey backs off, they circle and Rey gets a roll up for 1. They talk some shit, lock up and a side headlock by Ziggler. Rey escapes, but Zigglerd rops him with the shoulder block for 1. A Clothesline gets 1 as well. Back to the headlock by Ziggler, Rey to his feet and off the ropes, counter and a boot by Ziggler. They blow a head scissors spot as Rey never got up to lock in the head scissors. Rey goes for a RANA, but Ziggler powerbombs him to the corner and covers for 2. Ziggler lays the boots to Rey, whips him to the corner and Rey hits hard and drops. Ziggler covers for 2. Ziggler works the chinlock now, works in a headstand spot as well, and drops back down. Rey looks to escape, Ziggler keeps him down for a bit, but Rey up and escapes. Knees by Ziggler, a whip to the corner, but Rey gets a head scissors and sends Ziggler ro the steel post. Rey to the apron, springboards in with the seated senton, and then the springboard cross body gets 2. Boot by Rey, off the ropes but runs into a snap slam for a close 2. Suplex by Ziggler, counter and Rey low bridges him to the floor. Rey to the apron, and leaps off with the seated senton. Rey rolls him back into the ring, goes up top and Ziggler stops that. Grabs up Rey, Rey fights out, and then eats a boot to the gut. Rey counters a tiger driver into the RANA, 619 misses, and Ziggler tosses Rey to the floor and he slides into the announce table. Ziggler rolls Rey back in and covers for 2. Ziggler beats down Rey, and back into the half camel clutch. Rey to his feet, full nelson now by Ziggler, Rey escapes, off the ropes and a slam by Ziggler gets 2. Elbow drop by Ziggler and a cover for 2.

Ziggler lays the boots to Rey, taunts Rey and gets the full nelson again as we are 10-minutes into the match. Rey kicks away at the knee to escape, off the ropes and after a counter, Ziggler gets a roll up for 2, countered by Rey into a roll up for 2. Kick to the head by Rey gets 2. Ziggler with the jawbreaker and into the cover for 2. To the corner, rights by Ziggler and the ref pulls him back. A whip to the corner, drop toehold by Rey and then charges, sent to the apron, stops Ziggler and then goes up top and leaps into the dropkick by Ziggler! 1…2…NO! Ziggler covers again for another 2. Ziggler lays the boots to Rey, and now stalks him. Misses the knee charge and hits the corner hard. Rey with rights to Ziggler, sets him up top, Rey up as well, they battle, Ziggler has Rey on his shoulders…MALENKO GUT BUSTER on Rey and that gets a CLOSE 2! Ziggler is PISSES now. Boots by Rey, enziguri, 619 connects! Slingshot splash and that is all.

Winner: Rey Mysterio @ 14:00 via pin


-Video for Punk vs. Hardy.

World Title Match: CM Punk © vs. Jeff Hardy

Punk works the kicks to begin. Punk asks if Jeff is serious about this and what he could possibly do to him. Lock up, side headlock by Punk, and Punk then uses chain wrestling to make Jeff look foolish. He then just asks "WHAT?" They circle, side headlock again as Punk laughs at Jeff. Jeff works to escape, off the ropes and a shoulder block by Punk. Punk stops a hip toss, tries the GTS, Jeff escapes and gets a few clotheslines. To the corner, shoulder blocks by Jeff, to the other corner and Punk hits hard. Backdrop countered into the sunset flip by Punk and he gets 2. Punk goes to the chinlock, Punk out and they hit the ropes, Punk drops to the mat and Hardy flies to the floor off of the miss. Punk claps and is happy with himself, and then goes for the suicide dive, but Jeff moves and Punk splats on the floor. Sucks to be him. Back into the ring they go and Jeff covers for 2. Neck breaker by Jeff, up top, but Punk rolls to the floor. Jeff FLIES to the floor, but Punk sidesteps him and Jeff crashes into the barricade. Punk demands that the ref counts out Jeff, and he barely beats the count. Punk then covers for 2. Kicks and knees to the back by Punk just beating Jeff down and covers again for 2. A whip to the corner by Punk and Jeff hits hard and falls to the mat. Punk again covers for 2. Punk now works the bow and arrow on Jeff, Jeff is able to roll off of the knees into a cover for 2. Punk goes back to work on the lower back of Jeff, sets him up top now and follows him up. Jeff fights back and gets the gourd buster off of the second rope! BOTH men are down now, working to their feet, up and slaps by Punk. Rights follow, they trade now and off the ropes, lariat by Jeff. A right, forearm strike and then the atomic drop. Leg drop to the balls by Jeff, basement dropkick and a cover for 2!

10-minutes in now, to the corner they go, Jeff up top and Punk crotches him, no whisper in the wind for Jeff. Punk charges, KNEES to the grill! Jeff counters the bulldog, and gets the whisper in the wind! 1…2…NO! Slam by Jeff, up top, MISSES the swanton! Punk roll shim over, gets the butterfly lock, Welcome to Chicago Motherf***er! Dragon clutch by Punk now, Jeff manages to get the ropes. Punk backs off, sets to deliver the death blows, kicks, slaps, misses the back fist and Jeff gets the twist of fate! Up top now…SWANTON eats knees! Punk covers and gets a CLOSE 2! Punk now goes to the apron, springboards in, eats the boot, counters by both, GTS! 1…2…NO! Roll up and gets 2. Another cover for 2! Punk is PISSED! Punk rolls to the floor, grabs the title belt and slings it onto his shoulder and leaves. The referee counts, Jeff hits the floor and chases him! He attacks, runs back to the ring with Punk and starts to beat his ass. The ref tries to pull Jeff away, and he then gets the twist of fate! Up top….SWANTON BOMB! 1…2….3!

Winner: Jeff Hardy @ 15:00 via pin

new champion! thx god Jeff won! i love it! and RKO too! and Cap Chrisma too! but too bad Maryse lost

-Live from Mohegan Sun Arena in Mohegan Sun, CT

-Hosted by Michael Cole & Jerry "The King" Lawler

-Raw starts, and OH MY GOD EDDIE GUERRERO IS ALIVE!!! Oh wait its just Jeremy Piven in a Low Rider, and he has Dr. Ken in the trunk of the car dressed as a pimp. And he's handing out money. This is either going to be incredible, or a trainwreck of epic proportions. There is no middle ground. They go through the introductions in a total obnoxious manner that makes me lean towards trainwreck. Piven says he's always wanted to do this, and there's something else he always wanted to do. He goes to the ramp, and gets Edge's pyro as Ken screams "Oh no he didn't" and barks like a dog. Oh dear god. Piven says we've got a huge show tonight, as he announces HHH vs. Legacy and thankfully Miz interrupts to hopefully save this. Miz asks if Piven is having fun, and if he's enjoying making a mockery of the show. Miz says like Piven he is an acclaimed TV star as well. Dr. Ken thinks that's funny. Piven calls him Le Miz, and then goes right back to pimping his movie. Piven makes fun of Miz's Real World past, and again pimps his movie saying all the fans have The Goods. Piven tells Miz he can look into his eyes, and can tell he doesn't have the goods. Miz tries to interrupt, but Ken constantly interrupts drawing the ire of Miz. Miz finally announces that he wants a match with Cena tonight, and demands a rematch. He orders Piven to make it happen, and says if he doesn't he won't hesitate to… He doesn't get to finish as Cena interrupts. Cena introduces himself to Piven, and Ken, and then says he needs to cut to the chase. He says the rematch can happen, but he wrestled him last week and it took him two minutes. He says he can fit that into his schedule, but the fans already know Miz isn't that good. He makes fun of Miz's looks saying he has a face for radio, and then says if this is what we're going with tonight needs to be special. Cena says Piven's movie is coming out and he plays the most successful used car salesman. He calls Miz a 1979 Pinto, and says its Piven's job to somehow to make this match interesting. Shoot comment? Piven wants to make sure Miz can't hide, so he books a lumberjack match. Oh my, a lumberjack match, and a handicap match on the same show. I can't take the innovation! Piven goes on to say that we're going to Miz's hometown soon, and if he loses to Cena tonight he'll be banned from SUMMERFEST!!!! Cena suggests that maybe we should ban him from SummerSLAM as well. Nice cover John. They keep jabbering and eventually its decided that Miz will be banned from Raw if he loses tonight. So he can go to Smackdown and feud with Morrison, right? Well then LETS GO CENA!

Evan Bourne vs. Jack Swagger
This is a rematch of last week's beat the clock upset by Bourne. Swagger gets a takedown early, and grabs a waist lock slamming Bourne to the mat. Bourne ducks a charge, and hits a dropkick. To the top rope he goes, but Swagger is up so Bourne jumps over the top of him. Bourne gets a trip, and goes for a standing moonsault but gets the knees. Swagger goes for the gutwrench, but Bourne counters into a rollup for two. Swagger comes back with a boot to the face, and a powerbomb followed by some pushups. That sets up the Gutwrench Powerbomb which finishes Evan at 2:17 which would have won Beat the Clock by over 2 minutes. Swagger is obviously not clutch. After the match Swagger hits a pair of Vader Bombs to drive the point home. He goes for a second gutwrench, but MVP makes the save. Pretty much a squash.
Winner: Jack Swagger (Pinfall-Gutwrench Powerbomb ¾*)

-If you didn't watch Raw last week, and judging by the ratings you did, here's a really long recap. Complete with all the mainstream news clips. The moral of the story? "We're important!" Cole says Raw footage was all over ESPN, Entertainment shows, and EVEN YOU TUBE! I got news for you Cole. Every Raw ends up on You Tube

-Jeremy Piven is chillin with the divas, and when hyper Ken comes in. He makes fun of Big Show a bit, and of course Show shows up behind his back. Show wants a match with Shaq, but Piven says to forget about that. Show says he's got an idea to make people forget about Show and Shaq. He wants to wrestle Piven. Piven decides that's a poor idea, but instead books him to US title match with Kofi. Dr. Ken may be the most annoying human being on the planet. I actually liked him in The Hangover too.

-If you didn't catch the first 900 mentions of it, here's a preview of Jeremy Piven's new movie.

Mickie James & Gail Kim vs. Beth Phoenix & Jillian Hall
Jillian Hall is still alive? I haven't seen her in months. Beth starts with Gail, and gets a low dropkick. Mickie tags in and delivers another dropkick for two, but a knee to the mid section sends Mickie to the apron. Mickie delviers a forearm, and then comes off the top with Bombs Away for two. Mickie gives Jillian a shot on the apron, but charges at Beth and gets clotheslined on the top rope for two. Beth slams Mickie down by the hair, and tags in Jillian. Jillian rams Mickie's face into the mat, and then hits a forearm. Jillian drives Mickie into the corner with Beth, but charges into a pair of boots. Mickie fights out of the corner, and hits a spinning headscissors allowing her to tag in Gail. Clotheslines from Gail connect, and that is followed by a running shoulder tackle. Gail heads to the top and hits a missilie dropkick, and then knocks Beth off the apron. Gail gets a back elbow from Jillian, but moves out of the way of a handspring elbow. Beth makes the blind tag without Gail's knowledge and is able to attack her from behind. Mickie tries to make the save but is put out by the ref, and then pulled to the floor by Jillian. Beth then promptly finishes with the Glam Slam at at 3:21. Not a bad match for the time it got, but it just seems like they're biding their time until the figure out what to do with the division now that Maryse is out.
Winners: Beth Phoenix & Jillian Hall (Phoenix pins Kim-Glam Slam *1/2)

2 on 1 Handicap Match: Cody Rhodes & Ted Dibiase vs. Triple H
For those of you unfamiliar with this incredibly rare gimmick match, a handicap match is where a tag team (in this case Rhodes and Dibiase) face one man in a standard one fall match. Sometimes with all the gimmick matches out there its easy to get confused, so that's why I'm here to help. Cody starts the match, and sends HHH into the corner. HHH fights out with ease, and grabs a side headlock on Cody. Shoulderblock connects by HHH, and that is followed by a vertical suplex. HHH connects with a knee drop, but Cody blocks a backdrop allowing him to tag in Ted. Dibiase runs into a clothesline from HHH, but eventually stops a charge with a boot to the face. HHH stops a backdrop attempt with a pedigree attempt, but Cody interrupts. Cody gets a backdrop and a clothesline over the top to the floor, and that is followed by Ted getting chucked over the top onto him as we head to break. Back from commercial and to the shock of everyone Legacy actually has control of the match. Cody has HHH in a front facelock, but HHH quickly comes free. Dibiase tags in, and Cody hits a clothesline on his way out. Dibiase rams HHH into the heel corner, and stomps him down before tagging Cody back in. They trade stomps and quick tags in the corner, and do the standard heel team distract the ref choke out spot. Cody covers for two, and tags Dibiase back in allowing them to hit a double suplex for two. Dibiase grabs a half nelson chinlock, and then hits a powerslam for two. Cody tags in, and hits a kneedrop for two. Cody grabs a chinlock, and then hits a DDT for two. Cody goes for the moonsault which fails miserably, and puts both men down. That allows HHH to make the hot tag to himself, and deliver a forearm to Dibiase sending him to the floor. HHH fires Dibiase into the apron, and then comes back in with the VINTAGE HIGH KNEE~! Facebuster connects on Cody, and then he gets sent into Dibiase sending him crashing into the announce table. Spinebuster connects to Cody, and that sets up the Pedigree. Dibiase makes the save from behind hitting Dream Street, and Cody crawls for the cover. Of course it only gets two. Cody measures Triple H, and hits the Cross Rhodes and THAT GETS THE WIN AT 11:21!!!!!!!!!!! Rhodes and Dibiase win clean in what has to be the upset of the decade.
Winners: Cody Rhodes & Ted Dibiase (Rhodes Pinfall-Cross Rhodes **1/2)

- HHH grabs the mic after the match, and says every week these guys beat him every week. He says he used to be good at this gang warfare stuff, but maybe he needs a new group. Or maybe he just needs to bring back an old group. He says maybe he'll bring back Evolution, but Randy's a jerk, Batista's injured all the time, and Flair's signing autographs at the VFW. No maybe he just needs to make one phone call. And if they're not down with that he's got two words for them…

-Chavo stops by to introduce himself to Jeremy Piven, and mistakes him for Joe Rogan. Piven books Hornswoggle-Chavo VI…THIS TIME ITS PERSONAL! No handicaps this week, but once Chavo leaves Piven says he has a plan.

Carlito vs. Primo
It's a Colonic Explosion! Primo attacks early pounding away at Carlito in the corner, and then hitting a spinning headscissor. Carlito stops a backdrop, and throws Primo the apron but walks into a shoulder block. Primo is back in with a clothesline for two sending Carlito to the floor. Primo hits a suicide dive, and then fires Carlito back inside for another two count. Carlito comes back with a modified neckbreaker for two, and then hits an elbow drop getting another two count. Carlito grabs a reverse chinlock, but Primo is able to elbow free. Primo hits a back elbow off the ropes, and delivers a dropkick. Primo hits a monkeyflip, but misses a charge and shoulders the post. Carlito goes for the backstabber, but Primo counters into a rollup for two. Carlito comes right back with another backstabber which is this time successful to pick up the win at 3:10. They broke up one of the best teams they had for a 3 minute match. Thanks a lot WWE.
Winner: Carlito (Pinfall-Backstabber *)

Chavo Guerrero vs. Mark Henry
Jeremy Piven announces that Hornswoggle couldn't make it because of a case of adult chicken pox so he instead found his cousin. Mark Swoggle. Henry comes out wearing a Hornswoggle hat which sets a new standard of awesome. Henry of course destroys Chavo with a headbutt, and Chavo tries to run. Henry hears none of that throwing Chavo back inside and hitting the Worlds Strongest Slam at 1:11. Chavo has done those hair replacement ads, so I can confirm that a wig was in fact split. After the match Mark finds his little cousin hiding under the ring. Henry pulls Chavo to the corner allowing Horny to hit the tadpole splash. People are going to be b**** about poor Chavo being buried, but hey at least he's collecting a paycheck every week. Afterwards the Swoggle family celebrates with a dance and heel kick. Good stuff.
Winner: Mark Henry (Pinfall-Worlds Strongest Slam ¼*)

-Randy Orton stops by to talk to Jeremy Piven. Piven says he wants him to be the special ring announcer for the main event. Orton asks who he thinks he is, and Piven says he's here to promote his movie. Orton says if he could kick Vince in the skull what makes them think he'd hesitate doing the same thing to them. He successfully scares the shit out of Dr. Ken, but Piven says they'll figure it out.

WWE United States Championship: Kofi Kingston © vs. The Big Show (w. Chris Jericho)
Jericho comes out with Show, and their new EPIC theme remix. Jericho increases the quality of the announce team by about a billion percent by joining them on color. Kofi tries attack with a series of kicks, but gets caught by Show and DDT's his foot as called by Jericho. Show grabs a front facelock and pushes Kofi into the corner. Show hammers Kofi down, and then steps on his head. Show buries a shoulderblock into Kofi in the corner, and then delivers a huge open hand chop. Show hammers Kofi down again with a forearm, but Kofi comes back with a series of kicks. Kofi tries a dive off the second rope, but gets caught and slammed away. Show hits a Vader Bomb, but Kofi gets his foot on the bottom rope for two. Show hits a snap mare, and then stomps Kofi in the gut. Hilarious commentary from Jericho saying how he and Show have 40 Championships combined, and he asks Lawler (who has over 100) how many he has. Lawler says "I've had a few" and Jericho responds "I'm not talking bowling alley titles Jerry" Kofi comes back with a series of kicks, and then hits a trouble in paradise with Show on his knees. Kofi hits a double legdrop from the top rope, but that only gets a two count. Show comes right back with a spear, and then delivers a series of punches in the corner. The ref warns, but Show refuses to stop punching and he gets disqualified at 5:15. Yes he got DQ'd for closed fists. It has now officially happened (not counting heel guest referees/authority figures ordering it). This is a first. Afterward Show continues the beatdown, and he and Jericho stand triumphant.
Winner: STILL WWE United States Champion-Kofi Kingston (Disqualification-Closed Fist *)

-Triple H is on the phone with "someone" and says he knows what he said about not coming back, but he never believed him before. He asks if he saw what happened to him, but that someone isn't watching the show. HHH asks where he is, and then says he thought he didn't do jobs. OOOOOH Insider comments. Vintage Russo! Finally he tells him to forget all of that, because he needs him. He asks if he's ready, but he gets hung up on. Probably going to drag this out a few weeks, because I doubt they want Shawn's triumphant return to be in Calgary.

-Next week's guest host is Sgt. Slaughter. In Canada. Brilliant. At least it's a wrestling personality.

Lumberjack Match: John Cena vs. The Miz
So Miz has to leave Raw, and is banned from Summerslam if he loses. Piven says he's a big fan of Randy Orton, and has hand picked every lumberjack himself. Piven heel turn ftw! Dr. Ken makes fun of the crowd, and that brings out Randy Orton. Orton motions to his lumberjacks. Legacy, Chavo, Masters, Carlito, and Swagger. Looks like Randy had new Legacy shirt made, and he actually got one for both Ted and Cody. Miz attacks at the bell, and hammers Cena down in the corner with a series of stomps. Cena comes back whipping Miz to the corner, but he charges into an elbow. Cena rolls outside, but realizes where he's at and comes right back in. Cena hits a bulldog, and clotheslines Miz to the floor. The heels attend to Miz on the floor making sure he's okay before he goes back inside. Cena goes for the STF, but the heels jump on the apron and Cena releases the hold. Miz hits a knee sending Cena to the floor, and Masters locks in the Masterlock. After Cena fades the heels throw him back inside, and Miz covers but Cena gets the rope. Miz whips Cena to the corner, and then hits a clothesline for two. Miz chokes out Cena in the corner, and then stomps him down. Miz whips Cena into the buckle, but charges into a big boot. Cena hits a pair of running shoulderblocks, and delivers a protoplex. Cena goes for the five knuckle shuffle, but Orton pulls down the top rope sending Cena to the floor. Legacy beats on Cena a bit sending him crashing into the ring steps, and then to the barricade. Orton fires Cena back inside, as Dr. Ken gives Miz his cane. Miz goes to blast Cena with the cane, but Cena ducks and delivers the Attitude Adjustment sending Miz to Smackdown at 5:16. And the IWC explodes. Afterward Piven tries to jump off the top rope, but gets caught by Cena who uses him to fight off the heels. Dr. Ken tries to make the save with the cane, but Cena no sells it. Ken tries to make nice, but he gets pressed slammed on to the heels (and it looked like he took a nasty bump on his head). Cena stares down Legacy as we head out.
Winner: John Cena (Pinfall-Attitude Adjustment **)

-Jeremy Piven was an absolute trainwreck, and Dr. Ken was worse. So ignoring all of that the build to Summerfest….errr…Summerslam is lukewarm at best as we've done nothing to make me all that interested in Orton-Cena. The internet, and namely the commenters, are nearly going to crash the site with cries of Cena overcoming the odds again. This time they have a point, but look at the bright side. Miz goes to Smackdown a bigger star than he was before he left ECW, and now we can finally get the Miz-Morrison feud we all want. Most of the IWC will also piss and moan about the inevitable DX reunion, but lets face it, they're over like crazy and far better than Trips on his own. So while this show sucked there are glimmers of hope on the horizon.

Gosh, thanks god....miz finally leave raw

aww.. i like da feud between miz & cena