hope i can have some of your time and read my story

I used to have relationship with a girl,let's call her A
we've been couple for almost half year,yet it feels like very long
we had alot of sweet moments together,which i still remember till now
we broke up after the 6 months of long distance relationship
it was i who mention break up
why?i wouldn't blame anyone except me
being so foolish to follow every of my best friend's advice
let's call him B
we used to be housemate together,we studied at kl
same area but different college
it was then when i'm in relationship with A
B kept telling me bad stuff about her
and at one time,he threaten me with friendship
he said,you forget about your friends when you got a girl already.
In fact i did not
i admit i did some bad stuff to them,as i was always the loser who tried to hard to be in the group of friends
in order to keep this friendship intact(it was 10years of friendship)
i apologize to him,and try to spend more time with my friends
and i neglected A.
soon after that,we had some minor break up
then another friend of mine C
who had feelings toward A try to tackle her during the break up
i did not know until i patch up,when A told me about it
i was furious,really angry about it for i really took C for friends
B and his friends,talk with me.
saying it was A's fault for C to fell for her
indicating that A is using C and try to stir things up
the me back then,i was naive
i thought friendship were everything
i thought they were my true friends
and yet B told me that C is innocent
and i had a major broke up,a big one 2 days before my birthday
we broke up,and i blurted out alot of harsh words
and yet she still gave me my birthday present and even came to find my parents and cried in front of them
i doubted,recalling what my friends told me
i acted cruely
i'm not any good boyfriend either
being in long distance,i'm unable to give her anything
sometimes i would really end up broke while i'm studying in kl
i rarely call her,due to saving my expenses
for this i failed terribly as a bf
she would travel all the way from our hometown to kl just to find me
and yet,i couldn't afford to treat her to a nice meal
or even buy her some shirts or skirts
i was very cheap,way too cheap
having this for one of my reason i kept in mind
i broke up
blurting out harsh word,accusing her for flirting around.
i know that,i'm an ******* for that.it was more than that

soon after that,B betrayed me
having me thought as a dumbf**k,sore loser and naive guy
i knew that,and i really had a major break down
cause all along i thought he was my best buddy

and my thoughts are comin back
i pull myself out of the group,and i know i had lost myself in attempt to join the group
for few months,i constantly have thoughts bout her
thoughts that how bad i am,how cruel i treated her
how cheap i am
been avoiding her since the break up
i couldn;t explain why,but i guess i'm just too ashame to meet her
and i owe her an explaination,why i mention broke up and such
am i pathetic or what
listening to my friends and negelcted what she had done for me

end~

thanks for reading

This post has been edited by yukikaze: Apr 7 2008, 02:54 AM

yes i do admit i am
and i felt like i'm a...dumbf
i wanted to tell her that what ive been keeping
but..does it really matter now?

i don;t even know how to start
face to face?
i for one who's..tear easily to come out
i thought of tru mail or whatsoever
but it's like...not sincere

thanks for taking time to read and even posted some advices for me

nite peoples
i'm off to sleep
college gonna start tomorrow
i'll keep in mind for what you guys had posted here

heh,i am dai 9 sei
i don't hope for anything at all
just that thinking back then,i really do owe her alot things
in sense of being a bf



you're right
i dont deserve anything from her

maybe i'm just too dumb to see who's real friends and who's not
i fell hard,really hard
i cant hope for anythin
but well,at least i'll tell her everything it will be better right?

what you wrote,u got a point
then i think i know what i should do
and btw thanks for landing it hard on me
=)

This post has been edited by yukikaze: Apr 7 2008, 12:59 PM

i'm an a55hole who never appreciate anything

end =)

winning her back is the least i'll do
i'm worst than i am now
friends?
they'll betray me someday
only a few of them are at least true and sincere to me
i rather fall even harder than i am now
at least i would know what's missing

well to you,i might be trying to get some attention
in fact was trying to be nice asking advices and help from the forumer here

=)

---

Added on April 7, 2008, 4:56 pmwell to you,i might be trying to get some attention
in fact was trying to be nice asking advices and help from the forumer here

=)

This post has been edited by yukikaze: Apr 7 2008, 04:56 PM

how i wish i'm in some tvb series
but thats not gonna happen

received a message yesterday nite
it seems.....like she sent wrong message
saying that she got someone already....
and i told her everything and i wish her have a happy life with her new half....

---

Added on April 27, 2008, 5:41 pmso sour hahahahahahhahaa

This post has been edited by yukikaze: Apr 27 2008, 05:41 PM

goodbye cruel world...
































just kiddin
cymon got a point,no use looking at the back have to pick myself up