Sep 29 2025, 04:03 PM
QUOTE(Fabrication @ Sep 28 2025, 07:28 PM)
40, male here. Stable job, stable and good income, dated before but no sexual experience. Not a moral stance. it’s just how life unfolded.
Lately I get labeled “immature” because my mindset is pretty youthful.
With women closer to my age (mid-30s to mid-40s), things often feel complicated—everyone’s carrying history and sometimes it drifts into a transactional vibe.
With women a bit younger (mid-20s to mid-30s), I’ve noticed early career success can come with quick character judgments.
With women in their early 20s, I actually find it easier to connect. It’s not about “taking advantage”, I’m looking for a long-term, committed relationship. Being older makes me want to show up steady, respectful, and protective so we can build something simple and good.
Is this just me? Do I need to present myself differently? Any tips from people who’ve navigated:
Being 40+ with no sexual history
Getting misread as “immature” when you’re just upbeat/young-at-heart
Bridging different life stages without it feeling transactional
Posting this partly because modern dating is absurdly funny :confused:
also genuinely curious what others think. Roast me or coach me
TL;DR: 40, Male, no sexual history, young vibe. Same-age dating feels complex, early-20s adults feel easier to connect with. How do I avoid the “immature” label and find the right fit for a long-term relationship?
I also have zero sexual experience. For me I focus solely on my non negotiable before anything else. These are traits that I want in a woman. Without these traits, there is no second look/date no matter how hot she is.Lately I get labeled “immature” because my mindset is pretty youthful.
With women closer to my age (mid-30s to mid-40s), things often feel complicated—everyone’s carrying history and sometimes it drifts into a transactional vibe.
With women a bit younger (mid-20s to mid-30s), I’ve noticed early career success can come with quick character judgments.
With women in their early 20s, I actually find it easier to connect. It’s not about “taking advantage”, I’m looking for a long-term, committed relationship. Being older makes me want to show up steady, respectful, and protective so we can build something simple and good.
Is this just me? Do I need to present myself differently? Any tips from people who’ve navigated:
Being 40+ with no sexual history
Getting misread as “immature” when you’re just upbeat/young-at-heart
Bridging different life stages without it feeling transactional
Posting this partly because modern dating is absurdly funny :confused:
also genuinely curious what others think. Roast me or coach me
TL;DR: 40, Male, no sexual history, young vibe. Same-age dating feels complex, early-20s adults feel easier to connect with. How do I avoid the “immature” label and find the right fit for a long-term relationship?
If you are introvert like me, then your only options would be dating app (I recommend CMB but make sure to pay for it) or speed dating or both. I use CMB and found my soon to be wife. Speed dating I went once only cause per session it's like RM150.
Make sure the woman have what you want before continuing. Be firm on this. Go out talk with them.
This post has been edited by Ramjade: Sep 29 2025, 05:11 PM
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