When friends asked me how my bf and I got together, I always start with my story...


So yeah I technically didn't ask him out, but I asked him to ask me out from then onwards, he did the chasing and eventual confession.

Before that, I confessed to two guys and was rejected both times. In hindsight, one was bad timing, and another was bad times. It hurt a lot to be rejected, but I learned a lot and I'm glad I did and came out of it.

I eventually went to dating apps and made a lot of moves myself. I would ask men out on dating apps after I decided I want to get to know them better. If things went well then I make sure there's a next round. For example, I'd just talk about some upcoming events or interesting places and ask to go with them. Funny thing is, there was once I wanted to watch an online concert with a Japanese dude and asked if he'd be open for me to go to his house to watch together. He declined me and said really weird things with his bad English, can't remember what exactly but I recalled snapping because I understood his reaction that he thought I wanted to bed him. I was genuinely just interested to find a friend to enjoy the concert together and took offense to that so I cut ties lol.

So yeah, I don't see anything wrong with ladies making the moves, but of course it really depends on individual personalities, experiences, circumstances and nuances. For example,
- I decide my own timing when to meet with an online stranger, which meant a lot of declination or deferment (for those that had potential).
- ultimately, I was really lucky they didn't take advantage of me lol. I just have a thing for good people I guess