Based on your description, isn't it apparent that you're being facilitated as plan B?

Can see you're being transparent by didn't even bother to create dupe ID to post this, therefore, I'd be honest with you. If I were you, being used as plan B, I'll return the favor treating 2nd person as plan B too, or if I have to be diabolic a bit, you could have already guessed it.

Many better options out there, doesn't it? It's best not to allow yourself manipulated by the feelings.

When a person with this attitude, you think you'd want this as your lifelong partner? You decision to make.

You don’t correct a person with a different level of awareness; it will backfire.
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Truthful words are unpleasant; pleasant words are not truthful. The one coming next is unpleasant:

1) Are you so desperate that you need to be entangled with the late 40s woman with a juvenile mentality?

2) We never met.
Words can be deceiving; emotions can be fabricated; videos can be faked. Trust none of it until you meet face to face. Until that happens, all the words, voice recordings, and video recordings carry 0 reliability.

3) She knows I have feelings for her. Made me think.
Even if you guessed it right , what is next ? Even if you guessed it wrong , what is next? Does the thinking solve the issue ? If not, stop wasting the effort. She stated it clearly; you are just her BFF, and she got a BF.

“Women don’t like men to 'fix' their problems”.

She is happy with the problem. Stop interfering. That is her own cause and effect to be faced by herself.

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What should you do? It is an easy decision - cut.

If your feeling to her is real based on my experience even stop communicating and you will still cannot move on but of course ours is difference. You just chat online while mine already have sex few times plus dating.

TS, I fear you may be falling into a mental trap thinking you can be her "hero". From what I read, she has no intentions of changing and does not want your help, so your good intentions will be wasted.

You cannot help someone who does not want to be helped, so plan your exit lah. Any further "but I love her..." will only kill you slowly. Good luck and hope you find your love again.

Somemore she have kids both 5 and 7. Well kinda expect thing not go smoothly and maybe she her feeling to me is short live since. Can feel it from her chat later on

Not easy to move on if you found someone that feel compatible with. If you read my last two post you know i still cannot. Not sure if can or not

If you feel nothing then her to you its just another person you meet and talk to. No feeling involve in first place, more like a friend

TS haven't met her?

You don't even know how she looks like.

For all you know could be a guy behind the phone.

walk away.

Did you read what you wrote?

Think again.

She sounds very toxic.

Walk away.

sorry, i didnt read the whole story but i had a quick read.

1. the moment you asked the question "stay or walk away", you have subconsciously want to walk away but you just need people to reassure your decision and normally subconscious will not lie because that is your mind wants. so if the question arises, just walk away. If you do not feel like walk away, you will never have this question before. Just like when you are full, you wont ask yourself if i want to eat or not.

2. All those caring things she did, like asking your wellbeing, share picture of the lunch/dinner she ate, in a relationship, those gestures are just sub-point, not a main point, so in shorts, it means nothing. it is just something people do when in r/s but enough to justify whether to stay or to walk away. i was in your position before where we greeted good morning every day, check wellbeing, etc... but in the end we broke up also.

3. if you feel she is toxic, walk away immediately, dont wait. toxic relationship is like toxic gas being released into the air, dont wait for it to pass and assume it will be ok once it passes. the problem is by the time the toxic gas is gone, you are probably dead already. never dwell or question yourself when a r/s is toxic, a toxic relationship is hard to be recovered, once toxic gas is inside the body, it is hard to get out.

i was in a toxic relationship before and people around me told it is toxic and asked me to break but i thought i know better and just continue. in the end, it is really so toxic that the girl twisted the story behind my back. she tells all people that i know how i treated her so badly but she didnt mention what she did in the first place. she is overly-sensitive girl and some words she will get triggered badly and she will feel you are scolding her.

so, i would rather be single than be in toxic relationship.

Looks like a textationship.

It's not healthy if you are looking for a genuine relationship.