I'll put forward a very ruthless option.

Raising children has the biological time constraint vs raising a dog (has no biological time constraint)

There should the sequence of priority in life. If the dog(pet) has higher priority than the husband or kids, this kind of woman should be left to spend their life with their dog. Let her remember the divorce in her life is caused by a dog. A simple and straight forward option. There is no need to bring other element into discussion.

After the sequence of priority is correct, raising the children has taken the place, both of you have more leisure of time for the pet(dog) in future, that time it is still not too late let her have the dog again.

Hence, in between the dog & divorce - let the wife decide on the agreed date. If she choose the dog on the dateline, execute the divorce procedure without emotion. If she choose husband & kids over the dog, find the dog a new owner.

This post has been edited by nihility: Dec 6 2024, 11:10 AM

Put 1 more question to her. Ask if the dog is to mask her intention not to have kids? See if she is hiding this under the carpet all these while.

She doesn't want the children. That is my deduction.

Someone who want the children, will find way to make it happens. Someone who does not want the children, will find the excuses not to have them.

TS, if you don”t mind , what is the enviroment of the wife growing up?

The parent in laws behaviour ? The wife”s sibling characters ?

It only means that the blind spot / “land mine” in relationship is inevitable. Very heartache to know the partner gave up/ change direction half-way after into the marriage. Both male & female also have similar version of their stories.

During your separation period, give sufficient cool off period for 2 off you. Maybe a miracle can happens or some ppl can knock some sense into her logically.

I have heard the male lost his marriage to another male - very common.
I have heard the male lost his marriage to another lesbian - that was very unusual.
Now I heard a male that lost his marriage to a dog. I”m totally speechless.

The info "Additional info - I'm a man with no bad habits, typical house-husband type that does all the housework. So i do not think my wife attitude change cos of some bad from me. Just FYI."

The last 10 years knowing each another, did the two (2) of you go into any major fight(s) or argument(s) before the marriage?

There are 2 types of fights, namely:-

1)Positive fight / argument, both of you will find a middle ground to compromise / move forward.
2)Negative fight/ argument, always 1 side gave in & the other side never compromise / the issue left suspended without any solution.

The fight, the couple should treat is as the limit "chart" of their partner. It is just like a Hooke's Law for the spring elasticity, you can stretch the spring within the limit of elasticity without damaging the spring. The distortion of the spring will always go back to its original form. However, when the elasticity limit is breached (point of deformation), the spring will never ever be able to return to its original state.

It is human nature to push this limits, we always try to test the limit of the tolerance of our partner. The fight in relationship is the indication when the relationship's limit is being approached. When the fight occurs, if the couple reacts positively, something need to be done to avoid the spring from going into "failure point". If nothing is being done, the failure point will be certainly be breached.

Has any form of fight(s) take place before ? Or did you hide your protest(s) under the carpet / never let her know your limits of tolerance all these while? Is this your first time going into major disagreement / fight ?

Just do nothing for now until the condition suitable to talk. See one step, take one step. May you overcome this soon.

I gained some hidden profound from your post. Thank you.

Yes, it need to be attended by both husband & wife from the information I heard. No harm trying out but do have some preparation, in case if your wife are not willing to participate or open up during the session.