the 2 friends are not abusive people.

the issue is that they are door mat to their wives.

I don't see their wives as being physically abusive, just that they suck their finances dry and do not contribute much as a wife.

I hope I am wrong, but till today, I am still puzzled as to how these friends fell in love with their wives in the first place.

Even when I have had the opportunity to mix with them, I notice their wives don't social or speak much.

sorry to hear the stories...pretty sadding.

This post has been edited by nickykee: Nov 25 2024, 10:45 AM

stockholm syndrome

i still confuse on the 2nd case, why he can leave the 1st wife which helps the family bring in more income and help ease the financial difficulty...
maybe there is alot more behind the scene? hope is not just ego issue.

the first one memang "i can fix her" syndrome.

cannot feel sorry for him. his choice his karma. adult enough to know what he is doing, unless he got black magic or something.

You're looking at it the wrong way

Its not so much that they become doormat, then become blind. They just don't know any better because they were never taught it in the first place. A person who has never experienced real love, does not know what real love looks like.

Lets try to see it another way. Look at people who smoke and drink alot of alcohol. If they grew up in a culture surrounded by people that such behaviour is normal, then they would also follow it. It would make them feel safe by engaging in such behaviours because its what they grew up around, its familiar. How you try to change their mind also won't work, normally have the opposite effect as they get more defensive when confronted. They somehow need to come to the realization themself. Your job as a friend is just to plant seeds and be around when they come to realization and need the support.


You are right above the environment and how to break out of it.

However need to point out that its not really a gene problem. Genes only give you a pre-disposition towards a certain area, its the environment that dictates what genes get expressed. In all of us, we have genes for different types of behaviours, good environment will bring out the good parts, bad environment will bring out the bad ones.

Princess syndrome quite common among girls gen z …

1st wife left him

1st wife left him, because she is more successful than him.

she can even support the 2 kids without his income.

n emasculated men trending… (a lot of girls hate it actually… )

This post has been edited by TiramisuCoffee: Nov 25 2024, 11:40 AM

yes they both are very defensive.

But for the second friend, I feel even more sorry for him.

The way I see it, its better to be single than to have a money sucking wife that don't care about you.

Really? Have not met any. But I guess with growing number of karens, its is very likely.
Suspect the parents have to be quite rich to feed kids to become a prick.

i thought spouse suppose to support each other...but sad to hear this.

be single better

I do have one friend who migrated to Australia.

Wife working but he stay at home as house husband take care of kids.

how about this ? is this paradise to you?

edited: not my place to say anything...as long the person and the family happy doing it. life too short, hope ur friends find happiness.

This post has been edited by nickykee: Nov 25 2024, 03:34 PM

complicated

may your friends find happiness !

This post has been edited by Chrono-Trigger: Nov 25 2024, 03:06 PM

the 1st friend still ok ok, because he is very smart and earn high salary

2nd friend, very suffer, he is now almost penniless but still stick with the new wife. I don't know how he survive, but he go dating then spend a bomb but don't stay overnight with new wife and her step children, instead he goes back to his house.

I hope so too

THIS