I'm okay with opposing views as long as there's some rationale there. Quite open-minded because I used to teach debate and argumentative writing skills.

Ah I see... no wonder you're sharp since you're into detective stories. I haven't watched that Oppenheimer movie yet; heard it was thought-provoking though.

Regarding NLP, I mostly use it for work and business, e.g. coaching, training, presenting, closing deals. For personal interaction, I mainly use a bit to understand the person in a short time + read body language (also trained in this). I learn all these as part of my profession + my academic background + for biz purpose.

Thanks for your kind wishes. ^^ I often get asked to write all my stories and insights into books; will do so when I can commit to it.

hahaha yeah, probably. I'm an old soul in a young body; quite a deviant in terms of thoughts and perspectives.

I know my divine calling long ago, and I'm blessed with spiritual abilities. Combined with my intellect and personality, I have helped a lot of people whenever they allow me to.

As for that man you mentioned... I suspect it's that analyst guy (si mangkuk) I previously mentioned in the "Confusing Male Behaviour" thread.

He's quite spiritual, posted all the Buddhist quotes about doing good to mankind, serve others etc. His job (non-NGO) is also kinda related to peace-making and humanity on a global scale, say we must be the positive force to change the societies, etc.

OK just to give a bit more updates...


Lastly, thanks for your compliment and encouragement. It is a strong reaffirmation for me. ❤️ I always feel I am born and built for such a man, just that I don't know for sure who he is yet. Such a man is truly rare and God-given. 🙏🏻


This post has been edited by Ralna: Oct 30 2024, 05:24 AM

Haha yeah, in a way... but it was him who pursued me first... and then lost his heart... 🤭 hehe

No, I haven't heard of Leil Lowndes before, but since you mentioned, I'll just find out more.

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As for MBTI, I'd say maximise your strengths and find alternatives to utilise your weakness. In my own case, I'm an INFJ, so I can't change my Introversion. I can learn to be sociable and outgoing to a certain extent (which makes me look like an extrovert), but at the end of the day, my energy still gets super drained until I need a few days to recharge.

This has been disadvantageous for me in doing business because I can't network, attend events nor have as many meetings as I'd like to. However, my limited social energy is also good in a way that it forces me to revamp my business model and leverage on systems and manpower as much as possible, which gradually turns my self-employment to an independent business, and frees up more of my time and energy.

As for my Feelings (F), this is how I predominantly operate using my right brain. However, at work or in business, I need to be extra cautious and mindful of how I should hide or display my feelings so that I won't be manipulated by others for their own gains. I often do this by putting up the façade of Thinking (T) and forcing myself to use my strategic, logical and mathematical brain. It's not natural for me, but I can still do it (with intensive processing from the left brain and total mindfulness from the right brain) and make highly rational biz decisions that align with my core values and future direction.

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For INTJ, based on my knowledge and interactions with them (several males), sometimes I feel they're in their head too much and overthink until analysis paralysis. It's good to think deeply but too much analysis on even a small thing or a simple decision can lead to a waste of mental power and time. I feel their mental energy can be better spent on things that truly matter and can create larger impact.

Another shortcoming is probably overly logical until they're not aware of other people's emotions. For example, in the case of running a marketing campaign, INFJ would be able to consider both logical and emotional aspects of marketing and create something effective that feels good for the company and the target audience. For INTJ, they may be preoccupied with the logical and measurable aspects, such as numbers, methods and measurable outcomes, but not so much on the emotional engagement with the target audience. In terms of interpersonal relationships, INTJ can be quite aloof, which may cause some issues if their partners want more emotional warmth and expression but aren't getting any/much.



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My awakening comes in phases, with the first one starting at 15 years old when my first perception of the world collapsed. Over the years, different parts/domains of me gradually awakened through triggers and stressors that forced me to introspect, evolve and breakthrough. After many rounds of shedding tears and skins/ facades, I'm currently at version 7.

With each awakening (or rather, reprogramming), I see the world and its people in a different light and lens, and I think and behave differently as well. Quite an interesting experience although painful to go through at first. Numbing or suppressing or ignoring won't do any good at all. I have learned not to resist the pain of change but rather embrace it and work through it more quickly and efficiently, and in hindsight, I often thank God for the blessings in disguise. ^^

This post has been edited by Ralna: Nov 10 2024, 06:21 AM

I'll answer the 3 questions/points above.

1. In business, it would be impulsive and reckless to sign any deal first and worry about the profit/loss later. Business is not always 100% within our control, and it's highly susceptible to external factors and changes in the economic, political and social climate. Any deal, before signing, should have been at least analysed with SWOT + risk management and risk mitigation in place, so that if any loss occurs, there will be another revenue-making plan or sales pipeline to make it up.

For example, I was recently approached by a USA company to become their Authorized Business Partner in Malaysia, and while they are super eager to get me on board and I personally like their product and offering, I still have to take it slow and get my corporate lawyer (ex) and my business contact (cousin) to totally analyse their proposal and legal contract. Both of them have more than 20 years of experience in their field, and they came back to me with at least 20 questions or key concerns for me to iron out with the USA company. I'm also getting a family contact based in the USA to do some background checks on the company. This is the due diligence that I do before I sign anything.

So far, I have not suffered from any loss in doing biz, and I do not have any clients who owe me money. I don't like financial and legal headaches. If I'm running an MNC, any decision as a CEO will affect thousands or tens of thousands of employees under my leadership. Any loss suffered by the company that is not recouped will eventually lead to cost-cutting measures and employee layoffs in the long-term. I hate seeing this happen because if I am responsible for employees' livelihood (especially breadwinners, with young or old dependants), I will want to make sure I can provide a secure job and environment, and not break that trust my employees have on me.

Hence, signing a deal but only to worry about it later... is really not my cup of tea. I feel it's too desperate and reckless.


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2) I went through 6 rounds to become my current version 7.

Not all are life crises:



The First to Fifth round was highly turbulent, and I often asked God why let me go through this. I found a rather complete answer from Buddhism/Taoism:



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3) There's a term for what you experienced. In his book, The Code of the Extraordinary Mind, Vishen Lakhiani refers to these moments of upheaval as “The Beautiful Destruction”.

It’s a period where we encounter chaos, massive struggle, and what could seem like the dissolution of everything certain in our life. However, this eventually becomes a clearing out of what is merely good or no longer serving our highest self so something greater can be ushered in. Quoting his words, "Sometimes the Universe has to destroy a part of your life to allow the next great thing to enter."

Personally, after going through so much in life at a young age, I have come to a state of mind and heart where I no longer resist the pain; instead, I allow myself to be broken, knowing that I will be rebuilt anew.

Renowned Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung once said, "What you resist, persists; what you accept, dissolves."

Meaning that whatever we resist, we attract more of it towards us. He asserted that when we resist anything in our lives, we try to think about it all the time to either avoid or expel it from our existence; in the process, we entice more pain and suffering for battling the resistance that keeps building. Also, when we resist, we enable things to persist because we tend to focus on what we don’t want in our lives and attract more of it. However, when we acknowledge the resistance and embrace it by consciously accepting it, we dissolve the inevitable pain.

In the field of new age psychology, this is called doing your shadow work so that you can embrace your inner light, and elevate your level of consciousness to vibrate at higher energy and frequency. Not all humans want to nor are capable of such spiritual ascension, but those who do will find themselves more in-tune to higher power and the universe flow, for the greater good of humankind.

I think it's quite deep for most people to understand here; just mentioning these points for you to reflect further and help you make sense of what you're going through. You probably have a higher calling to heed if you open yourself to it.

This post has been edited by Ralna: Nov 11 2024, 08:25 PM

Good point.

For me, I still see myself as an Introvert because of how my brain is wired. One of the main differences between introverted and extroverted brains is how they respond to the neurotransmitter dopamine.



I look at my dominant, instinctive response or preference under different triggers, stressors and environments to identify accurately what's my MBTI type.

Say, out of 10 times or 100 times, how many times I behave like an I or E | S or N | T or F | J or P. If 80% of the time, I behave like an Introvert, then I am an Introvert by nature. If I hate mess all the time and dislike changes and spontaneity, then I am highly J.

On a side note, those personality tests act as guides to understand ourselves better, and shouldn't be labels. I believe in the Pareto principle (80-20 rule), means we have fixed traits (default mode) but are also adaptable to changes (stimuli-response), and are capable of evolving to multi-facets of ourselves.

Will try the Big5 test that you mentioned. Thanks for recommending it.

This post has been edited by Ralna: Nov 11 2024, 06:45 PM

1. Yeah, because I use both my left and right brain. For business, left brain dominates. For relationship, right brain dominates. I do well in science and math, but I'm also good at art and music.

I did a test before, my result is 50-50, which means I use both brains equally. Most men are 70-80% left-brained, and 20-30% right.

2. Thanks. It was tough at first, but now I can see the benefits.



3. Yes, unlearn and relearn for mindset breakthroughs. This world is huge. By wearing different hats and seeing through different lens, you'll get to see the beauty in life despite the fallen state the world is in.

Glad to have exchanged deeper thoughts with you. The pleasure is mine too.

This post has been edited by Ralna: Nov 11 2024, 09:58 PM