and moneywise is another thing, buyer dont dare to pay first before name transfer and i dont dare to transfer name before payment.

Once I challenged my tinting guy since they claim their tinting is 100% JPJ compliant, if kena saman, bring them the saman and they will settle.
Then I asked since JPJ can pass, Puspakom should be OK also. They told me, Puspakom more strict, they offer to remove tinting for free when I sell my car next time.
Cos chances of failed inspection very high if got tinting, waste time and money only just to proof your tinting can pass Puspakom.
Nowadays also got shops offering 'bare windows rental'. Bring to shop, they swap the glass, you bring to Puspakom/JPJ. Once approved and get inspection report, bring back to reinstall your windows with tinting.

nope, you can handle it directly yourself with the bank loan officer and no need to pay "processing fee" of those stealers.. i mean dealers 
Did it for 3 cars already. Don't even need to personally meet up, can just email everything, except for sign loan docs, that one meet up easier.
Yes, for sure boleh.

Between seller & buyer, agree on the payment method before hand.

Bankers cheque:
Safest, as the funds HAVE to exist & paid to the bank, then the bank issues the cheque to the named/buyer. Thus from buyer perspective, its confirmed funds available unlike personal cheque. But some not so up-to-date people dont even know this exist, so as seller, they also not aware. Then you can ask them go inquire with their bank of choice about what is a bankers cheque.

If cash:
Agree on a meeting place, prefer bank ATM as immediately deposit into machine. However due to this being a manual & not immediate process, both party need agree this is done before or after JPJ.
Actual experience:
a) Buyer gave cash at ATM, I deposit into ATM. I give him keys & reg card immediately, so as seller I have the $, and as buyer took the valued property (altho from eyes of the insurer, you willingly gave your keys & property to others). I immediately go JPJ while he drives back to his state, once I thumbprint, I give him the slip and he can complete the transfer at any JPJ within 7 days. New owner details need match with what seller gave at form.
b) Buyer gave cash, I was surprised as back then I assumed he meant bank trx, never the less, we counted the cash in Tesco(?) at gombak IIRC... this was 2007-2009. As buyer he confident can do JPJ with runner (this was before thumbprint, just isi form last time) without me there.
c) Most recent, bought a vehile from foreign national, now this cant be done at UTC, must be JPJ branch. I upped my online limit, daily limit, FPX limit & ATM limit.....but somehow someway the damn bank still enforce the default limit. At this time I had to explain to seller, I am sorry I have the proof that credit increased but bank side dont reflect. We agreed, while in line at JPJ, we do first. He keeps the keys & reg card & car. We meet at closest bank to take out $ over the counter.
d) A fisherman's son came from Kedah to purchase my car on Sunday, I assuemed he will look at car Sunday, then Monday we go puspakom/JPJ la. Mana tau, we meet at restaurant, he have not even seen the car with his eyes, he already gave me cash in his bag. I was taken a back, I told him come lets see the car first, he was satisfied, we go Maybank bandar baru ampang & took the $. He drove back to Kedah. The car was KP plate anyway, I believe its Kedah plate?....not sure. It was an restomoded 80's car. Each nut & bolt changed, chassis full antirust done.

Bank transfer:
Easiest, just before your turn at the counter, trx the $.

Personally, as seller I will want get $ first, so I make it easy for buyer I portray & give them all the confidence in the car, they can test & even bring family/foreman come see.

The MPV I sold, he brough his friend & they did the famous unreel the seat belts to see signs of water/flood. I told him if he knows, then I will also know & I will clean it. Instead I lifted the big carpet, till can see chassis, I told him look how dusty it is... if flooded, it will be sqeeky clean haha.