Reaching out to /k, many of whom are from all walks of life, very experienced and seen all there is to see in their corporate careers. Seeking advice and whether similar experiences have been encountered by more worldly, wiser heads than mine.

For 8 years I was in a stable MNC job in KL -- final base salary of ~RM40k, generous benefits, consistently 40 hour work week and rarely more. I was well-liked by my superior (the CEO), and I had a group of colleagues who became my friends who I also met outside office hours, which I regard as the high watermark for workplace friendship. 2 years ago due to various internal movements (i.e. some senior people left) I was earmarked as a potential future Country Head and things were looking rosy, though of course nothing was committed at these senior positions.

In early 2021, two things happened. The company had a change in ownership so the CEO was replaced, followed by some other changes in management. But my job remained unaffected, and the wider scope I was promised was still on the table for me. Around the same time I received a job offer from SG, offering $20k+ base. This was out of the blue given my age (early 40s), so I took this offer and moved over with my family (primary school children). I could say it was driven by personal reasons (for children future etc.), but to be honest I had no problem staying in KL my hometown.

12 months later, I find myself unable to move on from my previous job. This SG job has been great, after some initial challenges I have started to settle in. And moreover SG has been an easy place to adapt to. So I should have no complaints.

But I still think about my previous job. 12 months on I am still closer to my ex-colleagues in KL than my current colleagues in SG. I see my peers in other companies moving up and taking very senior positions in Malaysia, and constantly look back on what could have been had I stayed. I appreciate with new ownership and management things may not have been that great for me in the same company, but still I look back with rose-tinted glasses. The corporate setup in SG is such that there are many layers of management compared to in KL, so there is little chance for promotion within the next 5 years or more. It would also be tough to move back due to children's schooling, etc., and anyway my previous job has been filled.

Have you ever regretted moving on from your old job? How long before you got over it, or do you ever get over it?

Yes, regretted before, but, life got to move on.

Well... U are struggling because u keep looking back. Why not try the other way round? Think of the future, staying in SG ur son get better education, he would have brighter future and career, think of your retirement life, getting better paid now and u could enjoy your later stage. Live in something make u feel good in the future instead, not the pass.

You like ur ex-colleague, u could still keep in touch with them. My current job is pretty boring compare to my ex-company, my colleague rarely talk to each other except lunch time and work related stuff. My ex-company is more energetic and happening, we hang out together after work on Friday, most of us have leave therenow, but we still keep in touch with each other, we still chitchat in our own fb/whatsapp group, some memory is great, but life always move on =)

This post has been edited by ragk: Aug 29 2022, 01:54 PM

Good things rarely stay forever. It's common when people move, they will reminisce all the good things experienced/ going to be.

In sg, mys are generally slightly discriminated compared to their own citizen. I rarely heard my climbed far into the exco/ senior role. You will still have a very high floor at sg though the cap will be limited due to citizenship perception.

Whoa feels like moving back to stay with your ex wife or ex gf.

Move on lah...

Move forward

Forget the past.

Yup, wish I could but dunno how to.

12 months ago -- they have since filled the position through a (cheaper) internal promotion...

Very good advice, tq. Just at the moment cannot see/appreciate the benefits clearly, maybe it's temporary but maybe it's not?
And I think my situation same as yours re ex-colleagues vs. current....

Did you feel this way in your career too? Good things end it's true but it's easier to get over if it's outside your own control, no?
There are some CEOs who are Malaysian-born (i.e. ex-Malaysian), but yes I agree with you. In general, competition is stiffer here, basically talents from all over are attracted to work in SG so it also gets harder to rise to the very top of the tree. Anyway, the very top is only for the cream, not somewhere I think I can make it to...

yup very much like this, esp an ex-wife/ex-gf you left by your own choice.

True but would probably re-enrol in a govt/vernacular school in KL. I also schooled this way, happy with my experiences there

with that salary what is there to regret?

to be honest, i had similar experience like you, till today, when i look back (I do keep in touch with ex-colleague via social media, coz we all from different region/ countries, but same role), I do envy them, wish to turn back the clock where I am sure I am comfortable there, but being young and ambitious that time, i decided to take a leap to unknown.

Want to called it regret, well, you can say so. But, what I know I will never able to turn back the clock. My role had been filled, and I even interview plus handover to the person, and the person till now sitting comfortable in the role, not moving

btw, i already left the company more than 5 years ago, but, till now after few subsequent move, nothing compare to the co

Dont think your children can enter govt or vernakular school...im not sure but the syllabus will be very different...realitistically will your child even excel in mandarin syllabus offered by uec or malay syllabus like spm/sptm?

Think carefully

Where u now? In sg?

Ya sometimes career move may not be good. Can even be worst. Yea yea people say sgd high per capita, high currency and good education what not, but these figures dont necessarily translate to better physiology well being... i have been through it myself and I know...

This post has been edited by CoolStoryWriter: Aug 31 2022, 12:07 PM

At 40 yrs old I would be worried about my job security first rather than promotion

First and foremost, ask yourself if u can last 5 yrs in the company

Then only think about how to strategize your promotion

yeah with the superior Spore o level education, I would be relishing.

Instead of paying higher exhorbitant prices to send our kids to international private schools.

I seriously wondering what is TS's complain ?

What is so nice about Msia life ? Everyday read news songlap here and there. Court here n there. My head also pening. If I live elsewhere I don't have to read all this.

Aside from missing our family ie our parents and siblings ?

Is TS an introvert? with such income, you can anytime look for new entertainments, friends, lifestyle that make yourself happy. Or try to venture into entrepreneurship if you are keen and love to challenge yourself

Couldnt better the comments above. What surprises me was the ‘personal’ reason for the career change and significant adjustment. Children education is just too convenient to take the leap of faith and could easily backfire with the omnipresent intensity in SG.

Nope, but, what i realised now is every career move is actually a gamble to the unknown, you can win or you can lose. And, you compensate that with increment.

Thank u. I appreciate your sharing, I suppose just need to appreciate the good times for what they are, and be thankful we were lucky enough to experience them.

Private edu is a possible avenue. But I appreciate la that having children adjust again within the space of one year can't be good for their development. Another reason why hard to move back. Are you in SG? Was it a tough move?


fair point, but i subscribe to saying that "if we don't move forward we end up moving backward". So in any new job I try to think of the next step at the start, if there is pathway to somewhere else then it makes me perform better. The alternative of aspiring to stay in the same position for x years is scary to me, but each person has their own approach

ok i accept ur point. On kids education i really dunno, as i feel that the edu pathway in SG is quite uncertain, very dependent on own kids' ability. in Msia, more certainty and options to ensure ur kid has a good degree.
But on politics, i give u a counter-argument -- that songlap news doesn't affect our lives as much as we think. I used to think so too, always read news get upset here and there. But end of the day, it didn't really affect my day-to-day life, or maybe i just cannot see it yet.

Yes I am, with very few hobbies and social life. I define myself by my career, hence ex-colleagues being big part of my KL life.

true. but when weighing things up to decide whether to move, usually the topic of children's future comes up and carries big weight in decision. and ppl usually come to the conclusion that it's better in SG. I did too, but can't remember exactly why. maybe i was swayed by domestic news and stuff like that at the time

yes, it may sound cringy, be thankful for the experience, be it good or bad, as every experience taught you lesson, make you grow

Wah your old job sounds great. Mind sharing the name of the company or at least the industry/job, TS?



As for advice, I think everyone here already said what needs to be said.