I was always skeptical about dating apps, not that I met any scammers yet, but I've heard horror stories.
But having seen some professionals here preaching about going casual, my surrounding friends also sharing their good news using it, I find their experiences interesting, maybe I should explore this part of myself and give it a go, and set myself a timeline and quit if the venture is not fruitful, here goes!

First of all I only swipe "verified" users.

First two days was kind of Meh, I matched with a lot of girls, I will initiate chat with those I find it desirable, here is the breakdown:

60% of them got no response
20% of them got response but they kill the conversation.
20% of them texted me first, but you guessed it, they look undesirable.

One of them is just... I am speechless.
"I am a teacher so I work a lot, and there is no off day, I love to work and I hate holidays." - This is what she wrote, of course she did not wrote them in one go, in between I have replies, basically I am trying to ask her out, this is what I usually do in this app, I do not waste too much time chatting. What is the point of her using dating app if she behaves like this? She looks like Indian but I gave it a shot as I can see she took care of her shape well, but the interaction put me off a lot.

Just when I am about to throw in the towel and give up, things finally got interesting.
I matched a total of 2 quality girls. They looked very desirable physically, and agreed to my invitation easily.

One of them share lots of common interest with me, we even played the same Playstation game! <age 21>
Another one is like a perfect copy of me, thinks very rationally like a man, direct, no sugarcoat, and prefers call over text, we had calls for 3 nights ever since. <age 24>

Going to meet them this weekend, one on Sat, another on Sun.
My expectation was very pessimistic, getting 2 good ones in a week definitely exceeded my expectations, hope the dates will go well.
I felt that, it doesn't need a lot of matches, those are just numbers and they are not meaningful, most just matched and do nothing, just a handful of good quality ones is enough to occupy you, meanwhile I will still be continue swiping to see if I can get more of these matches.

Will update here after the events happened.

This post has been edited by AshenOne: May 25 2024, 02:18 PM

I understand, girl A has long hour work schedule, work 7 days a week, only night available, and she told me she is too tired to do anything but to lay down at home, even given up watching her favourite youtubers to kill time. Her "off day" is on Sun which is just means can leave earlier from work, and she chose to give that precious time to me, regardless I felt good about this.

Another one girl B, she outright told me she is meeting her matches too, she is not hiding anything, I am impressed by her straightforwardness.
She did mentioned none lasted long enough to enter a real relationship, at most just meet once or few times then go separate ways.
I wonder if anything more will happen between us? I am about to find out soon.

Yes quite a number of them have attitude problems.

Seen some profile bio stating "do not text me if you do not have interesting opening conversation, do not talk about work, do not this, do not that...." Then what do you expect us to do?

Another one's bio is "I will not make any effort to reconcile if you piss me off".

Then some of them reply just for the sake of replying, they will not stop replying, but each of their reply is a dead end reply and you need to keep making things interesting, feels extremely one sided.

Sometimes I wonder, what is wrong with them? Can't just behave normally or decently? No one is owing anyone anything...

"Useful" means the girl is just using them for mundane errands but the guy is not getting anything meaningful? Or do you mean they're using the guys for bed? If it is the former, that is called Simp.

I feel you, the chat just feels abnormal in some cases, the decent ones are in the minority, not many but they are there, still able to be found if you just keep swiping.

Concluded the date for today, here goes!

While waiting for us to be seated and served, we were standing outside of the restaurant, queuing with other people. I noticed she was facing the other side while we were talking, her foot was pointed at other direction instead of me, eye contact is quite minimal, this can only mean 2 possibilities, either she is not interested or she is a bit shy, because I experienced both situation before, when I see the girl I liked a lot, I tend to not be able to hold eye contact and may face the other direction while talking, also I may do the same when the other person is irritating, so I cannot make a definitive comment on this behavior of hers.

Once seated we were quite okay at holding conversations. Both of us never looked at phone, both share the same thinking that it is a form of respect to the other party by doing so. Nothing too extraordinary, overall experience quite platonic. She also revealed that she's towards the conservative type, and only had 1 relationship so far. Seems legit, but I am a skeptical person and would only take her words as grain of salt.

As mentioned, overall experience is somewhere in the middle, so I decided to not go for next destination and sent her back home after the dine-in. She left a letter and a chocolate in my car right before she left my car, she didn't gift this directly to me, I was not aware of this until I reached home and found the gifts she left behind for me.

I am usually a more pessimistic person, I flipped a coin, landed in tails, so I was going to assume the letter will be saying "Let's just be friends" those kind of words. Once I opened it, the content written in it was saying it's nice to meet me and hope I enjoy the chocolate, ended with an emoji.

I guess it's kind of a good ending? The ball is in my park now, whether I want to continue to progress this storyline.
Hmmmmmmmm............

Thank you all, I read all the replies here.

For the one I am supposed to meet on last Sunday, her TanTan has been inactive for a few days in a row up to Sunday, I wasn't able to arrange the date properly with her being MIA, our chat was halfway. Her bio says "seldom online in here" and she means it literally by going MIA so long.

She continued to go missing until last night she online again, I asked for her alternative communication method and got her WhatsApp, then had a great time texting each other all night long until she sleeps at 1am.

For some reason she agreed easily in TanTan back then, but seems a bit hesitant when I try to arrange the date in WhatsApp, I can see she did not directly answer the invitation and changed topic. She said she felt a bit embarrassed to finish work quite late and hesitant to make me wait just to dinner with her. But I have a good feeling about this, probably she is just warming up and may change her mind to Yes after some more time bonding with her.

I expect to see her this coming Sun, will go for invitation again maybe after 1 or 2 days. She's really cute and fun to chat with.

Is working in facial service very demanding? Like, almost no time off? Response rate low for these kind of girls, can go missing very long.

Now that you knocked some sense into me, seems that way.

I usually will open the conversation with "Oh you're a facial specialist aren't you?", "I'm going to let you do facial for me".

They will reply, but give it some time they seemed to stop replying if I try to progress to casual chat for bonding purpose.

I took a day's COVID vaccination leave yesterday for the booster, and arranged the date with 1 of my TanTan matches right after the booster shot.

She is elder than me by a few years, but age is just a number, to keep it simple, let's just say she's very desirable, to me. We had a great time together, we went to arcades to play, we especially enjoyed the basketball game, I couldn't beat her score, luckily she thought I was just letting her win, and be happy about it.

Then we both share the same desire for Family Mart's green tea ice cream, she told me she couldn't finish 1 cone, and prefer we buy 1 cone and just share it. I was a bit reluctant but at the end give in. Then we found a place to sit down and just enjoy our time there, talking about stuffs, past future present those things.

At some point the topic started to become heavy for my taste, she told me she was supposed to be married by now if she didn't ask for a breakup in the heat of argument with her bf. I started to sense the urgency of marriage in her tone, she's very looking forward to the ceremony, have kids, be a house wife to focus on the kids, she even came up with names for male and female kids. I just keep listening and listening, seeing her so immersed in this topic.

Towards the end of date, I was going to send her home, before I get out of car park, she took the initiative to kiss me, and then wants to French. I thought it was a harmless move, but then she grabbed my hand and placed it on her chest, now I knew what she wanted. My gut feeling told me do not do it, so I just gently pushed her away and said I did not bring protection, but she said it is fine and do not mind.

My gut feeling at this point further confirmed she might be dangerous, there may be some motive behind, or maybe I was overthinking, it doesn't matter, if my gut says no, it means no. So I stand firm and told her I am just going to send her home. The whole ride was a bit of awkward silence until reaches her home.

I uninstalled TanTan after I reached my home.

Hello bro, it depends.

If their bio is Chinese, then I will use Chinese.
If not, I use English.

Yeah because the demand is on their side, probably a lot of males hitting on them, they do not bother to be interesting and want males do all the work, whoever performs the best she will entertain.

Looks like I had a slightly better experience compared to you, at least I matched with some that are not boring, and had dates, but still at the end it all goes nowhere.

Uninstalled too.