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 I was being asked, If I am fine

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djlake
post Mar 13 2020, 01:47 AM

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QUOTE(shuhuan @ Mar 13 2020, 01:12 AM)
I was being asked, if I am fine for not going to any outing.
I did not reply. But I realized that I have no ambition to go anywhere, to buy anything, to do anything. I don't even know what to live for. I had seek proper help, but it's barely helping. Knowing that my life will never improve, gave me strength to make me want to do it.
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don't do it. look for that one thing, one thing that you don't want to let loose, that one thing that you don't want to give it a miss. there is always that one thing. look for it and hold on to it.

back in 2009, I was diagnosed with anhedonia. i was on cocktail of pills (ssri, alprazolam, zolpidem, lorazepam, etc). I am still here, I have my dips, rarely major episodes, but I hold on to that one thing that I don't want to ever let go. that i treasure the most.

that one thing to me is; music.

to explain it further (why music), you might wanna read this write-up: https://www.heavyblogisheavy.com/2017/01/12...al-black-metal/

we will overcome, we are entitled to overcome.

hang on buddy.

 

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