I was being asked, if I am fine for not going to any outing.
I did not reply. But I realized that I have no ambition to go anywhere, to buy anything, to do anything. I don't even know what to live for. I had seek proper help, but it's barely helping. Knowing that my life will never improve, gave me strength to make me want to do it.

I don't need a horrible mentally sick mil and a husband who does not care about wife. For him, wife and child is not part of his family. Only the people he grew up with is his only family. So it's not about what I need, it's what I do not need.