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 Life problem, Seeking for advice

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TSjerry1227
post Jan 15 2018, 11:36 PM, updated 8y ago

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25 years old guy who withdraw 2 times from higher education because of stupid reason AKA girls.

Stayed house for 2 years time.

I promise to be independent but I cant.

I scare, lack of confident, worry of my future.

I m hoping to going back to college if it could to get me back on track. Unfortunately, my financial situation dosent allow me.

I m totally break down and dosent know what to do.

[Will write detail story if request but overall this is the situation]
TSjerry1227
post Jan 15 2018, 11:53 PM

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QUOTE(jichuen @ Jan 15 2018, 11:47 PM)
how old are you?
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As stated 25. Born in 1994, dec 27.
TSjerry1227
post Jan 16 2018, 11:30 AM

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QUOTE(internaldisputes @ Jan 16 2018, 09:15 AM)
hey sorry to hear about your situation. what do your parents think of all of this? have they been supportive?

good for you for reaching out to people, btw. i think you definitely to find something to keep yourself busy or you will fall deeper into depression. since studying is not possible (plus the risk of you dropping again for the third time) i suggest you can find a spm-level job to do. there's no shame in it as long as you are committed.
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I dont know, they just keep pushing me to independent. I felt every single word of my is excuses, but I m not lying about my fear. I m just not ready to enter the real world. Is shame to being a person like this.

I need guidance and care, not like a baby but instruction of make thing right. Or else I m just lost.
TSjerry1227
post Jan 19 2018, 11:55 AM

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QUOTE(MiracleLatte @ Jan 19 2018, 10:49 AM)
I think you have to take it step by step, may I ask a few questions?

- What are your hobbies?
- What do you like to do? Things that you enjoy doing
- Do you have any particular skills that make you different than other people (small small things also matter, don't by shy to share)
- Do you have any past experiences in working?
- and lastly, before we move on, may we have a better understanding on what do you mean by 'stupid reasons'. What exactly happened that made you drop off from higher education?
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-When I was on higher education 2 years back, I like to observe people when I m free or travelling. I dont know if this is hobby or not. But I do have interest in physiology or public service.

-Learning things that make my life and person who nearby me to be happy.

-Normal person but I m good at digging out things from the web.

-Yes, I worked in cafe, stationary store and tuition center.

-Relationship.
TSjerry1227
post Apr 26 2018, 04:43 PM

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Problem solved but yet another problem I m facing with my rights as a labour.
TSjerry1227
post Apr 26 2018, 11:39 PM

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QUOTE(sweet_pez @ Apr 26 2018, 05:48 PM)
Would you care to elaborate? There are some people with HR background around so they may be able to advice you.
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1. Am I eligible for Overtime if I working from 10am to 10pm? 12 hours a day.

2. There is no black and white receive from the company so far. Even I work for 1 month plus. Is this harm my right as employee if anything happen later on.

These two will be my main concern so far. I wish to leave the company end of the month but I m really afraid that employer will hold my salary or request me to pay because not notice them about the resign. I googled everything but I m not sure about this. If really can I want to sue them.
TSjerry1227
post Apr 27 2018, 08:46 AM

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QUOTE(slimey @ Apr 26 2018, 11:51 PM)
labour law states that more than 8 hours = overtime.
1 week allow 1 day off or 4 days per month aka replacing the 1 week 1 day off with another day of the month
if no take off day, eligible for extra pay
public holiday working = double pay
minimum salary : varies depends on which state you are at. google on your own.

but all those above is assuming that is a permanent employee aka not probational status. probational status may be different according to the contract. correct me if i am wrong on this.

good luck.

it is good that you have decided on something and has move on. the most difficult part on any mental issue is the decision making. all the best for you.
may your experience guide you well and perhaps be a mentor or a listener for anyone else that may have similar problem.
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Dosent they only separate Semenanjung Malaysia and Sabah Sarawak? I dosent receive any black and white stated that probation status will being paid less. FYI, my colleague who worked for 1 year plus having the same pay as me and using the same formula as me to calculate the salary. Working the same hours as me and not being paid OT as well.
TSjerry1227
post Apr 27 2018, 11:31 AM

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QUOTE(sweet_pez @ Apr 27 2018, 09:41 AM)
1. Eligibility of OT is dependent on your salary and also your job/ role:
2. Yes, you need to have a black & white employment contract. Without a formal contract, the employer may even refuse to pay you and say that you have never worked there. Then the burden to prove that he/she is lying, is on you. Or he/ she can pay you RM500 for your work and then ask you to leave at the end of the month, where you cannot protect yourself without any proper employment document/ contract.

P/S: Omg for a minute there I thought I was replying to a thread in J&C haha.
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Isnt below 2k is eligible for OT?

Ok, thxs for your help. I think I will just resign and move on.

where can I find more about employment act?

This post has been edited by jerry1227: Apr 27 2018, 11:32 AM
TSjerry1227
post Jul 9 2018, 07:28 PM

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QUOTE(lauyee @ Jun 28 2018, 05:57 PM)
Sorry to be blunt, but at age of 25 and still couldn't resign properly is quite an indication that you probably haven't held a job in the same industry for long right? Switching around jobs to discover your passion much?
What you are facing is something rather personal, and you probably heard the solution a thousand times, in different forms or words. Some call it lack of discipline, dedication or grit, some will simply call it lazy.

Seeking help is a positive step, if you think a lot, you've probably recognised your own weakness and felt helpless to it.

Let's examine your original post:

25 years old guy who withdraw 2 times from higher education because of stupid reason AKA girls.
Withdrawing twice from higher education due to a girl is nothing to be ashamed of, but it should be something that you need to avoid. Next time don't sign up for a course just because the girl you like to sign up, or if you do and she happens to drop out, find the courage and tenacity to finish off the course anyway. I ended up with a useless accounting diploma, but the knowledge is handy when I'm negotiating sales deal now. Don't underestimate the power of knowledge, and overestimate your intelligence.


Stayed house for 2 years time.
Seems like you manage to leave the house and get a job that you're considering to resign, that's a small positive step, find a better job, and on every next job you find, be less picky about the pay and more picky about what you WANT to do, not what you CAN do. Let me explain, for example, you want to be a movie director, you've never held a camera before, find something in the industry that you can do that will lead you to what you want to do.

I promise to be independent but I cant.
Malaysia has been independent for 62 years and still rely on taxpayers money. Being independent start from taking responsibility, it's never too old to learn, but it's something that should be high on your priority list. Try to take small responsibility, say taking out the trash or sweep the floor daily. It doesn't cost you and gets you started on a schedule and a responsibility that you can swallow.

I scare, lack of confident, worry of my future.
You should be, and you will always be. That's how you grow, that's how you'll breakthrough, and that's how you find future.


I m hoping to going back to college if it could to get me back on track. Unfortunately, my financial situation dosent allow me.
My suggestion, don't bother. Paper qualification is overrated, and most would want to go back to college, it's the period of time when you're old enough to get intoxicated and young enough to escape responsibility. Unless you finally found the grit to grind through the college years, the coursework and then go into a starter job in the industry that absolutely need the paper qualification, else take the alternative pathway. Sign up for short courses, go to udemy, coursera or khan academy to pick up some courses that you are really interested in. Start looking for entry-level jobs in those industries that interest you.


I m totally break down and dosent know what to do.
You're fine, you just need that small push that tells you to man up, grow a pair and go mix with more positive friends. While you're in your situation, you will be prone to participate in money games, MLM and various direct sales opportunities like Insurance, unit trust and saving plans. My honest advice, don't, unless you're sure you WANT to do sales and you can handle rejection. Yea yea, there will be motivational talk, 'sharing' sessions, training that will help you in your trade, but most importantly it's all about consistency, dedication and discipline, the exact quality that you seek to build now.

I wish you all the best.
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Thank you for all the suggestion and criticism. Is really helpful. God Bless you and your family.

 

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