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 Is sex really important?, What is your opinion??

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ionStorm
post Dec 29 2006, 07:11 PM

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QUOTE(quireyuyue @ Dec 7 2006, 09:21 AM)
Recently, a fren of mind encounter a problem. She and her bf decided to get married by next yr, so they have been having sex a few times d but my fren does not really enjoy it. She feel uncomfortable and she said its painful for her bcoz of it.

So, she's been giving excuses and tried to avoid from having sex coz even after she told him the problem, he still insist. Now her bf did not push my fren anymore, but he also did not tok to her. Did not touch her anymore, not even hold her hand!!! he basically just ignore my fren. Not just ignore, he totally pretend as if she's not there!!!! FYI, they're living together and both parents also know about their relationship and the suppose to be coming soon marriage(i dont really know if marriage will take place anymore anot) so their relationship is very very much a serious 1.

haiz....i did not know how i can comfort my fren but i personally disgusted at that guy. I wanna ask my fren to dump him straight out but then i just dun wan push my own opinion on her. Pls give ur opinion on this so i can tell my fren about it.
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Didn't really read the rest of the replies, except that last one, which IMHO was completely chauvinistic.

Sex should not be a necessary ingredient of any relationship, at least, while they are still in the courting/dating phase. Call me "kolot", but I believe in sex after marriage, because I believe its sacred.

Sex however, is a necessary ingredient in a marriage, BUT should not be the deciding factor on whether a marriage goes on or not.

My opinion on your friend's BF -- this is totally ridiculous. He's ignoring her because she doesn't want to have sex with him? It only goes to show you that the most important thing to him, is sex. You then have to question the motive of why he ever dated her in the first place. This kind of guy should be neutered and dumped.
ionStorm
post Oct 11 2008, 04:58 PM

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Sex is important in a marriage, however
1) It should never be done without consideration for the other party, and
2) It should not be withheld for no good reason.

If for some reason, sex is withheld, then both need to work out the underlying reason. Perhaps it is that time of the month, or she is upset with something you did, or he had a bad time in the office. It is in the interest of the marriage that issues like that be resolved first. The sex will then come quite naturally. smile.gif

Edit: I just read the TS's post.
In the case of the TS's friend, it may be wise to actually learn how to have sex. There's alot of stuff on the net which will help them better their sex life. The guy should not push the matter, neither should the girl run away from it. There is absolutely nothing to be ashamed about.

Bottomline - Communication is key.

QUOTE(soggie @ Oct 11 2008, 04:49 PM)
You must be crazy to ever get bored of sex.   doh.gif
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It is very possible to get bored of sex. It happens more often than you think. That said, sex is not the problem. The real problem is -- the relationship. Loving couples can't get bored of sex simply because there's alot of affection going on. If however the relationship is hurt, it is hard to even think of wanting to have sex with your spouse.

The lack of sex in most old couples however, is usually due to a lack of spice/romance in their relationship.

This post has been edited by ionStorm: Oct 11 2008, 05:10 PM
ionStorm
post Oct 12 2008, 12:34 AM

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QUOTE(zeist @ Oct 11 2008, 07:53 PM)
Agree with you. Too much of sex with the same partner will get bored someday. Unless you are talking about sex with different people.  whistling.gif  laugh.gif
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Apparently you didn't read what was more important.

QUOTE
It is very possible to get bored of sex. It happens more often than you think. That said, sex is not the problem. The real problem is -- the relationship. Loving couples can't get bored of sex simply because there's alot of affection going on. If however the relationship is hurt, it is hard to even think of wanting to have sex with your spouse.


Any lack of skill in bed can be learnt.
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