I just realized that LYN create this sub-topic to discuss on marriage. But generally, not much discussion on malay wedding.

So i think this should be a good start for the thread.

Let start with me, im going to get married next year, a kelantanese. So the culture is different on the mas kahwin, wang hantaran n hadiah hantaran.

For other state like selangor, we will separate this wang hantaran and mas kahwin. Means that when the time in akad, we will announce the mas kahwin only, which usually costs lesser. But in kelantan, you need to combine together. Which usually, mas kahwin n wang hantaran will reach around rm 10k, then we need to announce the rm10k when the time in akad.

The other is on hadiah hantaran. Usually in other state, the bride side will give an extra dulang than the groom side. But in my case, the is an kelantanese adat which is called as "Sali" which the bride will give the same dulang number as the groom.

I have more to say. But i will take this as a start. So what yours?

Wow very different.
I thought it was an option to announce the wang hantaran. I mean some people just want to be humble about how much they are giving their daughter away for.

Is there a different culture if a kelantanese marries a non kelantanese?

I not sure if it applied to marrying non kelantanese. And i not really sure about the requirement to announce the mas kahwin. Will check this back again

But i was told as well that when we take the vow (qabul) we can just say "aku terima nikahnya dengan mas kahwinnya yang sekian" or even simpler (happened to my friend) "aku terima" and that just enough

if u included the amount in akad,then only the bride can use the money.not even u.unless under her consent.

Last year when i go kursus kahwin under JAIS, they said mas kahwin must include with hantaran. Means let say mas kahwin rate for Selangor is RM300 + hantaran RM10K, so total would be RM10300. Is it true for Selangorian? Is it compulsory or can be discuss with the bride's family?

and guys, whats your opinion on bersanding and tepung tawar? is it a must in order to maintain adat melayu?

in my opinion bersanding and tepung tawar no need to do bcz its from hindu..it is must what our relegion want not our adat want