was having a pretty bad episode about an hour ago, and i called befrienders for the first time but no asnwer, which is why I came here.

ooo. yes. haha. sudoku is good. being doing that for years, but it is only like a temporary relief, thats the problem. I think its time for me end the whole suicidal thoughts for good, just trying to figure how, and what should i do.

thanks for the positive feedback. as this very moment, Im honestly feeling fine like no suicidal thoughts, im just worried when it comes again, but for the time being, LYN is calming me down.

that's the thing. Ive been trying to figure out why im having these thoughts. Ive tried listing down all the good things in my life, and I am grateful for all the positive things, but I still feel like this.
one thing I realized is that the negative thoughts come when something bad happens to me. for example, I reach the office late.