nowadays also, I kinda know her taste of music. She likes BEP, jason derulo, thriftshop kinda song, Missy Elliot etc. So every week I'll have a new playlist for us to listen and sing along to in MY car

She told me that she liked my playlist. So I was glad. Coz seems like everything that I'm doing I'm doing it for her and she appreciates it. But one thing that I enjoy the most, is the happy crazy things that she does in my car. I can see that she damn likes to sing, and dance as well hahahaha.

I hope she'll still come back with me every night. Its been 3-4 weeks where I have been sending her back home at night. But my other senior who lives a lot nearer to her place is back from study leave. So, probably that will change soon. Regardless, that thursday night seemed like everything was going my way. Coz the senior told her that hes going somewhere else first. So thats when i told her straight away that I'll send her back.

Sometimes, i think the things that I do make it soo obvious. But to date, nobody has ever realised it. Except if i tell them, of which I will never

I wonder if she notices. But even if she did, nothing has changed.

thanks bro.

Okay on the boss part, i knew people would be thinking like this is like, boss of company etc. Its just our team leader, whom I usually call boss. And yeah, this 'boss' im talking about isnt the boss of the company i work for. Just a team lead thats all.

Haha, lawak kan cter aku.. awal2 memang la sume happy je post, baru2 ni je bikin aku panas skit. Semalam la kuar ngn dier tngk movie, ngn lagi sorg kawan dier.. pastu over dinner cakap pasal aku x siapkan kerja, and pasal tu lagi satu senior tu kena datang ofis during leave SEMATA2 nak abes kan keje aku. She din understand the situation, becoz senior aku tu mmg kata dier akan take over. Entah which part dier x paham, still blame aku. Lama2 aku naik emo la, kalau dier kisah sangat pasal org lain, then screw me la isit? Aku pun slalu je datang keje even when on leave, dont see her saying anything about that :/ and i wont deny, yeah memang aku jealous.

Complain and scold? dier bantai je depan orang. well, maybe i exaggerate la. xde la tengking, tapi mcm nagging mak nenek. Penat nak layan. Tau nak bisinggg aje. Everything aku buat ada je nak complain. Kadang2 memang dier messing around, tapi mess2 around pun chill la beb. I have feelings too.

LOL of course la u hear one side aje. How to hear the other side? Hopefully will never hear huh..

anyway, thanks brah. Needed that.

Looks like in my case the 4th quartile represents everything



LOL. OR PROBABLY JUST THE FIRST, PLUS THE SCOLDING.

yea man. I know..

I know its funny, but wat id like to happen would be,

to not think about things like that yet. Just enjoy the moment first.

After a few years, then onli we think. hahahahh..

anyway, just a small update that, both of us are perfectly normal now. Joking as usual, chatting, talking, etc.

I feel like I'm back in the safe zone.. So, now that shes leaving the team even sooner.. I guess my timing would be just right if I could say it to her.

I'm just gonna tell her how i feel, but I dont need her to reply. Coz, I DO NOT want to be in her rejected list.

Just want her to know. thats all. Dont have to reject me. Just stay quiet.

I mean, if u dont respond anything after that, then confirm i no chance la. Otherwise, if got some reaction, then okay la.

waaa not bad ah tycoon..

betul2 tycoon 

I'd consider that. But dunno how to say it to her face.. hahahahh.. jokes.

okay so i left my phone to charge in my sis's room coz my rooms ports are all used up. Its 6.30pm.. and wat usually happens that time is.. id be texting her.. Felt like going to check my phone.. and guess what.. she was texting me. hahahahh..

just a small rant about one of her friends. But okay can talk until quite long. What made it nice was that she was saying that she had rant enough to people..

She rant to her mom, to one of her gf.. and she rant to me. me. me!

hahahahh...

inb4 TS kuat perasan
inb4 TS full of himself
inb4 its nothing special

phone call ah? shes not the type of person to always want to call. She prefers texting. Anyway, there was that one time when I had that heart to heart

call with her when she merajuk. but that was it. Other things if call usually ask shot questions onli. EH WAIT..i tink that also happened a long time ago

when she slightly merajuk with me last time.. so that makes it twice when i called her for a heart to heart.. ohh~

So anyway.. on a bit of an unrelated note, I'm travelling to Japan twice this December. I'm taking 1 month plus leave starting final week november until Jan.

first trip from 2nd week december for a week, go tokyo n mt fuji as a part time tour guide, a job my friend offered me. Then I'll come back for a week

go CF then only go Osaka pulak. Prob is..

Her bday falls during my first trip. I was thinking about it.. if i shud stay standby for her bday ya know.. but when i think about it again..

this job my friend is offering, doesnt require a single cent from me.. free. so.. yea.. i dun wan to be stupid.. so i took the job.

I tink when i come back, which is past a few days after her bday, I'll pass her the bday present, and just say I got it from Japan. HAHAHAHAHA.

encourage him to do what?

I told him to take it easy for now onli. If need to sulk then do so la. Wat for wan to tahan2. Later time will heal.

Aku pulak emo? Thats like shooting me in the face and telling me not to bleed. And I really dont know why u giving him some advice while using me as example.

What unnecessary thing? Do u even know wat the shit u talking about? Or simply wan to sound cool?

Why dont u go to other tereds la.. Give relationship advice here n there not like u some damn love professor also.

i tried to be honest with her. I told her the things that hurt me previously where whenever i ask her she would just

ask me back if i've checked it myself first or not. I told her that, I know that i can check but sumtimes I casually ask her.

Then she went like, I'm questioning her authority pulak. I know she my senior but that aside I know that we're close enough

for me to be honest with her. But she just took it wayyyyyyyyy further than how I hoped she would. She was very pissed that

I could say things like that to her, and whenever I tell her that I'm not like that when she ask me stuff, and how I try to be nice

and as helpful as I can without questioning etc, she took it like, I was indirectly saying she wasnt helpful at all when I ask her about work.

I didnt want my message to be like that, I just wanted her to know that I get hurt whenever she does that. Not to say shes useless or

that she cannot advise me. Gosh, I really didnt want it to be about work at all. I wanted it to be a human-to-human thing u know.

I told her that it wasnt the first time shes simply telling me off like that and that she would rather give me pep talk rather than

just giving me an answer. But she just blew at me like a storm! I was so afraid. I tried so hard to control the situation,

I apologized bringing it up, I made it clear I was only trying to be honest with her, and I wanted to much for her to not take it that way.

Because at one point, she said, " I dont see you questioning <another senior> about it!".

There, that shows that shes getting very very touchy about it. I didnt want it to be work related at all but too bad shes taking it that way.

Sigh. I dont know how to fix this. I apologized so many times but she kept saying like, "you dont need to apologize. Its for me to improve.

Next time it will be strictly professional."  or things like "Oh ok. I will take note of that. Ok. Next time I should talk with u like this like that"

Shes being sooo sarcastic about everything. sum more say "u can reflect this in your upward feedback" .

Later, I apologized again. She said, "you dont need to apologize. these are points for me to improve. And yes I'm not being sarcastic"

What crushed me was this,

"I really appreciate your honesty!"

God. That point, I really feel like nothing I say can fix it. I told her that I know shes pissed.

but she just kept on denying it. and she thanked me for the points I raised up to her.

But guys. shes making it sound so office-ish and work-related. Even her choice of words, sound so formal,

shows that shes really taking it seriously.

Die la I.

I'll give her a call later. I tink I went thru this once but not at this scale.

Wish me luck. I gotta fix this before we meet tomorrow. We have an event that both of us are going to and on Sunday is karaoke.

But just tell me one thing. Was I wrong to be honest? Was i being too much of a pusssyy?

Yes. Deep down I somehow think this is an opportunity. But its risky to think so.

No worries about that. I tink my initial plan to give her that fluffy unicorn still can work for that.

Just that I need to call her tonight to sort it out.