All right everyone,this is my story. I need your opinion and advice what to do since i find my life right now is not peaceful and hard to do everything even sleep. Hope you guys give a positive comment.

I've been with this girl for almost 5 years. We start being couple after 6 months i breaking up with my first love. I love her from the moment i met her but i take things really slowly and doesn't want to commit so much because i'm afraid that i will be dissapointed and heartbroken if things don't work out. It just a cautious step and experience from my first love,since i've been really committed with my first love but in the end we broke up.

I'm her first love so the first 3 years,she was great. Really great until if we had a fight,she's usually the first one who will say sorry. She also usually call me first,text me and asking me to hang out with her as much as possible. She's also like to give shirts,I had like 12 shirts that was given by her. She's always there for me and she chose me over her girlfriends. While on the other hand,i find her "merimaskan". I love her,that's why we holding on but I can't commit too much. I treat her "gitu-gitu" only but sometimes i bought something, call her and other stuff but only SOMETIMES. She treat me like 100 times better than I treat her.

As time went by,I've changed. And she was too. I've became like her and she became like me. She doesn't do the usual thing she does. She like to be mad at me,she like to hangout with her friends,including boys. She doesn't like to call me anymore,blaming me I'm the one who taught her that way. In fact,she's blaming me for everything that made her now. We usually argue and fighting,even for something small and stupid but i'm the one try to hang on to this relation and she like to use "how bout we break up". Seems she can move on but I can't . I love her so much and I regret because not committed 100% from the very first moment we were together. Is it wrong to be cautious??????

We had a big fight last 2 weeks,and after a long talk,she said it was better for us to be separated. But i said i don't want. She said she was heartless,confused and don't know what to do. She realized she had changed a lot and the best way she wanted was to become a friend for a while. She said she doesn't want to hurt me since she's like to start a fight and she's not the girl i met 5 years ago. But she's willing to think and decided until july whether or not to hang on to this relation. It's really hurt for me to wait for her answer. But i still want her and hope for a positive answer. Now she's in Mecca for 2 weeks and i really miss her. The last time we sms,she said she still had a feeling for me but still didn't want to give the yes or no answer whether to stay with me. But she's afraid that if we really break up,she might come back to me after 6 months or so. At this moment,i dont is she is my friend or my ex or my gf.

What should I do now?? It's really hurt to wait... It's really hurt to see her happy while i'm not..
Should i try to "ngorat" her once again and make her fall in love with me like we used to be??

If you don't have the heart for traumas and dramas, then walking away is your best option.

Staying on and hoping things will work out fine will never be fine

It's already been traumas and dramas now..

try to win her back... court her...

if it doesnt work....seeing her happy with her life would be your best gift for her

Give her up . that b**** is giving excuses.

Heartless, confused, need time.

it all bs tbh.

been there, dont that. move along now.

u will be happier.

trust me.

Sometimes, people do need time.

Saying all is Bs is abit harsh.

But yea, I get where you're coming from.

TS, think positively and do something, since she said its until july, you have to perform and do something creative to prove that you love her at once!

That's one of my idea but afraid it will not work out and the risk,i could get her or i could become more worst.

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Added on April 25, 2012, 9:05 amHow can I perform if I was hurt. It's so hard,like injured people that can't run. It's even harder when she's act normal and heartless. But thank you. I try waiting + try to win her back. I don't know if i can wait that long enough.

This post has been edited by cfoo123: Apr 25 2012, 09:09 AM

give each other space to calm down. She need to think about the future of the relationship, so do you.

If u really love her and want her to be your life partner, then u should put more effort. I used to have fight with my girlfren. Later we both realize it is important to give space and understand each other. One thing i am damn sure is even if u win the argument u will feel bad, because while u win u are hurting her. I learn to give in when both of us is angry, not because i am wrong, but because i love my girl. I will talk things over when we both are cool. That time she can accept correction more willingly.

Good luck!

no pain no gain bro...

too early to give up...just try...at least u have done your best...if she is meant for you then you will get her... if it doesnt, just let her go... u love her right? so no point in forcing her to be with you...

What's the meaning of giving space in your perspective?? I could follow your experience.

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Added on April 25, 2012, 9:16 amAlright man. But i just afraid that i will be like "syok sendiri".

This post has been edited by cfoo123: Apr 25 2012, 09:16 AM

dont be afraid to fight for your loved ones...

we do silly things when we are in love...

You know what will happen? A break up when she comes back. You should start preparing yourself...

stop giving too much excuses man, what do you mean by an injured man can't run?

if you cant stop giving yourself excuses then you will never succeed

U have to wow her once again. Win back her heart. Put in more efforts dude, don't take everything from her like granted. Action speaks louder

she probably trying to refresh her mind again.

you can keep trying but not pushing too much

try to court her once again like the first time.. if it works, congrats. if not, just move on. wish her the best..

Alright,thank guys for all of your advice.. Right now is preparing something special for her when she come back.. But is so painful waiting for her to come back.. Just like already breaking up.. The time is so slow..

probably she tired on u. She alway make the first move for the 3 years. & u seen no changes or any reaction. That y it need to be refresh.

She have another guys for such changes.