Ah a good time to start the Skrtel jokes all over. Similar to the Chuck Norris ones. Here are some to get the ball rolling. Multiple sources :-
1) Skrtel isn't afraid of the dark... the dark is afraid of him
2) Martin Skrtel doesn't daydream. He's too busy giving other people nightmares.
3) In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Martin Skrtel could use to kill you, including the room itself
4) Martin Skrtel can beat Rafa Nadal on clay
5) Martin Skrtel haunts Freddy Krueger's nightmares.
6) God said "let there be light." Martin Skrtel said "say please"
7) Chuck Norris rang Martin Skrtel and asked for his jokes back.
Martin Skrtel said no…
8) Martin Skrtel played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won
9) Martin Skrtel once crashed his car at 100 mph. The airbag didn't dare to come out
10)Martin Skrtel had a meal when in Jakarta. He didn't like, so he spat it out. That piece is now called Australia (

darn Brits)
11) Actually Martin Skrtel died some years ago but the death is too afraid to tell him
12) Martin Skrtel does not turn on the light, he turns off the dark
13) Aliens do exist. They're just waiting for Martin Skrtel to die before they attack
LOLOLOLOL good one. With all the hate that's been going around this is perfect.