Our baby sleep on double tilam on the floor. My mother in law took a pillow and sit on it, next to him to sayang him. As she get up, my mother in law, wanted to toss the pillow to our bed, accidentally dropped a pillow on our baby while he is sleeping and he had a shocked. When that happened, he woke up and cried. Then go back to sleep. At night, he cried non stop. Now, he's still scared, sleeping time, he will kick a bit like having a bad dream.

I spoke with my husband about this, to monitor my mother in law whenever she try to carry / feed the baby. He agreed. There is nothing else can be done since what happened, already happened.

What can we do to make sure the baby not so scared? We already sew a soft pillow to be placed across his chest / tummy. Please help!

How old your baby ?

try sleeping tummy down....

My brother accidently dropped a chair on my baby once (I cringe now that I think about it) and she screamed blue murder. The most important thing I did after that was to hug my baby so tight, kissed her boo boo and kept saying to her that 'Baby strong girl, your uncle didnt do that on purpose, he's sorry. Mommy will be here all night to nurse your boo boo'.

My brother felt terrible and I had to suppress the urge to yell at him - cause it wont do any good since the damage was done. But till today he felt guilty as heck.

My baby? She's OK now

Nothing so serious as compared to Syd G's chair but still, mother see definitely will heart pain. Moreover, this is mother-in-law, shouting definitely no no and besides, its not just her, can happen to anybody as is accident.

gary888,
My baby is less than a month old.

ttan777,
Sure it's a good idea to sleepy tummy down?

Syd G,
How long did it take for your baby girl to recover from this scared feeling?

@merchant9
In 5 minutes. Really. She cried herself to sleep in my arms and couldnt remember anything the day after. This happened during her 2nd month

Regarding your baby, I dont think he's scared by the pillow - he's just having the fourth trimester. Do read this article - http://www.ninemonths.com.au/fourth-trimester/ . It really helped me tremendously in going through the toughest first 3 months.

I dont really think its due to your mom-in-law, as our baby also has this behaviour without anything similar hitting him.

Its not recommended to sleep the nite thru on the tummy, due to risk of asphyxiation (spelling?).

BUT its damned good to prevent baby from getting scared, as most of the limbs become sort of tied down, it mimics the tight constrains of the womb.

So sometimes when our baby gets fussy or wakes too easily, we will flip him over to the tummy. Then when he falls deep asleep we'll turn him over again. Major effort I know.

However if you're confident your baby won't suffocate facing downward its a great method to prevent the scares. What you can do is use a pillow that's a bit bouncy and will not easily fill up the gaps. Using a pacifier also ensures there is gap between the nose and pillow.

Another method to prevent scaring is to swaddle the child in a blanket or cloth diaper. We used this method from 3weeks to 10 weeks while the baby still weak at the arms. If done correctly it almost ensures our baby will be quiet for a few hours. Need to make sure they are not too hot though.

All the best and don't worry too much.

i think what u can do is give yr baby continuous assurance that u are there for him/her.

Once my baby fell on his back while trying to sit, and phobia for 1-2hrs from sitting, but we still encouraged him until he did it again...

First off, thanks for responding.

Yes, the other thing we did was to swaddle him. Didnt know the word until I read the article you shared. Thanks!

Just wondering that pillow dropping incident and how much effect does it have in his growing up stage. No worry is fake one but cannot be angry also. Just want to know what more can be done.

Hi lee82gx,

Thanks for sharing these great ideas. I will give it a try tonight.

Will he, being less than 30 days old be able to tell if I'm there for him? I AM! But at night he sleeping like trembling and other relatives kept saying he's frightened and there's nothing much can be done. Even the anti-afraid pill (Chinese green pill inside a box) cannot be eaten at this stage.

Just post here so see feedback on what more can be done.

Eye contact with a little smile towards the baby every once awhile. Give it a try. Have you tried "real pearl powder" (I'm not sure if my direct translation is correct from Cantonese) but you can get it from a Chinese sensei for about RM10 per packet at the Chinese herbal shop nearby. Apply a little on your finger and dab it around the lips of your child. Give some water to your child to drink after that.

Regards, Joey

This post has been edited by Joey Christensen: Dec 13 2010, 04:19 PM

One important thing if you're trying tummy sleeping...you need to pujuk the baby to sleep first...you can't expect the baby to turn over and suddenly fall asleep!

try making a small pillow for ur baby n put it on top of ur baby to make him feel safe again

the other way is to sew a small pillow (with small weight) and put it on his chest. these will help her to think, someone is there for there. it did well on my sister's baby and my daughter. so far so good....

Have you seen a doctor/pediatrician to ensure that your son is not suffering from any injuries?

less than a month is normal to wake up n cry and all. Should be colicky.....or just wanna be pampered. Dun think its the pillow at all.

BTw this reminds me, are you feeding him some chinese herbs to buang angin? MY MIL feed my baby dunno wat herbs to buang angin and he cant sleep the whole day n nite crying nearly every hour nonstop. We suspect that is the cause of it because be4 that no problem at all. After we stop giving him that, no more fussiness or crying except when hungry. Try to think if you are feeding anything besides milk to your bb? Or if you are breastfeeding, are you eating anything differently that may have cause this? Foremilk and Hindmilk inbalance will cause baby to be colicky if you are breastfeeding so make sure you are feeding correctly too.

And if u wanna do tummy sleeping, better get a latex mattress and pillow to prevent SIDS. Your newborn cannot turn his head away if he is suffocating.

This post has been edited by mIssfROGY: Dec 14 2010, 05:05 PM

Yes, we did that. I'm not sure if he can take the pearl powder, as mentioned he has not even have his full moon yet.


Ok, we will try and see if it works.

We already did that. Thanks!

Yes, we already did that!

No, we have not. A pillow, we thought not that serious, except that he's kicking (disturbed sleep). Maybe we should. I will discuss with my husband and see how.

OH btw.....baby kicking, not sure about yours....mine is a signal he wants to either Poo or Pee even in his sleep, then true enuf when we check his diapers, oredi soiled. Sometimes its also due to dreams he is having (read this somewer, forgot the link)

I am not too sure with your description of the sequence of events. You can judge better if the incident had caused any injuries before taking your son to a doctor. It could be colic as MissFrogy said. Colic is the most common problem for this age. It may have nothing to do with the pillow. It is just a coincidence.

below 1 year old better not take the risk, prone position can be fatal, dun play play yo.

My MIL actually tried to feed my daughter 'Chan Chi Fan' when baby was about 2 days old. I sort of told her off. Not that I dont believe in traditional medicine. But not really something that I want to do. Why? I dont know how clean the stuff is. What about contamination and etc. Breast Milk is the best. If baby is scared, try lying down and place baby on your chest. Comfort and talk to the baby softly. Your heartbeat and warmth will calm the baby down. When carrying the baby up from the tilam, make sure you hug the baby close to you then only rise. Do not lift the baby up just like that. Usually, they get 'shocked'.