Honestly, let's not blame it totally on the baby. We are in modern days, and yes, our wife do work. I do not blame her for working if that's what she prefer. I just honestly don't understand why she choose to do beyond her capabilities. In fact, there are a lot of women just like her.

As a matter of fact, how I wished for her to be like her elder sister, even just by 50%. Being a first timer, she has zero experience with babies, while I helped my mom look after my siblings and even help during her period as babysitter. It led to a nightmarish hell for our relationship. I wished that I had find a babysitter instead of handling over to my mom. It was hell at work because I had to do the hard work after foreign workers are being freeze, then came back to hear all kind of comments and nagging when what I need was rest and some love, and even have to look after the baby. The first thing she always did when she came back from work is take her son to our room. I told her if you are tired, leave it to mom or my siblings. Get some nap cos we will be looking after him at night. This is because my son is not a sleeper at night. Cries every 30minutes or so. Instead all I get is nagging. An electrical swaddle helped a bit later on but our past romance never return lor. For the past 18months, what I can remember are those arguments, nagging, etc. Romance, yes, sometimes reconcile after a heated argument, but days later, back to usual problem. There are a lot more but lazy to discuss.

I really wish to express this to all the ladies who wanna get pregnant and bear their own child. Learn to share your baby with your in-laws and relatives. No point keeping them to yourself, especially when you don't have the capacity and capability to look after them yourself. It's not like we, men don't care about our own child, but there is a compromise in everything. All you need is to spent quality time with them. It does not matter how long, it's about how memorable. You can have all day with them and yet they don't stick to you. But your husband, abandon him and he'll be gone for good. I don't think there is a lot of men out there who can suffer lack of sex and romance for few years. Find a balance in everything.

Well, I did not expect my mom to do it. It was partly because my dad wants her to do it. Anyway, I don't want to comment on your opinion. I don't think I need to look after them personally to be called responsible. You do what you do best. That's it. If you wanna force yourself to excel in it, don't blame your husband. Everyone has their own commitment and therefore a compromise is needed.

What I can say is easier said than done. Not like we haven't discussed about it. I give my mum 700bucks to look after my son, I don't mind paying more to sent him over to the babysitter. We talked about it, she even said wanna sent over to her aunt who is a babysitter but in the end, still reluctant.

That's why I said, learn to share, not dump your baby to someone else. I can't be 24/7 on my son. She also pamper him a lot. Getting bitten by my son, always disturb her while she is doing something. Im quite strict on him. I cane him since 15months old. I also don't like locking him in my room like my wife. I prefer letting him roam the whole house while keeping him away from stairs n bathroom. I don't care people calling me mean, not being understanding, big man ego, etc. Each person got their limit. I told her to cane my son when he start making fuss but she don't listen. Now she gets pick on very often and sometimes just goto sleep just like that, leaving the two of us.

Each family got it's own tale. I knew some of my male clients who have affairs outside. Sometimes don't be fooled by the calm appearance. To their wifes', my husband is very understanding but little did they knew that they have offloaded their husband sexual appetite to someone else.