Sigh.

Some of you know my story and about how I'm going to get married sometime mid next year. I had planned to keep things simple but it seems that suddenly things are going out of control...

As usual, all the problems of getting married have to do with MONEY. It seems interesting that there are already topics like this opened before I even posted this up. Here's the issue.

My fiancee is feeling very sad because she feels that as the bride, she should not have to pay for anything and that asking her to chip in on her own wedding is sad and degrading. Me on the other hand, cannot afford to pay for the entire ceremony for the following reasons.

1. Her mum requests a dowry of 3k+ which is cheap by most standards so I'm not complaining there.
2. Also requests 3 different Ang Pow. Its for tradition but the amount she didn't state yet.
3. Fiancee request Photo shoot worth about 2k++ (Damn expensive for photos you wont look at 6 months after your wedding)
4. The big whooper (Wedding dinner costing about 5k)
Haven't cover the the alcohol, gown rental and much much more...

All this I have to cover because my fiancee feels it is my responsibility...
So within the span of a year, I need to put away slightly over 10k (12 to be safe) only to watch it disappear...
And my fiancee wanna go honeymoon later as well....
Sigh...

I argued with her about this already and no solution in sight...

Damn sad...

Obviously someone very insensitive to girls dream
Obviously someone without a gf
thank you, after reading your post you made me really really appreciate my husband

i see a lot of idiots actully talks about how cheap it is.

you can't compare cheap or expensive based on you POV. you might be thinking that's cheap because you're in different income bracket compared to TS

its his fiancee mindset that need a major overhaul.

Dont say like that la, you try to look at things on the parents side, they're handing their daughter to you, means she will be the boys family side, the grandson all follow the boys surname. And its only respectful that you at least compensate back something and this for 2000 years ago has been practice the boy pays the in laws money/gold.

A respectful boy is the boy that I admired.

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Added on May 12, 2009, 9:17 am

ask around it is cheap ESPECIALLY IN TOWN....it is still cheap if you compared to Mentakab wedding

One of my daughters is already married and no, she did not demand an extravagant wedding from my son-in-law.  Just a simple reception and a buffet dinner.

Both my daughters were taught to be independent and rely on themselves as they had a good education.  No child of mine believes in leeching off others.

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Added on May 12, 2009, 4:04 pm
Possibly.

Spare us your cheap and inaccurate history lessons about gender conditions.

For quality information regarding gender roles and how education has empowered BOTH men and women, I recommend the following book:

Gender Education & Equality in a Global Context
Conceptual Frameworks and Policy Perspectives
By Shailaja Fennell, Madeleine Arnot
In the 21st century, MORE women are working productively than ever before at any point in history.  BOTH parents take care of their children.
Due primarily to education and a more effective dissemination of quality information.

Read about real social conditions before you debate with me about this subject.

My mom is a housewife so naturally my dad paid for everything, but of course I am not in the right position to comment as my dad used to work as a high position before retiring.     

100% on husband
But dun blame me...he insist I quit my job and stay at home go shopping ,

Anyway we're discussing on general chinese culture here, no?