Sigh.

Some of you know my story and about how I'm going to get married sometime mid next year. I had planned to keep things simple but it seems that suddenly things are going out of control...

As usual, all the problems of getting married have to do with MONEY. It seems interesting that there are already topics like this opened before I even posted this up. Here's the issue.

My fiancee is feeling very sad because she feels that as the bride, she should not have to pay for anything and that asking her to chip in on her own wedding is sad and degrading. Me on the other hand, cannot afford to pay for the entire ceremony for the following reasons.

1. Her mum requests a dowry of 3k+ which is cheap by most standards so I'm not complaining there.
2. Also requests 3 different Ang Pow. Its for tradition but the amount she didn't state yet.
3. Fiancee request Photo shoot worth about 2k++ (Damn expensive for photos you wont look at 6 months after your wedding)
4. The big whooper (Wedding dinner costing about 5k)
Haven't cover the the alcohol, gown rental and much much more...

All this I have to cover because my fiancee feels it is my responsibility...
So within the span of a year, I need to put away slightly over 10k (12 to be safe) only to watch it disappear...
And my fiancee wanna go honeymoon later as well....
Sigh...

I argued with her about this already and no solution in sight...

Damn sad...

That's terrible....

If you have already fallen in love, Money shouldnt matter unless you are in abject poverty.


Persevere dude... Try and reason with her.

If you two are really in love, she will be reasonable.

All the best.

This post has been edited by ezralimm: May 11 2009, 08:05 PM

Since u mentioned ang pow i assume u're chinese? Chinese wedding dinner sure can get back more money from ang pow (which your guests will give you) then the cost of the dinner.

sorry to hear of your problem, but if you guys are chinese then I agree it is your responsibility on the wedding bill, if you want the girls side to pay then marry a eurasian

Dowry 3k considered cheap

Photoshoot 2k considered cheap

wedding dinner 5k also considered cheap, and as mention you can ROI on this the same night, if lucky you may even make money

Conclusion, dont complaint, your future wife considered very very kind to you.

Kindness? I beg to differ. When it comes to spousal matters, you don't know what that word means.

sorry, pls elaborate.

lost in england.

spousal matters?

1. thats damn cheap
2. thats the compensation for (1)
3. thats damn damn cheap so stop complaining
4. usually u'll get all back, plus extra pocket money unless all the relatives are damn poor ppl

If u are planning that your fiancee should/could atleast contribute, then find one that does that.
Or else stfu and live with your choice.

And then three months later everything is forgotten ... because human will never appreciate things done for them.

http://www.answers.com/topic/spousal

nonono... i know what the word means.

But in relation to what moorish said:

she said she thinks TS' spouse is kind..

so you're being sarcastic? Or are you agreeing with her?

Sarcasm.

To have a marriage, yes u do need lotta money.

I guess this will just be the tip of the iceberg

1. 3k can be earn within a year so no problem.
2. No problem by next year also can gao tim.
3. 2k only, by next year also can gao tim. Girls like this, do it for them.
4. Wedding dinner you will get back the dinner money from ang paos. So you don't have to pay that much in the end. There is no written rule that must have alcohol. Even for my wedding I don't think I will have hard liquor, just red wine and yes I'm chinese. Nothing wrong with no alcohol.

If i remember correctly, you are the guy who post your problem last time. But no matter, this is a special day, for you, your wife to be, your family and her family. If money is tight, cut down on non necessities like maybe alcohol, or wedding car can borrow fren's car, etc and spend more on the necessities and fine details. Your wedding can look grand without spending the odd 20-30K. Get friends to help. Involve them in some decorations, help in make up, etc. There are so many area you can save in i think. I never married and dun know much bout marriage process but I'm sure there are many areas to save in. The pour out on more needed area.

Once you work out the fine details, get help, etc. I'm sure things will fall into place. Cheers

Wedding ceremony is such a waste of money. Just register and inform both of your family and friends that you're married by texting them, problem solved.

hope next time when married she wont think that as a wife , to chip in into the house or furniture is sad or degrading .
if she wants a honeymoon so much , she should chip you too . Irresponsible .
You people say all these is cheap , i would personally like to see you ppl earn that money .

TS,....when u wanna marry...u r prepare to spend money!

dun u ever think so? Tis is already started when the moment when u date her or paktor wif her!

Behind every love/romance, money is the 1 who playing the role actually.Only most guys become a "fool" of himself which they dun realize!

hahaha. and if reasoning fail, become a slave for the retarded mindset of his fiancee?

yeah right. love prevail my as$

dude...10-12k is not much for ur wedding lar...photoshoot 2k++ where got enuf...and the dinner 5k? u mean about 10 tables rite? btw have u consider furniture for the wedding room? my best fren just got married recently...and his expenses roughly as below

dowry he giv 8k but the in-law return 3k..so only 5k...the angpow thing i dunnolar..but then got request a few tradition stuff...photoshoot his wife wanna the best coz its the only time...so spend another 5k, the dinner cost about 25k, but u can take back wan mah...guests give u angpow wan mah...then honeymoon...europe n new zealand around 20k for 2...then furniture for room around 8k..(dunwan talk about house 1st lar) so total around 63k... not to showing off the numbers here...but to get a good wife at only 10k-12k..wahlau...wat else u wan 2complain..money can earn back..good wife once lost cannot find back...ok..10-12k..work harder a bitlor to earn back...wedding need to be happy mah...cheer up!

that's an example of a good wife?

damn. i bet she'll be running away if TS have financial difficulties in the future