Unfortunately, I've come to find that life isn't a fairy tale. Whether or not we choose to ignore that economic factors do put strain on a relationship, is up to us. Is it cheap to buy a house, raise a kid, send him to college, etc? The answer is obvious indeed. Can a couple in poverty live happily together forever? I'm not going to spend too much time looking for the answer to that one. Given the choice, I'd rather do what I can to ensure I live happily together with my spouse confortably.

Again, your comments are based on looking at external factors as what they are. When I say looks, you see a strapping young man with a smouldering gaze. I see a well groomed individual who may not be the best looking guy around but puts in care and effort to ensure he looks neat. When I say wealth, you see of a stack of money. I see a man who wants to provide the best for his family, working hard at his job. I choose to focus on the reason a person works towards these external factors, instead of envying them for having them, trying to convince myself that they were lucky, or they must be pricks. I admire the attitude.

Do I believe in love? Of course but I also accept that a relationship can be stronger when you take care of the other more superficial elements of a relationship. I find it hard to believe that given a choice between two people who are exactly alike in terms of their character, we won't even consider the superficial element like looks.

Maybe I am in a relationship for the wrong reasons, I don't ask myself that question. I act on what I think is right, rather than sit around hoping I am. I've made mistakes in the past when it came to relationships and I'm making corrections. I'm not the most successful guy around but I have new found ambition in drive, something I never had during the earlier parts of my career. I've come to realise that for my circumstance to change, I must change.

I'm not disagreeing but if you can do something to give yourself and advantage, why not? I was at what was possibly the lowest point of my life some 3 years ago. I had put on a lot of weight and was in a dead end job. Looking back all I did was beat myself up for it, not doing anything to improve my predicament. My girlfriend had left me a year into that and I was unable to start a new relationship for 2 years. Why? Well it could be that I just didn't appeal to anyone. I mean, I was somewhat overweight and I had a job with no real future. The bigger reason however was that I had no confidence in myself. It wasn't that I had no money because heck, I still don't! One day I got out of bed and decided to change my life around. I started getting active with sports again, watched my diet and changed careers. I lost weight and I have much better prospects at my place of work now. I had new found confidence and started dating again. Now, I won't be surprised if people misconstrue this all to be a boast. On the contrary I'm just sharing what I went through. If it can benefit someone, good. If not, then no harm was done.

My point? Although I earn a decent living, I don't have much money because I had just made a career change. Takes awhile to build up some mulah worth mentioning. Suddenly I had no problems with women, not like before. What changed? It wasn't because I had money all of a sudden. It was because of the effort I put into improving myself and my situation. Therefore, I think the thread title is misleading.
Cool.
I liken it to say preparing for a 100 metre dash. You invest some time to get in shape, and you train daily to get the best possible time. Same with the game of life if you ask me. You do what you have to do to best equip yourself. I'm not suggesting that money should be the basis for a relationship, it would be foolish for me to say so. Even if it were, I'd never want it to be the basis for mine.
Here's my point. If two people who were just as nice hit on a girl, the better looking one with more money stands a better chance. It would appear as though I'm stating the obvious if I were to end there, no? Yup. Just to add, what do you think the layman would say had he witnessed that courtship? That the guy with more money, and was better looking won because he is rich and handsome. Therefore, the girl has to be superficial and money minded. No, it could not be because he is genuinely also a nice guy with plenty else to offer. Ah my point; that the thread title, "girls are money minded" is misleading and innacurate. She may have looked beyond the money and looks, and saw a guy with drive, ambition, who takes care of himself and is therefore capable of taking care of her.

u don't understand love, hence your questions~ girls who go for money have nothing to do with love, they just want money~ money is not love, love isn't much related to money~ it's only in your mind~

do I need to repeat myself? when I'm in love, my tolerance do not increase much, the moment a girl tries to change me, I'm out~ if the girl would like to ask a favour, that's fine~ love isn't only about tolerance~ the moment u tolerate beyond your normal means, u become someone else, defeating the purpose of love; to be with someone who can accept u for who u are~

your baby is a product of your creation~ the poo that comes out of her is originally because u decided to have a baby in the first place~ don't put the whole responsibility on the baby~

I know what I want in life no need to tell me....but I'm asking you?
since you are the one who believe in fairytales...

so what is the answer?

you are wet blanket, teongpeng.

So what about you? so how long do you think the marriage will last with a bum?

if you daughter or sister is about to wed a bum what is your true reaction or advice to her....keep the answer to yourself.

Teongpeng, can you simplify your statements? 

i'm not interested in partnership, not interested in MLM, not interested in insurance. And I don't want to get conned.

Aiya neve give chance already judge. Even if not interested, i guarantee u learn more abt the truth of wealth building in this Yamchar session with me than u would with any yamchar u have been on. All u need to be is a little bit more open minded.

What if I'm very happy, very in love, he is such a romantic guy and treat you like a goddess and he is rich?

This does not make sense.

You could also say, the chances for true love to blossom are equal whether or not one is left-handed or right-handed, so why not take your chances with the right-handed ones?

The chances for true love to blossom are equal whether or not one is short or tall, so why not take your chances with the tall ones?

The chances for true love to blossom are equal whether or not one is Asian or Western, so why not take your chances with the Western ones?

If you choose to narrow your prospects so, you are expressing a bias. You are saying that you cannot look beyond your biases to love a person who does not meet them. You are being superficial.

But when your bias is for money, there's another word for it. It's called greed. You see, to be superficial is to be immature. You can grow out of it, or you can let the world knock some sense into you.

But greed is ingrained. Greed is a lot harder to get rid of. Greedy people are a lot less likely to change.

I think that goes without saying. I mean if you were ask me to pick between two women who were similar in every way except that one was hotter than the other, I'd pick the hotter one of course. What irks me personally is her choice of the word "rich". We aren't looking at two opposite ends of the spectrum, so the term "rich" is relative. One guy is richer than the other, which doesn't mean that the guy who isn't as rich is poor. He just isn't as rich.

This means that if she had a choice of picking between a guy who earns say RM10,000 a month and another who earns RM 15,000, she would go for the latter, all other things being equal. Now once again, if they are exactly the same, why not go for the richer one? However as she herself has mentioned, there is a large grey area. It could mean that the guy who earns RM 10,000 is actually an up and coming success story, a rags to richest story if you like. The guy who earns RM 15,000 may have inherited his father's company and sucks at his work. What am I getting at? The RM 10,000 has the potential to be even more successful in the near future because he works harder. He has already learned the hard way how to climb to the top and even if he falls once, he knows how to get back up there. The latter can't say the same. These are factors I'd consider when talking about grey areas.

I may have missed something as I've not read EVERY post, but saying you'll go out with the richer guy without considering these other factors just shows that a person chooses instant gratification over a delayed one. Often the latter is longer term.

Cant blame him... he dun understd wat u wrote.. but i do.