The thing is I do see logic in your argument. However you tend to use the word, "rich" a lot but then go on to say that you aren't expecting a BMW. Rather, you have found someone that can provide for the family with shelter, food, and an education for your kid. The thing is I don't think a person needs to be rich to provide the items I listed. The thing is your posts seem to indicate that in order to provide the necessities, a person has to be rich, which I don't get.



Cool, I'm a willing learner.

See when I ask you whether most of the prostitutes are doing this to send their brother and sister to school you keep quiet and refuse to answer the question. Instead you sudddenly became emo , resort to calling ppl arrogant and say that I disrespect for the unfortunate. It's as though you're resorting to name calling to cover up your inability to answer a simple question.



When can you get into the very thick skull of yours that I'm not talking about rich or poor. I'm saying that if you place a standard on a guy, the guy can also place a standard on you regardless of whether he's poor or rich.

And when are u getting into your thick skull that she never oppose the standards placed by the guys?

No. I have never said that I don't agree others.

Just that I have seen so many of guys there so afraid to see women stay at home feed and take care of children and houseworks while clinging to their husband for monetary support. They are afraid of this because they can't provide and they are not willing to strive to gain this respect a man deserve.

Even if he is doing MLM, he is trying his best to provide and aim a better living. He work hard and he deserve a better living.

I never ask all men must marry a woman who aim to be a fulltime mother, I just hope all men here don't expect woman to work and responsible for house works at the same time. Biologically woman sacrifices family by delivering babies, why can't men work hard to provide a better living? I don't understand why nowadays seem to take working ladies for grandted. They assume a woman work before married, give birth, taking care of babies and then back to work again to support the family; where men just work before married, work after married and after all they don't understand how hard a woman is when she is married. Why is it so hard for a man to be the one and only monetary supporter? Why can moorish's husband can but you guys can't? Who is more pathetic here?

i'm also coming from the point of view that money = security.
okay, but how would u answer to my statement that alot of mothers happy with their family without being money minded? how often do u see that certain scenario like u said? more than mothers happy with their families?

those girls were simply stupid, and the husbands werent loving enough to strive harder for the family. but choosing money over would also hurt in the long run, simply balance is the best lah. thats it, easy to understand. i've stressed balance many times already, but u wont listen.



i don't, thats why i didn't say anything about them choosing love or handsome of whatever factors over one another. its only u thats basing. i'm simple stating the possibility.



yeap, but u forgot social. and are u saying prehistoric people arent capable of love? sure its dangerous, but even in tough times, love prevails?
if not, then at least humans have evolved to the point where we can feel and know love.

Really? You have never read my posts before flaming me and make assumption on my views. Don't you? Why you teased me? You dared to admit that?

If he falls short, I am more than willing to be with him. It's a commitment of a marriage. He's capable to reach the extend of financial capable, he can make a life with me even if he falls short. A man who can't even provide before or after marriage, don't tell me how much he loves me. This would be empty promise. He doesn't pursue better is not his fault, but he doesn't even think of the entire living expenses of a family and doesn't willing to strive harder, is purely a big failure of a man.

You can't give a facts and real life examples to convince me and tell me that I'm wrong because you don't have such experiences and you are a pampared kid under parents' shelter. Therefore you're living in your own "ideal mindset" and you thought it is alright and it is fair as to support gender equality.

God only knows what kind of person I am. Unlike you, you haven't even tried to read the posts what the person is actually talking about and stepping in this thread with so much of "high-moral" theory. YOu don't know my theory, your statements and comments to me are nulified.
(p.s: I can actually say that "It's simply because I'm a chinese who knows chinese and english and therefore I'm a translator but you are only a chinese who knows ONLY english and that's why you wonder why I can make it", but I will not say this to you cos I know different people from different family background and I will leave a respect to you.)

I'm more than glad to share you your idea but your statements make me puzzled and doubtful as you showed no facts and real life reasons. You can imagine a man marry 3 wives today and have plenty of children but each wife support her and her children's living expenses, you can tell me this also if you don't think facts and real life reasons are important to put in a debate and to make people see people is wrong?

Yes, I admit it was a lame attempt to shut you up because I don't like to and I don't use to tease people to make people feel hard and make them speechless. No matter how are you going to flame me, I will write in words and concrete facts, in a mature way.

You are trying to decipher because you haven't really stood on my shoes to understand my view.

This post has been edited by debbieyss: Oct 9 2009, 07:39 PM

lol, u start with it i end with that. so whats wrong ?

anyway, if today my galfren is too fat i would want her to slim down. is not merely cause of look but i concern bout the health as well. And if u think properly, if i go for looks why on earth i would give chance to a fat girl when i can court a decent looking girl. Thats when if i discover the good side of this fat girl, and i started to develop feeling on her. But, in the same time i demand so that she can improve and looks even better. I hope u can see the difference between me and moorish.

If the feeling is right i dun mind give a chance to her, and for u to know, i use to court a fat girl before and she reject me cause she couldnt believe.

Please la nowadays, women who work share the household chores with the husband. Some hire maid so that they can cope with the housework. And if you think delivering babies is hard for the next 9 months, wait till you have the pressure of having enough finances for your children for the next 30 years. Yes, mental pressure and work pressure for the next 30 years.
Ever wondered why women live longer than guys ?
Also it's a two way thing, women do not understand how hard is it to support the family, provide education to the kids and have enough money. They assume if you work hard = success but the funny thing is they can't be rich themselves. Why can so many career woman juggle between family and work but Moorish cannot? Who is more pathetic here?


As I said if you put a standard on guys, guys can also use the same standard against you.

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Added on October 9, 2009, 5:26 pmAre you speaking on her behalf that she doesn't oppose ?
So can I assume based on your statement tat she doesn't oppose that the husband has the right to demand that she still look pretty at the age of 45. After all he's still rich at the age of 45.


This post has been edited by Drian: Oct 9 2009, 05:33 PM

I think you;ve a thicker skull, plus blind, I've edi mention so many times guys can set whatever standard they like, if they think they're worth, which they've been doing all this while anyway but afraid to admit, otherwise all the fat ugly girls wont find it a problem to get married.

but if you;re refering to my husband changing his mind after we got married then its a problem, coz he convinced me he love me deeply just as I convinced him I dun treat him like an ATM machine.

I've super power to scour the postings on this thread and miraculously discovered the fact that NO SHE DOESNT CARE !

....and doesnt care is almost similar to NOT opposing.

Whats it to you anyway? your comparison by the way doesnt hold water. Looks is different from money. Even if She proudly claim that she expects financial capability in a man and at the same time claim that men who go for looks alone are shallow....

And guess what? SHE WILL STILL BE RIGHT.

Money gets u security. Thats survival. Thats important. What can looks get you? Hmm..genius?

Go girl! tell them the way it is!

This post has been edited by teongpeng: Oct 9 2009, 05:36 PM

[quote=moorish,Oct 9 2009, 05:30 PM]
and my answer to you
deserve a facepalm
When can you get into the very thick skull of yours that I'm not talking about rich or poor. I'm saying that if you place a standard on a guy, the guy can also place a standard on you regardless of whether he's poor or rich.

[/quote]

I think you;ve a thicker skull, plus blind, I've edi mention so many times guys can set whatever standard they like, if they think they're worth, which they've been doing all this while anyway but afraid to admit, otherwise all the fat ugly girls wont find it a problem to get married.

but if you;re refering to my husband changing his mind after we got married then its a problem, coz he convinced me he love me deeply just as I convinced him I dun treat him like an ATM machine.

[/quote]

OK. If you have agreed then I have nothing to say. Just make sure you don't whine and complain later on about your husband later on ok.


This post has been edited by Drian: Oct 9 2009, 05:38 PM

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Added on October 9, 2009, 5:46 pmyu still dun understand is it you're a miracle

you mean in future I cannot complaint if he leave me coz I dun look young and beautiful anymore? of coz I can, if thats the case then if he runs low then I'm supposed to leave him for a richer guy...I really lost you there

This post has been edited by moorish: Oct 9 2009, 05:46 PM

Sorry I don't hold the same view . It's the same thing as both are expectations. I'm not disagreeeing with money getting you security.

I'm saying if she expects financial capability in a guy , a guy can also expect beauty in a girl and if SHE CANNOT provide it in the future, and IF the HUSBAND go out have an affair because she no longer provide the beauty then she CANNNOT complain about it.
Again nothing to do with rich or not, it's more like you EXPECT you have to GIVE. If you can't GIVE, you can't EXPECT. If you want to EXPECT and not GIVE, you can't complain. Period.

I find so many flaws in you


I didnt marry a shallow guy, same as I wont leave him when he runs low

If you can leave a guy because they are not financially secure enough why can't a guy do the same to you if you're not pretty enough ? Who are you, that the rules must be skewed to your benefit?

If you think you can at the age of 45 please go ahead. Please please do. Lets see which rich guy will accept an old divorcee.

error 404,
you're arguing later leave you because you;re no more beautiful, this is the part about rich and poor guys chances of happening is the same.

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Added on October 9, 2009, 5:59 pmOh gosh when and where have you got the idea that I will leave my husband if he runs low????
you're taking so much of my time, I told you I didnt want to debate with you anymore because you;re shooting blanks, and facepalm to myself really why I still do it

This post has been edited by moorish: Oct 9 2009, 05:59 PM

what if i said he's working hard to be a troll in here, what does he deserve ?

debbiey (spelling?), you say this...



... and then you claim you didn't say that you were right. Care to translate? What I understand from the statement above is that since tp is the only man that understands what "life" means, the rest of us don't. Hence you are right since you agree that tp is right. What am I missing here?

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Added on October 9, 2009, 6:38 pm

Afraid? I don't think that's an accurate description at all. At most, you are making a very big assumption. Just as you think it's fine for a women to live off a man, why can't you accept that some men don't appreciate that some women set out from day 1 to look for a rich man to support her?

Once again, a major assumption. So everyone who doesn't subscribe to your philosophy, is a loser with no ambition? Your arguments need to hold a little more water. So only poor sods don't want to be taken advantaged of, or leeched off? All rich guys on the other hand, don't mind? Think I need to repeat myself. Noob picked up on it but it seems some missed out. Guys don't mind taking care of their wives, heck I aim to. What we don't appreciate is someone expecting to be totally dependant on us. It's different if we offer.

Moorish, I'd appreciate it if you could address this so I can better understand, thanks.



This post has been edited by Duke Red: Oct 9 2009, 06:40 PM

actually,

some girls are money minded

some girls are not

some guys layan money minded

some guys don't.


itu saje kan? why talk until so long =.=

Its actually fun reading this debate. The passion between debby and poyozer and moorish..inc salience. I think if u all would meet together on the streets you could be great friends.