i also have a 5years + relationship. gonna be the seventh month tomorrow. He told me that he needs time to consider whether still want to be with me or not. everything is just so complicated. i'm not sure what is the main reason that causes him feel wants to leave me.

we were staying together since last year and we study in the same college in kl. we're happy although sometimes we would have argument. i am in my hometown for my training now, this week is the forth week. he said that when he needs me the most, i'm always not around.

these few days he said he's in bad mood and i know when he is bad mood, he doesn't want to talk to anyone including me. Plus he is having exams, so i think he is too stress. i look for him, he said he got no mood to talk to me, so i left him alone. After that, when he looks for me i already got no mood to reply him. then he said, when he needs me i'm not there for him. i'm so sad, he asked me not to look for him but why he say me liddat? Afterall, i still look for him after some time. i'm not sure what's going on, he keeps ignoring me these days. Today, he doesn't even sms/call me, yet he only reject my calls. he said it's because he needs time to consider and stay calm that's why he doesn't want to contact me. i'm not sure if there's mis-communicate or misunderstanding or because i'm not in kl? Or he is just tired of us always quarreling. i know i'm wrong as i always being too suspicious because he ever lied to me so many times before. i don't know what to do. but i really love him, i've cried so times whenever i think that he wanna leave me. i can't sleep well can't eat well i don't even have mood to work and i cried today when i was working. last night i even dreamt he had planned to breakup with me, i couldn't even sleep well after the nightmare woke me up. i wanna try to prepare for the worst answer from him, i know i will collapse if he really decides to leave me. i pray that the nightmare is not coming to haunt me.

What can i do? i sms/call him he ignore me. yesterday he just called me and told me that give him time alone and don't look for him anymore and stop sms him. i'm feeling so sad, holding my tears day and night. today i sms him as well and call him, but he never reply or pick up. i hope we can talk it out, but he's not giving me even one chance. i feel like we're lack of communicate. i miss him a lot, what should i do as he keeps ignoring me?
i found that everytime when problems occur between us, i don't know how he does, but he will make me feel guilty and like everything is my fault.
i also feel he's escaping the problems. or he's just too tired to face it.

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Added on May 13, 2010, 6:51 pmThanks. i will stay calm and cool, but say is easy.. i still always cry alone in room. he's ignoring me yet still haven't give me an answer. i'm impatient already..i look for him also useless cos he won't even bother me. Guys, just wanna ask, do you all need such a long time to consider to continue or give up a relationship?

This post has been edited by bbcheryl: May 13 2010, 06:51 PM

after read the posts you guys posted, everything is just mess up in my mind now. i don't know what should i do. maybe i just need a break. but thanks for those who is supporting me. at least i feel better when i speak out the words in my heart and listen to ur opinions. before this, i kept everything with myself and it makes me feel so worse. what should i do to cheer myself up?

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Added on May 13, 2010, 7:24 pmhe has finished his exam today. but still same, no response from him. actually, i just want to know whether he still loves me or not. if his heart isn't with me already, there's no point for me to stay.

This post has been edited by bbcheryl: May 13 2010, 07:24 PM

no no, don't have to apologize. i didn't mean that you can't share ur point of view with me. u know what? this happened last night before i went to bed.. i called him, he answered. i was damn nervous as he finally picked up my call..i remind myself to talk nicely.

me: hello? (no response from him) you still haven't sleep yet?
him: why you still look for me, didn't i tell you i just want to be alone?!
me: i know, but i just miss u a lot..
him: miss me...a laa a laa a laa!!!!
me: remember to eat... * there.. he hung up*

isn't that obvious? he is treating me the way so cruel and cold blooded. he has changed so much like i don't even know him anymore. i was so hurt.

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Added on May 14, 2010, 6:49 pmwe can't sit down to talk is because i'm not in kl with him now. but i thought we can talk through phone rite? forget it, he didn't even giving me one chance. i feel like giving up, but whenever i think about my kl life with him..i just couldn't end it up. let me explain my 'kl life'. as i mentioned we have been staying together since last year, almost one year already.. we always stick together and he will send and pick me up from college everyday. we talk everything, we share everything. i'm doing training in my hometown now, actually i didn't want to go back hometown to do training, but he asked me to. ok, fine. i listened to him. it's only now forth week of my training, our relationship just suddenly gone so worse. After tenth week of training, i'm gonna go back to kl continue my studies. all my stuffs are still at his house. everytime i think about moving out, i just couldn't.. he's the only closest to me. i'm afraid even when i go back kl, i can't even concentrate on my studies already. i will i know collapse *sigh*

This post has been edited by bbcheryl: May 14 2010, 06:50 PM

i know i have to be independent. but it's so hard for me to even think of it. until now, i still can't believe everything has become so worse. our happy moments are still so fresh in my mind that like just happened yesterday. it's really hard for me to accept.. it's 5years+, we even talked about getting married after graduate and talk about kids. our parents already met too. it's so hard i will collapse but i know i only can depend on myself to stand up again. may i ask sth? what's the reason you and your ex brokeup?

right..time heals. appreciate and thanks to vo0de3_x | oum@n and suffaxile for helping out so much. i have only a few close friends, but i don't really talk about my relationship problem with them. and they're busy with their boyfriend too. well, right..i'm still young, what for rushing? i have to heal the wound and concentrate on my studies. actually i went to 'tilik nasib' today, u guys know what is that rite? well, some ppl will believe it but some don't. the person told me that he's not my mr right and he is immature. he's just a passenger passing by in my life, no matter how long i'm gonna be with him, this relationship is gonna end still. this relationship and studies are making me too stress. i'm way being too serious in this relationship over these years. i was told that having gf for him is like for showing off. Maybe Peach88 is also right, probably he's interested in other girls. no matter what it is, i know i must accept the fact. what i need is time..

i received the answer yesterday night. i believe the reason is not because of he has another gal. but he said, if i didn't have look for him for the last few days and just left him alone, maybe he would still be with me. but because i looked for him..(maybe he felt frustrated, annoyed, exhausted). i looked for him is cos i miss him lots, but it's now all my fault! he is now already decided to give up cos i failed to leave him alone. i'm not gonna stay with him anymore, probably he might go overseas to further studies as he said he feels unhappy and stress for staying here. i couldn't sleep at all in the night and woke up early in the morning first thing i do is cry. i feel very very stress!

This post has been edited by bbcheryl: May 16 2010, 09:11 AM

thank you guys for being here for me. right, that is a stupid excuse that he had used to leave me. i know actually the main reason is he is tired of quarreling with me as he said we always argue over a small matter. because of 'trust', i was being too suspicious on him as he used to lie to me many times before. i was just insecure. whatever it is, he had decided this. i can do nothing except accepting the fact. it's really tough for me to go through this. and yet i need to settle many things i have left in his house, again i need to find accommodation before college starts. stress. i hope that.. time goes faster. i need to learn to be independent. i really really appreciate u guys for giving me encouragement, advices and be my listener.

well, i still sms him..but not so much already. i hope i can care him as a friend only. cos when i heard he cry yesterday, my heart feels pain..i know he needs my encouragement too. am i suppose to do this? i will let go of it slowly.

i'm feeling so stress. i eventually collapse in front of my family. i will cry but i will also gambatte together with you guys.

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Added on May 16, 2010, 9:18 pm
How do you know he needs your encouragement? If he does, would he be asking for a break up and telling you he is tired of everything?

you're right.. i shouldn't contact him anymore. what for? i care him he won't even bother. he's the one chose to breakup and hurt me so badly, there's no point for me to do so already. thank you BlueWind, i will learn to be strong.

This post has been edited by bbcheryl: May 16 2010, 09:18 PM

thank you guys. i reallly lov ya all. (for friends) when i need someone to listen, you all are always here for me. thanks for all the advices.. i really really appreciate..

sure. i will

yes. and i haven't even finish my word. i was trying to care about him.. but.. nevermind, he was just feeling so annoy even just listen to my voice for one second. his words and actions really do hurt me badly. but i still miss him a lot. yet there's nothing i can do. when he brokeup with me, he didn't even try to talk or discuss with me, he just decided himself and that's all. i asked for a chance, he said NO is NO. so, i seem never had a chance to speak. ppl always say, nothing is impossible? but i'm sure and i keep reminding myself, me and him is never possible ord..

i know and i'm feeling better already. i'm trying to let go bit by bit.

are u asking me? or someone else?

i put much effort and try to be happy. but sometimes still have some flashbacks and it's really hurt. he looked for me yesterday in msn and i felt my heart was so pain today, i met his mom.. she didn't talk much to me anymore unlike last time.. she used to talk a lot. i'm sad but i don't cry

thank you BlueWind, at least i don't cry so much ord. i will be strong

Thank you. i'm putting much effort and i can feel i'm recovering.

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Added on May 23, 2010, 2:07 pm"If someone you love hurts you cry a river, build a bridge, and get over it."



This post has been edited by bbcheryl: May 23 2010, 02:07 PM

sometimes i wonder why..why must those stupid dumpers can be so cruel..
how can they just leave like that? like nothing happen

i do understand that i can't force him and i can't do anything anymore. There's no moving backwards but it's just so hard to move on sometimes. All i have to do now is stop having feelings on him. i believe when i don't love him anymore, that's the time i'll be fully recovered. but i wonder how long do i neeD? there's no answer.