Welcome Guest ( Log In | Register )

119 Pages « < 104 105 106 107 108 > » Bottom

Outline · [ Standard ] · Linear+

Serious HOW TO GET OVER A BROKEN RELATIONSHIP, Post all "getting over" advice here

views
     
SUSdinoxzkiller
post Nov 16 2014, 08:53 PM

Casual
***
Junior Member
309 posts

Joined: Jan 2014
From: kuala lumpur


QUOTE(noonies_naruto @ Nov 16 2014, 07:43 PM)
i see. so thats why u said the thing u said. Sorry, now I know your circumstances then onli i feel for you.

Cannot think about suicide lar. We must first love love love ourselves first before loving others.

U only love others because you want to make yourself happy, if theres no reason to suffer then u probably wont even bother.

Point is, its because how we value ourselves is the reason why we act in certain2 ways. Thinking about suicide is a big contradiction to that.

We must be strong. I know you are strong. I can see the way u write things. Those words come from a strong heart.

Lucky? i said that becoz.. well.. some people.. always get a very nice2 relationship until can marry. Some dont even need to try hard to get the ones they love,

because most of the time, the one they have a crush for also has a crush for them. Maybe coz they're handsome/beautiful, cute, etc, while others

just have to spend extra extra effort to obtain that.
*
because he occupy my mind 100 percent laugh.gif .i think abt him every sec sweat.gif .i was deep in sadness - cant think anything plus he always hurt me ,scolding me bla 2 .he say i shameless ,crazy .but he dun know how hurtful do i feel when he hurt me that i end up showing my sadness using revenge in the past .everyone say he dun deserve my love but he eidi occupy my mind 100 percent ...........

sounds like my hot hot cousin bro who marry his hot first gf laugh.gif .eeh ,lots of ppl say i am good looking .yea ,he choose me because he say i am good looking .but just because i am good looking .to be honest , i think he love himself the most cool.gif
noonies_naruto
post Nov 16 2014, 09:04 PM

Enthusiast
*****
Senior Member
736 posts

Joined: Jul 2010


QUOTE(dinoxzkiller @ Nov 16 2014, 09:53 PM)
because he occupy my mind 100 percent  laugh.gif .i think abt him every sec  sweat.gif .i was deep in sadness - cant think anything plus he always hurt me ,scolding me bla 2 .he say i shameless ,crazy .but he dun know how hurtful do i feel when he hurt me that i end up showing my sadness using revenge in the past .everyone say he dun deserve my love but he eidi occupy  my mind 100 percent ...........

sounds like my hot hot cousin bro who marry his hot first gf  laugh.gif .eeh ,lots of ppl say i am good looking .yea ,he choose me because he say i am good looking .but just because i am good looking .to be honest , i think he love himself the most  cool.gif
*
Its a phase la. Now u can say things like these.. sum more quite recent right..

nvmind lah.. time will heal ... But seriously, u dont let urself get scolded or get called names etc. Puhlease.. he on ur mind every second?

How about u? R u on his mind every second? What is stopping u from realizing? If he truly loves you he wont be scolding u blahblahblah like that.

In the end. Its memang just u. U refuse to flip the switch. that hopeful switch. Just flip it. And you will feel fresh like a new woman!

I know la. Love is illogical. You do things without thinking. But come on, until consider suicide? come on. Dont u have any other people who love you?

You prepared to disappoint them? Not like they wan u to become damn career woman also, they just want to still see you around them.

Dont suffer because of love. Take full control of yourself.

Learn to appreciate yourself. Sit down and think and figure out who values who the most. And who values themselves.

Rooting for you babe.

This post has been edited by noonies_naruto: Nov 16 2014, 09:06 PM
SUSdinoxzkiller
post Nov 16 2014, 09:53 PM

Casual
***
Junior Member
309 posts

Joined: Jan 2014
From: kuala lumpur


QUOTE(noonies_naruto @ Nov 16 2014, 10:04 PM)
Its a phase la. Now u can say things like these.. sum more quite recent right..

nvmind lah.. time will heal ... But seriously, u dont let urself get scolded or get called names etc. Puhlease.. he on ur mind every second?

How about u? R u on his mind every second? What is stopping u from realizing? If he truly loves you he wont be scolding u blahblahblah like that.

In the end. Its memang just u. U refuse to flip the switch. that hopeful switch. Just flip it. And you will feel fresh like a new woman!

I know la. Love is illogical. You do things without thinking. But come on, until consider suicide? come on. Dont u have any other people who love you?

You prepared to disappoint them? Not like they wan u to become damn career woman also, they just want to still see you around them.

Dont suffer because of love. Take full control of yourself.

Learn to appreciate yourself. Sit down and think and figure out who values who the most. And who values themselves.

Rooting for you babe.
*
actually ,that cruel incident happens abt 4 months ago unsure.gif .then he hurt me again by scolding me 2 weeks ago unsure.gif .he asked his fren to stalk me for months online .he stalk me as well .i get mad and called .scolded him ,then he scold me even more worse unsure.gif .then he msg me saying he got new gf .i lock myself in the toilet after that .if i force myself dun think abt him ,then i suffer from headache

no need keep on repeat saying he dun love me laugh.gif .i am mentally and physically sick that time .nvm ,u dun understand cool.gif .


noonies_naruto
post Nov 16 2014, 10:44 PM

Enthusiast
*****
Senior Member
736 posts

Joined: Jul 2010


QUOTE(dinoxzkiller @ Nov 16 2014, 10:53 PM)
actually ,that cruel incident happens abt 4 months ago  unsure.gif .then he hurt me again by scolding me 2 weeks ago  unsure.gif .he asked his fren to stalk me for months online .he stalk me as well .i get mad and called .scolded him ,then he scold me even more worse  unsure.gif .then he msg me saying he got new gf .i lock myself in the toilet after that .if i force myself dun think abt him ,then i suffer from headache

no need keep on repeat saying he dun love me  laugh.gif .i am mentally and physically sick that time .nvm ,u dun understand  cool.gif .
*
and right now?

How r u feeling now?

Any better?
munkeyflo
post Nov 17 2014, 12:52 PM

Blooop bloop bloop
Group Icon
Staff
2,797 posts

Joined: Nov 2007
From: On the beach


All general issues/advice/topics on your broken hearts are to be posted here.
lcyeap90
post Nov 22 2014, 01:46 AM

Casual
***
Junior Member
392 posts

Joined: Jul 2005
From: car junk...


QUOTE(Searizeel @ Nov 15 2014, 02:24 AM)
» Click to show Spoiler - click again to hide... «
QUOTE(emikoshirantori @ Nov 15 2014, 11:15 AM)
If she can be easily influence by words and not by facts, I doubt she had much feelings towards it. Talking from experience, sometimes, girls tend to find securities else where if she cant get from you, or somehow as the older generation said, it may be just puppy love. Still time to main and fool around while u r still young.
Thanks.
apparently mentioned earlier i broke off my 12 yrs of relationship from finding truth of my ex cheated on me. So now we are somewhat on the cooling stage. But trust me, the longer you drag the cooling stage, everything will fade off. If you intend to save whatever last bits of love you two have, better act as fast as you could.
*
So I have chosen the path to try to save the relationship. We still have some casual texts and meet up. I tried not to initiate to find her in a new day but she did it. Few days ago she invited me for a lunch which I felt surprise as she will date me out. It was just a short lunch session, but we still act like a couple. doh.gif

The next day morning after the lunch, I gave her a sudden call in the morning when the time she was driving to work. I knew she has a habit to have phone chat during the driving time. Apparently my phone shown I am in the call waiting. After a few calls, she picked up my call and told me she didn't realised the call as she put the phone in vibration mode which in fact she lied. I confront her with the call waiting stuff and we get into kinda bad mood which always happen when we discuss our issue. After few minutes of chat, she hung up my call and she continue to have another call again(my phone shown me). I do not assume who is the one she on call during our conversation thou. We had a few text afterwards and she gave me the reason "I don't want you to feel sad, that's why I did so'.

I started don't know what I am doing all these while. Is it still worthwhile for me to save the relationship? The way she lied to me was so natural and I may really believe it if my phone didn't show me the call waiting notification. sad.gif
cybpsych
post Nov 22 2014, 09:33 AM

---------------------
*********
All Stars
65,264 posts

Joined: Jan 2003
QUOTE(lcyeap90 @ Nov 22 2014, 01:46 AM)
So I have chosen the path to try to save the relationship. We still have some casual texts and meet up. I tried not to initiate to find her in a new day but she did it. Few days ago she invited me for a lunch which I felt surprise as she will date me out. It was just a short lunch session, but we still act like a couple. doh.gif

The next day morning after the lunch, I gave her a sudden call in the morning when the time she was driving to work. I knew she has a habit to have phone chat during the driving time. Apparently my phone shown I am in the call waiting. After a few calls, she picked up my call and told me she didn't realised the call as she put the phone in vibration mode which in fact she lied. I confront her with the call waiting stuff and we get into kinda bad mood which always happen when we discuss our issue. After few minutes of chat, she hung up my call and she continue to have another call again(my phone shown me). I do not assume who is the one she on call during our conversation thou. We had a few text afterwards and she gave me the reason "I don't want you to feel sad, that's why I did so'.

I started don't know what I am doing all these while. Is it still worthwhile for me to save the relationship? The way she lied to me was so natural and I may really believe it if my phone didn't show me the call waiting notification. sad.gif
*
you're a good man that to think saving a r/s first, rather than bailing out unnecessarily.

'bout the call waiting, is it her habit to lie/hide things from you?

on your part, it is natural for the guy to go crazy/protective of the girl, especially when she's not picking up phone, left you wondering/overthinking, etc etc. sometimes, she's just busy or was on something else. chill bro!

it's diffiicult, but try not to overthink stuffs. if you think she's an honest girl, do a face-to-face talk about it. you both need to communicate more on deeper level, setting the expectation, putting up the right effort at the right time.

try to take a step back, look at it objectively.
lcyeap90
post Nov 22 2014, 10:37 AM

Casual
***
Junior Member
392 posts

Joined: Jul 2005
From: car junk...


QUOTE(cybpsych @ Nov 22 2014, 09:33 AM)
you're a good man that to think saving a r/s first, rather than bailing out unnecessarily.

'bout the call waiting, is it her habit to lie/hide things from you?

on your part, it is natural for the guy to go crazy/protective of the girl, especially when she's not picking up phone, left you wondering/overthinking, etc etc. sometimes, she's just busy or was on something else. chill bro!

it's diffiicult, but try not to overthink stuffs. if you think she's an honest girl, do a face-to-face talk about it. you both need to communicate more on deeper level, setting the expectation, putting up the right effort at the right time.

try to take a step back, look at it objectively.
*
It is not her habit to lie on me. But now she choose to lie to me in order to cover she was on phone call. Normally she will pick up my call if she doesnt on call with someone. But lately i seldom give her call already.

Guess I really need to have a deep talk with her to clear out all the cloud. Either to continue work on or stop.
SUSsniperz
post Nov 23 2014, 12:26 PM

Look at all my stars!!
*******
Senior Member
2,464 posts

Joined: Apr 2007
QUOTE(lcyeap90 @ Nov 22 2014, 10:37 AM)
It is not her habit to lie on me. But now she choose to lie to me in order to cover she was on phone call. Normally she will pick up my call if she doesnt on call with someone. But lately i seldom give her call already.

Guess I really need to have a deep talk with her to clear out all the cloud. Either to continue work on or stop.
*
Try to check who is she actually calling? If she keeps lying, stop wasting time on her. Let the guilt trip into and you can maybe have a heart break but find someone better.










If you don't click together, no matter what you do together, just move on. Breaking up is harsh. I came here just to say I'm going temporarily single.


And after 4 years since 2010, I got like 4 girlfriends before. One of it is LDR which is I feel don't work for almost 90% for everyone and it's bad if you never saw the person in real-life yet.


mudkipryan94
post Nov 29 2014, 06:14 PM

someone need a sarcasm meter?
********
All Stars
12,000 posts

Joined: Feb 2010
From: Banting, Puchong, KL



QUOTE(Searizeel @ Nov 14 2014, 04:05 AM)
Hi lcyeap,

1. How to regain the trust towards somebody?
First and foremost, you have to understand that there is
no such a thing as "regain trust."

» Click to show Spoiler - click again to hide... «


2. I lost my faith towards her.
How did you lose faith in her?

If you loved her so dearly, how could you even allow yourself to
think about losing faith in her?

» Click to show Spoiler - click again to hide... «


3. But I still have the urge to find her, meet her, talk to her, kiss her.
Those are couple habits that have been assimilated into your life when your
ex was still a part of your life. Habits are hard to change, but not impossible.

» Click to show Spoiler - click again to hide... «


And now,
4. The dragging.
This one-way relationship you have with her memories now will go on for as long
as you allow it to. The moment you decide that you want to throw it all away,
you'll see that you'll break free from it. It's gonna be a slowly and painful process.
But that's why you've gotta keep running the marathon.

» Click to show Spoiler - click again to hide... «


Don't worry though; the confusion is there to help keep you back in track.
Nobody can teach you how to steer forward and go full speed ahead if you
don't first jump into the car.

So the longer you stay confused, the more questions you'll answer and understand.
And when the next person shows up in your life again, you know you'll be able to
offer her a much better version of you that you could've never been if you hadn't
had that breakup before.

You'll be fine; we will all be fine. We humans are survivalists. We do what we
need to keep living. Sooner or later, we'll figure things out.

Sooner or later, you'll figure it out. And when you do good for you.
Until then, what's the rush? Deal with your feelings and questions
one at a time.

Just remember that time only answers those who ponders.
Till then, keep posting here when needed.
*
wow... shakehead.gif unbelievable truth man...
emikoshirantori
post Dec 1 2014, 09:18 AM

New Member
*
Junior Member
5 posts

Joined: Jun 2008


QUOTE(lcyeap90 @ Nov 22 2014, 01:46 AM)
So I have chosen the path to try to save the relationship. We still have some casual texts and meet up. I tried not to initiate to find her in a new day but she did it. Few days ago she invited me for a lunch which I felt surprise as she will date me out. It was just a short lunch session, but we still act like a couple. doh.gif

The next day morning after the lunch, I gave her a sudden call in the morning when the time she was driving to work. I knew she has a habit to have phone chat during the driving time. Apparently my phone shown I am in the call waiting. After a few calls, she picked up my call and told me she didn't realised the call as she put the phone in vibration mode which in fact she lied. I confront her with the call waiting stuff and we get into kinda bad mood which always happen when we discuss our issue. After few minutes of chat, she hung up my call and she continue to have another call again(my phone shown me). I do not assume who is the one she on call during our conversation thou. We had a few text afterwards and she gave me the reason "I don't want you to feel sad, that's why I did so'.

I started don't know what I am doing all these while. Is it still worthwhile for me to save the relationship? The way she lied to me was so natural and I may really believe it if my phone didn't show me the call waiting notification. sad.gif
*
Its good that you are trying to save the relationship. Well, we do not know why she want to lie about the call thing but could it be that she chose to lie due to you two always argue over small matters? Or she didn't want to explain herself to you?
mudkipryan94
post Dec 14 2014, 10:59 PM

someone need a sarcasm meter?
********
All Stars
12,000 posts

Joined: Feb 2010
From: Banting, Puchong, KL



QUOTE(emikoshirantori @ Dec 1 2014, 09:18 AM)
Its good that you are trying to save the relationship. Well, we do not know why she want to lie about the call thing but could it be that she chose to lie due to you two always argue over small matters? Or she didn't want to explain herself to you?
*
I think better both also need to explained it as well ... and lie, is a serious business on relationship yo..
emikoshirantori
post Dec 15 2014, 01:58 PM

New Member
*
Junior Member
5 posts

Joined: Jun 2008


QUOTE(mudkipryan94 @ Dec 14 2014, 10:59 PM)
I think better both also need to explained it as well ... and lie, is a serious business on relationship yo..
*
True, but majority chose to lie over a matter to cover it up so that they think they can get pass it without any explanation for themselves
debbieyss
post Dec 27 2014, 01:06 PM

Look at all my stars! I want to be a SUPERSTAR!
*******
Senior Member
4,458 posts

Joined: Nov 2008
From: Kuala Lumpur


I have spent 4 years to get over it and in fact, I'm not sure if I have really got over it.
cybpsych
post Dec 27 2014, 01:19 PM

---------------------
*********
All Stars
65,264 posts

Joined: Jan 2003
QUOTE(debbieyss @ Dec 27 2014, 01:06 PM)
I have spent 4 years to get over it and in fact, I'm not sure if I have really got over it.
*
There is no definite closure until u decided to move on and find someone new.

Only then, the previous chapter is closed. Else, it'll be just lingering there to haunt you. You deserve better, must always be strong and +ve about yourself.

Take care!~
debbieyss
post Dec 27 2014, 01:22 PM

Look at all my stars! I want to be a SUPERSTAR!
*******
Senior Member
4,458 posts

Joined: Nov 2008
From: Kuala Lumpur


QUOTE(cybpsych @ Dec 27 2014, 01:19 PM)
There is no definite closure until u decided to move on and find someone new.

Only then, the previous chapter is closed. Else, it'll be just lingering there to haunt you. You deserve better, must always be strong and +ve about yourself.

Take care!~
*
I did start a new relationship 3 years later but I was thinking of him when I was with this 2nd bf; when we went to places that I went with him before, my head was just about moments that we spent.

In the end I broke up with the 2nd bf.
cybpsych
post Dec 27 2014, 04:14 PM

---------------------
*********
All Stars
65,264 posts

Joined: Jan 2003
QUOTE(debbieyss @ Dec 27 2014, 01:22 PM)
I did start a new relationship 3 years later but I was thinking of him when I was with this 2nd bf; when we went to places that I went with him before, my head was just about moments that we spent.

In the end I broke up with the 2nd bf.
*
gosh, that's one burden that you shouldnt be carrying all these while. it's not even a fair responsibility anymore, why waste it to someone that doesnt deserve you?

hope you're slowly moving on.
rainbubbles
post Dec 30 2014, 08:18 PM

New Member
*
Newbie
2 posts

Joined: Feb 2014
I feel the same as debbieyss. I have spent a year hypnotizing myself; but I turned out still unable to forget it. The pain still feels so raw. I tried moving on, but it never worked.
cybpsych
post Dec 30 2014, 09:14 PM

---------------------
*********
All Stars
65,264 posts

Joined: Jan 2003
QUOTE(rainbubbles @ Dec 30 2014, 08:18 PM)
I feel the same as debbieyss. I have spent a year hypnotizing myself; but I turned out still unable to forget it. The pain still feels so raw. I tried moving on, but it never worked.
*
how long have you been holding onto that pain?

sooner or later, u gotta let go the burden. any expectation that you setup personally?
rainbubbles
post Dec 30 2014, 11:42 PM

New Member
*
Newbie
2 posts

Joined: Feb 2014
Probably it was the hope, or the regrets of " what ifs?". We have been together for a very long time, we almost got married and all. I just couldn't believe he just let us go for his own ego. And I couldn't believe I am even stupider to actually not let go despite all the effort to move on.

119 Pages « < 104 105 106 107 108 > » Top
 

Change to:
| Lo-Fi Version
0.0298sec    0.61    6 queries    GZIP Disabled
Time is now: 30th November 2025 - 02:10 AM