we met up today, but in a group. throughout the few hours, i notice he was keeping an eye on me and he tried to talk to me too. of course i react normal towards everything. i had great fun with my friends, i notice he looked at me when i laugh and when i was talking to others. i thought i might react differently but i do not know why i enjoyed myself during the outing. i do not intend to pretend but i do not know why, i think i am feeling much better and really willing to let go.

at the moment, i will not deny that i have quite many guys after me. i am not too sure what do i want. so i just remain as friends with them, furthermore i prefer to really overcome myself for everything before i start a new relationship with any other guys. i do not want to be unfair for anyone else and at the end, i will only get extra hurts.

i do not know if i will be meeting up with him that often. i bought him a christmas present but i am still thinking how should i pass it to him? should i give it to him or should i not? i was thinking to ask him out for a dinner and give him the present but i am not too sure if it is appropriate for me to do that.

i did not just pretend to be normal or purposely act to be normal but i was just easy with it. i admit it was slightly out of my own expectation for my reaction too. anyway, i think i am just fine with most of it right now.

i do not know. i know that it is something that he will want and needs to get. but i do not know if it is appropriate for me to get him. i do get a christmas present for all my close friends but i am not too sure if i want to give it to him.

i think i just do not want him to think that i am wanting something more than a friend. i know he has that thought about me since we broke up because i was quite dependent on him last time as i could not let go of him. i just do not want him to feel that i am irritating and disturbing, and most important, he tries his way to avoid me.

yes, i will just give it to him and may be have a talk with him regarding about something in between me and him. or may be i will choose not to but anyhow i just do not want to think anything extra anymore.

I met him again, one to one. I gave him the present and we had a heart to heart talk. After all, I'm quite happy because I do not feel the heartache like I used to have when I met him earlier after we broke up. This time around, he too noticed that I am much happier, most important, I am doing quite well for my career.

I am surprised with myself too, that I can stand upright again so fast. I gave him a diary planner which he said it is quite nice. I purposely wrote down all the important dates that he needs to remember such as birthday and those mother's day and etc for him to copy it into the diary, because I think it is not so appropriate for me to write in the diary planner. I just hope it is useful for him.

Anyway, we kissed but I do not have the heartbeat feeling anymore... so I think I am pretty good in my recovery from the broken heart. At this moment, I will not want to get into any relationship until I think I am really ready for it.

thank you geekster.

I actually do wonder too if I am bad for showing him that I can live better without him. I could remember the way he looked at me on that night was different, he was really surprise and kept looking into my eyes. When I've received a message, he wanted to know who and what was it about, and he teased on me about new relationship. But I made it very clear that we are nothing more than a best friend.

We are going for movie again, somewhat I am now feeling nothing about it if he is there or not. Sometimes I do wonder how he thinks and feels but overall I can't be bothered much anymore.


Christmas? I do have plans for myself!

Dremax, you have us here. If you need a shoulder, I have two ready for you.

I came back from a movie with him. Today I changed a new look and he was surprised. I notice that he was paying attention for everything I said and as well I did. Anyway, I just did not bother much about that but enjoyed myself with the friends and movie. I just know that, I can not be bothered much about what he thinks and what he wants anymore. I know, I can live better without him in my life.

I know I do not need this thread for myself to cure the broken heart anymore, because I am having a better heart now. I do not give myself "time" as the excuse to mingle in the past but I know I just can do it. But I will still come here because here is the place accompany me gone through the hell and toughest time in my life.

Thank you Baronic. Is he kicking himself or not I am not too sure, but I know he wants to go out some more since he asked to call him again for movie. He left something with me, claimed that he forgot about it so asked me to keep till we meet the next time to give him.

Geekster, I do not know what is there in my character that you admired. I am just a simple girl learning to grow and hope to be someone better. Life is all about falling down and standing up. This is a repeatable process in life. It is depending on individual how long we want to take to complete the process. I choose not to waste time, since it was already hurt, there is nothing for me to lose anymore.

The thread isn't any medication for anyone's heart, we are the medicine for our own sickness. Wasting time or not, I think it is all depend on individual. Yes, I stand up very fast after my break up but it doesn't mean I've wasted any time for that matter. Overall, I prefer to take it as a different experience in life for us to grow wiser and be a better person. If you really want to say waste time, well I guess that relationship which came to be a sad ending already wasted our time right? Anyhow, just think positively and we will feel the great energy in us.

I can understand how you feel but for me I told myself something that, it's all fine because before I met him, even though I fell sick I could have get myself recover and felt better. I fell sick the other day too, badly but when I think of him, I thank him for giving me a chance to learn to be more independent so I can handle myself better in the future. Dremax, everything in this world has two sides, it is depending on us which side that we pick. If you have a choice, pick the positive and good side where you will feel better and your thinking will be wiser too. Sometimes, it's not lying to yourself. I am not asking you to deny the fact of loneliness and sadness occur in you, but to ask you face it in a different point of view. As I said, I was sad too, and I do think of him from now and then but the difference I make is, I take it differently.

I used to take all the blames on myself for everything but not now anymore. That's what I told him the other day that, I do not want to say sorry to him anymore but only thank you for everything. It was not our problem in the break up but I do not want to find anyone's fault into it too. Now I've learnt, whenever you need to say a sorry, try to use the thank you to replace. It makes a big difference in life.

D-zire, yes you are right. It is so easy to fall in love but maintaining is not easy, the worst will be the falling out of love. No matter what it is, we do need the support from everyone. Sometimes a smile to the strangers makes a different too! When a relationship fails, I think I'm glad that I've gained extra knowledge and experience in life.

Dremax, it is good to see you feel better. Sometimes, do not hope but just do it. I wasted a month time to hope that the relation in between me and him could get better; I wasted a month time to hope for a miracle to happen but whatever it is, I know it is all depends on myself what I actually want to do, and what I can do.

A change must come from one before the other, but it is you yourself to decide if you want to change. I did nothing but to pour out all my thoughts here to share with people. There are people think it is nonsense but it might be useful for certain people. It is depending on you, when you feel like taking it to place it at the useful side.

You've already fallen down, perhaps deep down. You've already suffer from the pain, perhaps deep pain. Is this the time for you to stand up, it is all depends on you. Standing up might be painful too but since you are already in deep pain after a fall, so why is there to bother if it's painful to stand up? After all, apply the right medicine for your wound, you will be able to run like no body's business again.

I can see how silly you are in relationship. No money no talk? Then why you are here to talk? See, relationship is relationship; money is money. No doubt we need money in everything but it does not mean money can buy a relationship. There are silly people out there to go for monetary but are they really serious and commit into relationship? You can get the answer by yourself.

Anyone who is serious to carry on a relationship with you, will not look into money first but your personality and as well the chemical reaction. If you've got cheated by a girl before, that's your sad story and I feel sorry for that, but it does not mean all girls after you are for money.

For me, money is nothing compare to a true love.

Compromise? It takes both parties to work it out together. Is there such a thing call against the principle? I think that is quite a ridiculous question to ask anyone, isn't it? How much willing a person sacrifice towards whatever principle the person holds, it is all depends on the situation, environment and so on, it does not mean one will not do now but will never do it in the future. Furthermore, what is the point to know if how much willing a person to go to give in into a relationship? Do not tell me it is for measurement purpose, is there such a thing to be measured in relationship?

nlgoh, so how was the meet up? I think I am quite happy and also enjoy my life for now. Honestly if now ask me again if I will want to be with him again or not, I will answer straight off the face, NO! He called and we had a talk, he was surprised with my current progress at work and career but I did not bother much. He seems to pretend to forget the things he left with me on the other day, and now I just want to get rid of it because I do not want extra thigns in my room but not having the intention to meet him more often anymore!

geekster thank you! Merry Christmas to you too! I can foresee I am going to have a great 2010 for everything that I've planned out for myself. I am looking forward to carry out a better year for myself with all the goals and achievements I've set up few days ago. I noticed that when I was with him, it seems everything that I've planned were all related to him, and I was wondering how could I breath when I did not reserve any room for myself. Somewhat I think he is going to miss me due to the Christmas present that I've given to him. Anyway, I shall let him suffers a bit.

Since geekster is here sharing, I also post up some of my experience after the break up.

After the break up I was very down but I occupied myself with very heavy workload, and I tried to get back to my old friends who were there for me all the while until I hurt them so badly. I confessed to them about everything in my mind at that moment even I cried in front of everyone but I just could not bother much.

I spoke to him, to make myself a very clear picture and as well to ensure I do not hold anything towards him anymore. After that I took a day down to slack while I was flashing back everything ever since I was small, then I list down all my dreams since small, as well the goals I wanted to achieve in my life. After listing out everything, I started to make plan for myself. I think "myself" this word is very useful and important because it helps me to realize it is so important for me to love myself and plan things for myself first.

Since I have some goals, I just put all my energy and focus towards them and meanwhile I enjoyed the companion from my friends. I do not bother how tired it was, but I just went out with them whenever I can. I did not wait for them to call me, I went to them instead. I know there is nothing will come to us without any effort at all.

I did not depend on my family because I am not the type will share sad news with them but I told my parent that I am all fine when they got the news of the break up. After all, it was not that pain at all.

Trust me, do not try. Never ever try but please, just do it. Some times you think this might help and you just think to try it, it does not work at all. You shall leave all your thoughts behind and go for it. No matter what it is, as long as it does not harm yourself and people around you, at all cost, go for it.

How long you want to take your time to cry over for someone, is you to decide. We will still be here to share as much as we can but we can never force you to stop crying. If you want to cry, yes go ahead to cry it all out loud. I did that too, I stand in front of the mirror, told myself just today I was given a chance to cry as much as I can, let it be the next day my eyes would swallow like an egg, just cry but not anymore after that. I will only drop my tears now for the real sad people like orphans or any dead cases rise in my family or else, too happy.

In the first post of Baronic said is very true, don't think and try, just do

My dear, it happened the same like mine too but the only difference is, he is not after any other girl and I have not accept any of the guys tackling me. I can understand how you feel. The kisses and hugs feeling so lovely and warm right?

Anyway, I have not come over here to check out in this after my last post. I was busy but I think I could make it to the extend of not to think about him at all for at least a week. I am sure you can do it too if you want to. I am not too sure about you and him, but for me it was something that I felt it will not work it out that well anymore. We had already broke up, within the two to three months time again we patch back. It shows to me that it might not be a good decision. So I just want a long break and who knows I might be able to get someone that I really wanted or may be after a rest, we can work things out better.

I will not deny after the broke up, I was hoping for a patch back and I was so silly that I still willingly to sacrifice for him. Sadly, I've awaken from the dream that is not realistic at all.

It is not appropriate for me to tell you what to do, perhaps you will be the better person? I will suggest you to leave everything off here, and take a break to a place you want to go the most. To the beach or anywhere else then enjoy yourself there. Off the handphone and turn off internet or whatever communication tool, may be you will be able to get your answer. I did that, and it works on me

Lately, I've hardly talk to him. I don't know but I think I am quite used to it when he is no longer around me. Somehow he seems to be interested to know about my condition when we talk over the MSN. I think, I just don't care much anymore.

Is life happier? I think so, I just try my best to do whatever I want to do and he was surprised for my progress where he was thinking that I couldn't get up that fast.

The other day he said those guys are not suitable for me, asked me not to think about them when I was jokingly mentioned about some guys. Well, how will anyone knows if anyone is suitable f or me?

It is hard, when you refused to turn the page. I've shared my experience in the earlier post. I was like you too, hanging at the situation where with the so-called best friend tag he offered, I thought we would have a chance to patch back, I still stupidly did a lot for him but when I decided to really let go, I do find that it's so easy to have a new life for myself.

I don't say that we shall forget the memories we had, no matter good or bad, that's it. There isn't anything that gonna changed or anything that we would've done to change the past. Just leave it there, thanks him for the great memories but now it's time for you to start venture a new life of yours for yourself.

Trust me, don't think, just do it. There isn't anyone can't live without anyone at all. We are here for ourselves, not for anyone else

Thanks Baronic, I actually told him that, no matter suitable or not, it will be me to decide. I just thank him for the so-called opinion and after that, shut him off.

Actually, now only I realize he still cares about me a lot but I think it's too late I'm not going to start a new relationship now or anytime soon but I am not thinking back of patch back with him at all.

@Lost, I was like that too, felt so miserable and I even had the thought of commit suicide. I missed him so badly and I cried myself to sleep every night for the first 2 weeks. After that I ran away to places where I wanted to go alone, to cool myself off. I can say, somehow I found myself stupid because I live for someone else but not myself. I work very hard now but not for me to forget him, it was for myself to achieve my own goals. I set goals for myself to achieve, and those goals are all about me, no longer about anyone else. May be this sound selfish but seriously, we are here for ourselves, it's our life and why shall we live for someone else?

My dear, you can do a lot, I'm very sure that you can. I know I took a very short period to recover and stand upright again but it does not mean I was not serious with him and I did not love him that much. I think I've learnt a lesson, which is love myself more before I love anyone else. I think now I'm happier because I'm doing everything that I want to do for myself. Even everyone leaves you, you still have "I", "myself" and "me" for you to remind yourself who is the closest to you.

Of course, I still love people around me and I enjoy to be with them. I captured some pictures lately and I compared with those pictures that I took when I was with him, I think, I smile better and look nicer now compare to the past.

Dear Lost,

I think, he once said, I'm his soul mate and no one else will ever able to replace my position in his heart. Even after we broke up, he wanted us to be best friend and I will always be the closest to him. I thought, I would just be doing that for him but sadly, I can say, he was just selfish and I was stupid.

My dear, whatever both of you have agree when both of you were in the relationship, it stays there. Sometimes we also said we only love someone forever but no one else, can it be really that true? Like I've said, no point to just walk away, you can never walk away from anything that had happened. Just face it. I'm sure you can do it. Sometimes, we just need to think twice for ourselves first. It's possible to be friend, even as like now, I still talk to him like good friend but I will not put him first in everything I do. I'm being his friend as because I don't mind and I am happy to be his friend. No more the silly me for being there for him just because of him.

We are all strong and weak at the same time. Ourselves determine how our life want to be. It is not me telling you that it is possible, but you yourself. I'd like to say, don't just say try or think you can try, but just do it. Instead of telling yourself that you will try to be happier, may be telling yourself that you are happier will make a change.

Nothing is going to change, we are the one who make the changes

It happened to me too! About a week or two we broke up, I fell sick and he scolded me when he found out. I just kept quiet and did not say anything but I told myself, he isn't anyone to scold me for being sick or healthy. So what I did, I actually purposely make myself much more healthier and even I was sick, I pretended to be super happy. I updated my facebook and MSN with that. I did not bother much for what he said. After few days he came to me to ask about my condition, I purposely tease him back to say that I'm perfectly good, but only I was a bit not well due to the weather. Anyway, it did not affect my life at all. I am still as happy as a lark.

I know I sound bad in that but why bother so much if he scolds? Sometimes both parties take time to let go. He might still care about you at a point but why do you want to let yourself suffer longer and more just because of that?

Get well and shut his mouth for scolding you by action. I proof to him that I am much more healthier and happier without him in my life, and now he is the one who has an itchy butt. He did not appreciate me, so it's his loss now.

Good girl! Thumbs up for you! I am sure you can make it through.

We are girls who can depending on ourselves for our life, just a guy, he makes no harm towards you if he doesn't know how to appreciate you. But I don't ask you to hate anyone. Just be happy.

Now, following me and sing.... I am happy, happy as a lark!!!! I believe, I believe I can fly!!!!


My dear, give you an advice, if you find your fingers are itchy and want to contact him, just go get something to do for your fingers. It happened to me, when I felt like to open his pages and check out about him, I insisted myself to cook. So at the end I just cook and cook, forget about him. It took me like a year to pass that day. After that, it was so easy to be like this, I don't give a damn about him if he is there or not. (Yet now he is the one who has the itchy hand )

It's alright. That was just my suggestion. Just do whatever you like to do.

That's very good. I was like that too! So soon you can just forget if he is in your contact list.
Let's give yourself a big clap