If the will power is strong then one shall succeed. But at the same time, I think having some people to watch us over and pick us up when we fall is always a good thing.

Help is more to like having people to listen to us when we want to talk it out. At the very same time, take some time to hear what they have to say about it and about us. More often than not, what close friends tells us is really true about ourselves, it's just that we don't notice it until it's too late.

Crying is a normal issue. Of course I did cry myself to bed a few nights in a row, but after that I told myself, no matter how much I cry, she won't return to me again and neither would all those things I've done wrong could be undone nor would she even bother about what's happening to me now.

What is important is to pick up those pieces of your life and put them back together and reprioritize everything you want to do to get your life back in order. There's no use sitting down doing nothing about your current state when you know clearly that, there's something that must be done and some things has to change.

It does mean something though. It tells you what you shouldn't do in the future and how you should repent from all those mistakes that has caused all those pain and disappointments.

Hey there mate,

You see I've learned it the hard way back like 3 months ago. The thing is, if things doesn't work out the very first time when you and her tried to get back together, it probably won't work out anymore for the time being. That is what I find true enough. If you keep on trying to make ends meet but at the very end of it, it still frays, why go on with a losing battle? You know you ain't going to get her feelings back the way it used to be. I know it's rather harsh to say this, but we've gotta to think about the big thing not the small thing. I know to many of us, "Giving up is not an option" yes it true why give up when you know you might still have the chance to make ends work? But think of it this way, if you are in the situation where you are fighting a losing battle, giving up is the only option.

What I would suggest to you is that you take some time out for yourself say a few years or something and give the same to her. If you really want to see yourself happier each day and at the same know that she's happier each day, let her go. If you do believe in miracles, who knows, what may actually happen? You may get her back or even better you might even find yourself going out with another girl whom is much more lovely than her.

Now I understand why my mom always says "Don't get so hooked up with one girl. You have a long way to go and there are plenty more out there for you to find."

I guess every other mother out there would say the same thing to their daughters or their sons.

My recent break up was really had a big hit on me and yes, finally those words she uttered to me before finally went into my numb skull.

As for me, I didn't delete her from my FB and MSN. I just left it as it is. After all I don't really talk to her since she called it off.

Well for me... I don't really bother about the notifications that comes on on MSN and my FB. But if it helps you, it's good for you.

I used to check if she's online during the first month like Kenneth on top there. But I don't know what is his extends of his "stalking".

Care to elaborate more on your situation? Because I don't really understand your situation.

Well, as for me I didn't initiate any conversations with her. I just felt like I rather be left alone and leave her alone. Seems like I am the one that is kinda hard on myself.

Oh... Alright you broke off with her if I didn't decipher wrongly? What I would suggest you to do it not to ignore her. Just be bold and tell her that you need sometime for yourself and for herself. It could work that way.

*Wink* I am taking it easy on myself too. But I think for the mean time it should remain as it is lo. It takes time to be able to be friends again. For now I am not ready.

No wonder... My suggestion is just tell her you need some time to prioritize what you want to do and you need some time for yourself away from her (ie. taking a break from her and from the relationship). I am putting it in a way how a girl feels la. Probably I am in touch with my feminine side.

But anyway, besides that it depends on how you want to deal with her. That is only my suggestion for now.

LOL that was what I did like during my first month after she called it off for me and her. But after that, I've started to accept that fact that she's no longer mine and there's nothing I can do about it. My friends told me, if I really do still love her, just her go her own way now.

I believe in miracles. Do you?

Many things can happen right before our eyes now. But many more to come as well.

I tell myself this all these time, don't live life with doubts and with "if's and but's". Just do it, just live with it.

Well they might but in the end if he/she is really certain to be with you again the heart breaking issue won't be that often la. Anyway being in a relationship has plenty of ups and downs.

Same here. That's why... now... I don't even open her fb page, blog or even start a conversation with her on MSN because I don't want to remind myself about how things used to be.

Jealousy... Something that human can never get rid of.

Erm... Well there are a couple of ways to such as leaving a comment on every damn thing you put on your wall/photos and stuff like that.

That one I am not sure though. But I personally think, it's not such a hassle if you prefer not to bother about it.

I used to be jealous seeing her being so happy going on without me and all. But a month ago, I just don't wanna give a shyet about it, whether or not she's with another guy or what. Anyway it's doesn't concerns me anymore.

Due to the my break up, seems like now I am writing some stuff on my blog in hope to help those in grieve about getting over their relationship. In fact this afternoon I did put up something again. If you wanna check out here's the link

Actually since me and her broke off 4 months ago, I hardly spoken to her on MSN already. I just want to keep my mouth shut with her since you know it takes time for me (and I think most people with their ex-es) to accept her as a friend again.

wanna add me just type in Darren Kam and look for the one who's wearing a black blazer.

This post has been edited by DreMAx: Nov 4 2009, 06:56 PM

*sighs* Stalking won't bring them back... more often than not, they really bother what happens to us once it's over.

Most of the time? I mean it also depends on how you look at it.

For me I really prefer to be left alone to sort things out by myself rather than involving other people especially my ex.

No worries. I will add up as soon as I get yours.

People always say time heals a broken heart. I am starting to feel that magic. Actually not only she's still on my FB but some of the pictures we took together are still there. Just that I don't open those pictures I uploaded before so it doesn't hurt my feelings. Just that I am getting used to this form of loneliness.

I don't intend to delete her and really cut all connections with her. I just want to be left alone by her while I catch up with myself and yeah, pick up my shattered pieces of my life.

Apparently, I just want to ask people around here, How long would it take for you to be able to be normal friends with her again?