i'm in despress..i am broken heart n it's too hurtfull for me
itry to forget my ex as he dump me! ..even now i had a new bf..but still i love more my ex..i know its not good to love two person but the truth,i only love my ex!n for my bf now i dunno.. ..i'll do explain to him how i feel but still he waant me..n i feel guilty for him coz my heart still belong my ex..what should i do?? as my ex,we been together for 5 years..n its hard to forget him!i truely love him..n i'll try to kill myself before after we breakup.. ..it's too hard to take n till now i suffer becoz i couldn't forget him..

had a co-worker had the same problem... cried for 3 weeks almost everyday at work. Cannot produce my cheques on time, called up by the boss, went on EL (emergency leave), than annual leave, everyone tried to talk to her but she just shut down and shut out everyone.

2 mths later she's bubbly and jumping around back to life as usual.

I guess u just need more time to get over it, u need to speak to ur bf abt this problem and hopefully he will give u all the support u need to get through hard time like this.

No worries u will get over him

uh..actually its been nearly 5 months..n i still can't get over it.. ..i do talks with my bf all about it..even he listen n support me n try to make me feel better,still its doesn't work to me.. sometimes when i'm alone i will cry out..n i wil think my ex..i will ask myself..what did i done?what my mistake?what that never good bout myself that he leave me?does my love n everyting i done for him not enought??

Well u can try and occupy urself with something?

Try and do something that is not your routine... cause sometimes long relationships are like ciggarettes...
For me I just get addicted to it, feeling a bit tense I smoke, or if I am in a specific location (a usual place where I smoke) I will take out a stick and smoke.

I try to stop smoking by smoking different brands of Ciggarettes to discourage myself or change environment or work non stop at work so i dont keep thinking of smoking...

Its the same concept with relationships..

If ur Ex use to kiss ur cheek on the left, u kiss ur current on the lips
or a place that u use to hang out wif ur ex, go to some other places...
don't do things, go places that give u back memorable memories of your Ex.

If u need time to grieve do it, cry as much as u can, cry ur heart out if u must... take ur time doing it ... or go on top of a hill and shout your guts out.

things that i use to do??well many n i try much to do something else but not working..places..well i live in kl n all the place around kl,sunway..i use to go with my ex..n now my bf bring me to damansara area..but..i dunno..its feel the same..i already cry out n now i can't even cry anymore..it's difficut to say..tq for ur advice..really appriciate it..

haha... np, now going to office to be screwed by boss and work my guts out.

you take care!

things that i use to do??well many n i try much to do something else but not working..places..well i live in kl n all the place around kl,sunway..i use to go with my ex..n now my bf bring me to damansara area..but..i dunno..its feel the same..i already cry out n now i can't even cry anymore..it's difficut to say..tq for ur advice..really appriciate it..

Try forget ur ex. He dump u means he no longer love u. It is not that u both breakup for same reason. It was he dump u. Usually when a guy dump a girl means he no longer love the girl or he likes another girl.

Very hard to find a guy who can care about u and listen to u talking about ur ex. Do appriciate current bf.

try to get urself bz e.g. do charity lor.... or find new friends like us here.... i'm damn bz for the week and i still have 1 assignment to pass up tomorrow... gf sick.... and ton of work to be done...

This post has been edited by Pucca: Apr 14 2008, 07:46 AM

if you keep reminding yourself about him, then you'll never get over it..
or probably u'll take a very long time to do so..

i'm wondering.. if you still love ur ex so much why did you get urself into another relationship in such a short time?
it's unfair to your bf and also yourself.

help yourself, and start treasuring/enjoying ur new relationship, stop thinking about the past

best way to forget sumthing hurtfull is to take up new things....
my friend cured his broken heart by playing world of warcraft.....not saying you should try that but if you try doing something new im shure you can forget him faster with less tears well good luck...

Why girls like to stick to bad guys wan

Not tat girls like to stick to bad guys but most of the guys is bad and dunno to appreciate their gf and thing around them..


Dear TS,

Keep all the items that he brought for u and delete all the SMS/msg he sent u... try to clear as much as u can.. n move up as much as u can.. b fair to ur current bf.. i believe tat he's a good guy.. at least for now, when u need someone beside u he is there for u always..

Yalo, I agree he might be a good guy. C'mon, a guy can listen to u talking bout ur ex. Either that guy is too kind or that guy is dumb. Sure will get jealous in this case.

Ur ex dump u!! He's bad guy. Forget him, he not worth for u to cry and think of. He is world /b/astard. Think this way maybe u can forget him.

that's why i stick to you...


quoted for truth.

---

hey babysweet,

you know why so hard to forget your ex? because even your current bf reminds you of your ex.

you need to separate yourself from both guys. tell your current bf it's not fair like this, and you need time to think (6 months). in the beginning the 6 months will be very suffering, keep thinking of your ex, and keep feeling lonely because you have no present bf to teman you. 6 months later, if you still want your current bf, then can happily continue.

love hurts lor. but this is the best way to move forward. *hug* if you got problem then just spam lyn, we will support you

TS!

Your problem is a normal too all nowadays ppl. In short, no one here in this tread can help you.
The only solution is "YOU". What are you trying to gain from the ppl in this tread??Mayb u think of wana share your thought & sadness here but i guarantee no one here be able to help you. The ppl here cant control your mind & brain, everything is yours.

Let say, ppl here ask you to move on, let go him. Can you do it? The answer is NO!
If the ppl here ask you to forget him? Can you do it? The answer is NO!!!...Btw, remember u will never can forget a partner or a person, is whether u can "Let go or down" the partner of person. If u can forget a person, unless u became insane or loss memory.

My last advise to you is these are the roads & process for avery human require or will go through in their LIFE.....So with this process, it will bring you to a certain maturity level in your life. Learn to let go!!!!!Times will bring you there!!!

The solution starts from "YOU"...Good Luck

Yeah.. Just tell yourself to forget him. and be firm to urself. i'm trying to forget mine gak. i'm just telling/forcing myself to forget him. cry when i need to, but don't spend more than an average of half an hour everyday!! it's gotten less now, and hopefully he will be gone from my mind before I find another guy to replace him!!

maybe, just maybe, u rushed into the new relationship? i mean, did u give urself time to stay single and think of urself before going into the current one? i reckon that u need some time being single, enjoy flirting around and then start on something serious again..

but stay strong!!! the guy doesn't deserve someone like u to remember that he exists in this world!!!

Eh wai- I'm that bad meh?

Yes yes! If someone doesn't even know how to appreciate you, why waste your precious time on it?

Low self confidence in finding another partner is the key factor.

well, lets see this helps...

I was one like you... dump by someone who no longer love me...
it took me 3 years for full recovery, and now i am still so much alive and happy...

one thing i found out was, the main thing why we cant forget the ex who dumpe us is because we dont have a single idea why he did it that way, even though we have tried our best effort...

sometimes it is not that we still love him... sometimes it is the reason we cannot reason out that make us cannot move on. you have few options to forget him:

i. try to tell yourself he is no longer worth your love... what for love for someone who dont love u anymore?
ii. convince yourself you are not the reason of the breakup, he wanted it because he has his issues... not you...
iii. you can cry anytime you want... letting it out is the best way to forget an idiot *opps*

try to commit yourself to your wonderfully understanding boyfriend now... from the way your mentioned, he is much better and there for you...

no no i suiteng is better than troublesome boys

Yup, it's easier to let go if u know why he broke up with u. I'm not sure if this sound crazy. But if u do need to find out why he dumped u, just meet him for one last time & sort it out. Whatever he's going to say, just listen & don't do anything to patch back coz this will make u look cheap (no offense).

& it's true that you shouldn't be taking his words hard coz he has NO POSITION to criticize you for who you are (if he does, tat's means he's STUPID enough to like you in the first place rite?) Furthermore, no one is really at fault in a relationship, it takes two hands to clap.

& I believe you should just let go of your emotion & don't try to be strong when you can't. Plus you have such a considerate bf now, try to think for him (even as a friend). You wouldn't want to hurt him rite?

Usually a guy will find excuses to make the girl hate him enough to dump him. Guys never actually do any dumping. And if he does, I guess it means he doesn't want you anymore. Sorry for saying that, but I guess all you have to do now is calm yourself down, focus on what and who you have right now in your life and hope for a better future.

I had a bf for three years before who dumped me for another girl. I actually begged him not to leave me and he actually told me to stop contacting him because he was getting bored of my crying and begging. That was a really big slap on the face for me. I did contact him for a few weeks after that, hoping that he will take me back. He never did.

Thankfully, I have great and wonderful friends who helped me get thru the break up. So your friends are really important right now, as is your family. So just get thru this as best as you could, you will, and you know what, that guy who is staying with you now, might be worth more than your ex ever was

And time is always the best healer. Good luck

thanks for all ur support..yup..i am getting on my life..its hard..really..n to put everything from down n get to up..truely hard..he is dump me for other gal n i do see the gal even the gal break up with him just becoz she says i deserve for him..but still he just walk away..n when she knows,she say that i dont deserve to be with that kind of guy..she my best friend now..weird rite??..i carry on n as my bf i just tread him nice coz he deserve it even he knows how i feel but i dont want to hurt him..he makes me happy even i know deep in his heart he is hurt..but,he can't see my tears..he try everything to cheer me up..yup,he is too good..i do try everything..anythings that can make me forget bout him..when i with all my friend n my bf i feel calm,but when i all alone..tears come out again..yup..its does heal in long time..i do try hard act normal,be strong..its hurtfull..

Stop watching all those damn Taiwan/Korean soap .

Damn I hate romances it makes such painful memories, my books, my wives(computers), my pets do not make me feel that way.

omg.. my situation is like urs, except for the other girl bit. and even then, i'm not too sure.. i asked him, but he refused to answer.. and since he's in the US and I'm in the UK, I can't really spy on him. And frankly, I can't be bothered. In fact, if he ends up in those blind marriages (u know, the arranged marriage those muslim kids overseas have), I say best of luck to the unlucky girl who gets him...
omg. my ex is such a jerk!! that f*cking idiot. ok, cool down.. anyhow, like u, i've got great friends and family, too!! But the important thing I learnt from my teachers and people older than me is never marry someone who loves you less than you love him. especially if u're a muslim girl. cause the guy might end up divorcing u, or worse yet remarrying; thus making u the older wife. so, just look at all the jerks who left u as a lucky escape. cause otherwise, u prob had ended up in a worse condition after years of marriage...

haha.. i guess the guy is a plain jerk then.. i mean, both girls now best friends?? hahaha.. that is ironic, isn't it? somehow, i think crying when no one is around is normal.. just cry, don't let it stay in ur heart. and eventually u will grow tired of crying and will just not do it anymore (at least for me, the crying has become less frequent )

my heart goes to anyone who was dumped harshly by their bf!!! Anyhow, another good therapeutic method I found is watching loads of E entertainment channel. I find looking at the richest people in the world make me feel real happy.. maybe it's their extravagant lifestyle? or the fantastic handbags they have??

I could try that since it's completely hopeless for me.No point chasing anymore cause im ignored by her.

Gonna get addicted to Sins.It's the best medicine.

Yup Yup having nothing to do is the worst part, meditation is a good way to forget stuff too.

The best medicine for broken heart is time and definately not a new BF...
I dont really support your action no matter how pity you sounded...
Pick yourself up... you have been living 20+ years without him and after having him for 5 years and now that he's gone, I dont really see a big deal about it. There's always someone better thats waiting for you...

Same view here one bf to another does not sound right.

having a similar situation like u, babysweet. i just only broke up with my 5 yrs bf. i dunno how am i going to cope wit it. worse still, i m alone in the foreign country. came here to work bcoz of him. 1st day here, he broke up wit me. havent even settle in this country. i think my case is even worse than urs. at least, u got ur frens to support u..

then your bf rili sucks.

rili so cruel.

It hurts the most at break point and the after effect of losing the person.

You need to snap out of it and be strong.

The greatest enemy has always been ourselves in dragging us down to the bottom less pit because we self pity to the extend of no return.

Some ppl have friends to help them move on. Me? I have friends who helped me to move on. You need to surround yourself with more friends and trust me, you new BF is not going to help.

Which country are you in?

TS, let me hug, free hug.

Tell u my story...
my bf broke up with me 2 months plus ago after being together for 4 years plus. He is a very nice guy and i think maybe my temper made him sick at me but thats not the point. How i cope with it? It was very very difficult for me. I went for counselling and friends were there to support and comfort. I still think of him and miss him now but i need to tell myself that prepare for the worse. We still at separation time and will come with a conclusion by end of may but i prepare myself for the worse so that if we didnt get back together then i can move on. Yes, break up is very difficult especially when we are the one being dump by him. Time will heal..Just hang on there...

uh..nvr mind..i'll be ur friend..

nice to meet u..

---

Added on April 21, 2008, 1:11 amhmm... 3 mths of separation. Do u mean that in this 3 mth u n him never contact each other?

This post has been edited by sillygal08: Apr 21 2008, 01:11 AM

hmm... 3 mths of separation. Do u mean that in this 3 mth u n him never contact each other?

[/quote]
we got contact each other. the latet news is he told me that he can't give me an answer when i come back. He wants to date me like go movie and eat together to find his love back for me. Dont u think is silly? or he just playing me?

feels like he jz want ur accompany mean while to get other gals as his gf

really ah? i also feel like that. I always feel want to ignore his call when he calls but i still cant do that coz still love him....so depress lah...

u can do it if u believe u can

[quote=lohoh84,Apr 21 2008, 12:27 PM]
hmm... 3 mths of separation. Do u mean that in this 3 mth u n him never contact each other?

[/quote]
we got contact each other. the latet news is he told me that he can't give me an answer when i come back. He wants to date me like go movie and eat together to find his love back for me. Dont u think is silly? or he just playing me?

[/quote]

i also dont know. he also told me the same thing. he wants to start all over again. my case is different.. we dont contact each other for 1 mth. i also very confused. dunno whether this 1 mth is for me to prepare myself to let go this relationship. i m also very depressed.

putus ur r/s with ur new bf because u still think of old bf.
get a holiday, start afresh

not fair to new bf because:

a) u using him to forget old bf
b) after u forget old bf, there is a chance u wont need new bf, u will get into trouble (if u know what i mean)
c) ur emotion now not stable, cant judge properly
d) now is chance to analyze if there is anything wrong in ur way about a r/s

so, get a break first.

---

Added on April 22, 2008, 2:37 pmmau, ambik, takmau, lepas.

no need to be baby sitter.

i know not easy, but easy things in life are normally not valuable

This post has been edited by Petre: Apr 22 2008, 02:37 PM

yaya... i truly understand ur feeling... my ex together with me around 7yr jor.. also break up ending... that really very HURT.. but outsider dunno actually how weak than our heart to accept that face... i totally cant fully recover till now... is getting 3mth liao... v hv been experienced to much thing together in this 6yrs.. it's really GREAT MEMORY with him.... but..... the fact.... HE DUMP ME... and get marry after 1mth v break up... IT'S HIM WHAT I KNOW... how could i so stupid din realise another girl existing in his heart b4....

But... what i hv to do now just can WISHES them HAPPINESS.... nothing else i can do... LOVING HIM so hope he can get his own HAPPINESS ...

i'm not gonna say 'i understnd' coz i wont.

a better deserving person will come

err..
loving doesn't mean possessing sumone..
On the contrary, v should wish our loved one lots of hapiness.
True love is indeed hard to find..
time wil heal everything..
it takes time to delete a relationship from our memory..
but v wil b able to make it eventually..
i hav the same experience as u b4..
but now i know who is the one i love most..he is my present bf..
our relationship is stable..v both was hurted by our ex b4..
n thus v appreciate our relationship ^^

erm... i guess the hardest part about breaking up is not forgetting but moving on rite?
don't try to forget abt ur ex, u sld move on wid the sweet memory ...
it's tough i noe, bt u cn do it if u tried hard enuf.
tat's what i am now. cherish watever u have and b contented.
if u confirm u dun love ur current bf, then better cut it quick. dun hurt him.

buang jus oren, baru bule masuk jus tembikai. kalau campur, maka tak sedap ler

erm... dun understand.... meaning?

new thing..i been alone now..i think not fair to be with my bf..i think its time give some space to each other n some time for myself.. bad day bad life..mm..

means, put ur heart into your new relationship, no need to keep space in the heart for old one.

my gf used me during the holidays and dump me after wards...

the next holiday i went exploring the world and never regret every since ^^

I might be young, let's go out to visit some pet shop and meow meow around. I think pet is a best way to release stress... Or we can go FTZ for dota haha..

Well, if you are animal lover, i really would suggest you get some pet to accompany you, they make a good companion... especially.. my taby.. meow...... man i miss him.. zzz... nah let u see him, but no buat harta...

http://bp2.blogger.com/__rBn89Q6XPk/R9ETU7...-h/Image263.jpg

ahh paste the link urself into the web, something wrong with my browser, goddamn it..

Anyway, LYN here is a big community, you can always meet us, or you can move on around to look for us, and i think *some* will find you too



This post has been edited by a13solut3: Apr 25 2008, 07:46 AM

yeah, u'r neve alone!

hi..hehe..i do have cats..my lovely baby ..he been with me for 6 years now..this his pic..


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