i dont care about what and how my friends think - as long as we are happy

and mum - are you ok if i bring back a 40 yo lau-ee with 2 teenage kids in tow to this coming reunion dinner ??

Ask yourself the following:

1. Attracted to that age group because of how they look physically and attitude? Young, fresh, carefree attitude?
2. Most 20s or 30s girl/women typically would not look at life they way you do in your 40s. If there isn't compatibility, it then comes back to no 1 which is physical.
3. Assuming you are doing well in your career or business, are these age group girls giving attention to your advances because you provide stability/money? Or are you truly that charming that they are drawn to older man like yourself?

So, the way I see it, either the girl themselves are acting way too mature for their age, or you're acting too young for your age. The rest charm, personality and money.

So, looking for trophy girls to show off as girlfriend? Hey, we get it. Who isn't drawn to young beauty. But for them to go out with you who is much older, it's either because of money or you're helluva charming with good looks, or all combined. Otherwise, they typically won't accept someone much older. Trust me, they also want to look good amongst their friends. Her girl friends would also ask her the same thing in reverse, "What does she see in you to wanna date someone much older?" Her answer would be charming, he provides for me, he's good looking, he's rich. It's not often they would say, "we share all the same interest and our stars somehow aligns". Possible but highly rare.

Which falls back to, do they see you as a daddy figure bcoz you can provide good emotional support? So, truly ask yourself, what are you looking for. Someone young, innocent, someone you can control, someone who don't look down on you, someone who sees you as matured? Do you really think there are many in that age group will have the same interest and train of thoughts like a 40+ year old man? Some, but they are rare and few. Especially girls who are sociable with their own circle of friends of the same age group. The loner type, the shy type, these girls will like it if you give them attention.

Personally, I'd want a strong character if I was 40+ and moving up the corporate ladder or running my own business. I don't need emotional baggage at this point in my life, where my career is going well. This is partly because I'm very strong headed and need someone to match my aura, and not the other way around.

On surface, you'd look good to others. You gain confidence coz you have a much younger GF. And if you really can find someone who carries themselves truly well, someone who is at the top of their game, very focus, good on you. Otherwise, you're either stepping down to their level, or they rise up to your level. There is no in-between.

Now, if you're just one of the average joes out there, working a 9-5 job with not much of an ambition but just take 1 salary at a time, 1 year at a time, then that could be a possibility why looking for someone younger makes sense coz 40+ women who are established or doing well don't think you would be a good fit for them. Hence it's harder, because these group may want commitment fast due to their age.

Anyway, I'm just sharing my thoughts on mindset between 2 different age groups. Of course, if they're all just for fun, by all means. Who cares what others think. As long as you're having good time and not hurting anyone. F your peers    (note: the fact that you worry what your peers thinks about you is because you understand why they think the way they do, otherwise you wouldn't give a shit)

TS

There is in a big difference between early 20s and early 30s women. The target market you are looking at.

Early 20s women tend to want to have more fun. If they are dating a 40s guy, its to fund their fun lifestyle because their income is very low. In other words, they want a sugardaddy if dating a 40s guy.

Early 30s women tend to be more ready to settle down. They already had their fun life. Their income now is better than 5 to 10 years before, so they are more financially independent. If they date a 40 yo guy, its less likely expecting a sugardaddy but still will.like a provider guy.
Now there are still early 30s girls who looks a sugardaddy but these probably go to a 50s or even older guy.

I think for a 40 yo like TS, the sweet spot is late 20s.