OK story is simple:

A is a colleague from another department but I know him well.
He told me of a story he only dares to tell me now after nearly 3.5 years it happened.

A is a 40+ year old male (3.5 years back was late 30s).
New junior joined his department under his supervision, let's call her B and she was early 20s when she joined.
When B joined in, B immediately clicked with A and they talked / chatted a lot whether on IG or Whatsapp.
At first A was supposed to evaluate B's performance in her first 3 years so he thought B was just trying to get in good shoes so she chatted with him.
B has a bf but she illustrated to A as "not a confirmed relationship" even though it has been going on for nearly 2 years (at the beginning).

But somehow B can tell anything to A without any judgement or prejudice. Like her own stuffs, her family stuffs, even her relationship, her goals, her dreams etc.

After they chatted continuously for nearly 2.5 years, suddenly she broke off with the bf saying she had to do it.

At that point A tried to ask her out and all that but to no avail. She said she feels comfortable with the way they both are and doesn't see a need to elevate this "relationship".
That was also when she just got out of a major depression where she needed to take sleeping pills to sleep.
But somehow after rejection, she still keeps finding A even when A has now already changed department to my department.

I wonder sometimes, why women do this. I know she not interested but why she keeps finding A still when she already rejected him?

A lot of women do this, obviously. The reason they do it is because they can get something out of you, either a good performance rating or free helps and advices. In your case, the junior also knows very well that you're not really a potential boyfriend material for her, probably because ahe didn't find you attractive enough or too old. Women in their 20s usually aren’t going to date someone in their 40s, unless you're really well-off (being a senior is not usually enough). My advice: cut ties with her unless you're okay with being used by her. Either way, you both get something out of each other.

Coz they know simps are easy to be manipulated to their advantage, and obviously wimmens likes attention.

what do you mean by elevating that relationship? Sex already happen or not within 2.5 years. I could see A don't want to sabotage his own position that's why he tries to not go too hard on his intent

backup guys, tampon guys, friendzone guys. She suddenly thought I have options.

A late 30s guy shouldn't be confused with a female motivation unless if he was very inexperienced with dating

Cool story. Wimminz like gold. No gold to dig you godie

Men de-stress by doing something / nothing alone just to clear off the mind

Women de-stress by talking it out. She just need a emotional bin......

A should refocus on something else whether go for class / gym / seminar. Make it well know so next time when B looking for emotional bin, can make use these excuses....

Sometimes when too free then can go ahead to listen women story telling..... Basically fickle minded problem.

Some is drama women. Look interesting when u r spectators but imagine u r part of the drama... No fun, stay away for ur own good

This post has been edited by abelyap: Jul 21 2025, 03:01 AM

women like to talk and to express their emotion. Period.

so women can form friendships with any guys without falling in love with them. So, simps are very suitable for them to lend a ear to them.

Similarly, men can sleep with any women without falling in love with any of them

Female colleague dont like you, everything will become workplace harassment.

For me, A n B like each other.

If not, why spend extra time on each other please!?

No life planning!? No dream!?

Stop bullshit.

Women have an uncanny knack for locating simps and doormats which they can then use to their advantage.

Your colleague is one of them.

she is using him as emotion outlet, this should be his boyfriend job, ghost her and dont talk with her anymore

hmmmm... why does this story sound so familiar? does it happen in one of the companies in bayan lepas? hahahahaha

Nope, this is in KL.