i think so too. u know the phrase a tiger never looses its stripe or a cheetah never looses it's spots?

a liar will always lie and a cheater will always cheat. i found out from my mother in law after my wife left me that before she got engaged to me, she was engaged to another guy, she left that guy for me.... man that hurt me to the core. it's like, if i knew this earlier, we wouldnt have gotten married

Whilst I got divorce when I'm hitting my prime. So i tell myself this is her loss, not mine. And the same been knowing my ex wife for a decade too, but she or maybe us can just changed just as when she will.

Like how my previous started - If our marriage has kids, things MAY be different, maybe only but it's all over and moved on now.

Been struggling with the new girl in my post, and yet another disappointment. This is all my love mid life challenge crisis. Reciprocating now and building myself back by next year to welcome the right one for me.

This post has been edited by pkn_jet: Aug 24 2025, 11:06 PM

In my opinion u quite rush lol

But.. right person will be coming at the right time.
No need too much effort to do many things

But have u ever wonder anything u would improve yourselves for the next relationships? I always think that one hand doesnt clap.

I think u need some time to properly heal yourself. give yourself some love and what not before going after another. my wife and i have a child together. he's 10 now, it breaks my heart because amongst 3 of us, he is the one left with the most scar and hurt. i took a decisive decision where i wanted the child to have shared custody because i believe the child requires love from both parents. so in other words, i cant really completely cut my ex off my life, it hurt a little while because everytime i see her, i am filled with anger and dissapointment. but now i feel much better, because i took time to actually heal myself and see myself from a different light

well to be fair, her complain was that i was rarely around with the family due to my heavy business trip schedules. i travel quite a lot back in the day but i have told her before we got married, i will climb as high as i can on the corporate ladder and will only settle down after i am 40. well i settled down on at 42 because i was last employed by huawei. everyone would know, this company will drain u to the core and send u everywhere in the world. before i took that job, i discussed with her and she told me to accept it since i was retrenched by another company, so i did.

after a year of service, i returned home and joined a local company, took a huge paycut but only to find out she already had someone else. i gave her 9 months to turn around, imagine what's it like, sharing a bed with someone whom u know is already having someone else by the side. it's utter torture. but i told myself for our kid, i have to try. only after 9 months i realized it's not working as her heart is no longer here, so i had to let her go.

No suprise.

How many times have been stressed in this forum..

NO CONFESSION to the girl.

And in this case u confessed 2 times LOL.

With perdictable results.

If u feel u need to confess, its a clear sign that she is not attracted to you.

Yea.. at least i got the closure i need, rather than keep guessing and waiting. I've learnt that a relationship is mutual, if a girl is interested with you, it will be.

I'm actually feeling more relieved after this closure, meaning the "pursue and hope" finally came to an end, and back to market again when I'm ready.

This post has been edited by pkn_jet: Aug 25 2025, 07:17 PM

I can understand that feeling, the process, up and downs. Alot of confusion, hope, disappointment and torture. How long is ur divorcee past already?

My friend is working in huawei UK. Super PUA. I know CCP company.

This post has been edited by NinG: Aug 25 2025, 08:46 PM

It’s been 25 months now. Just over 2 years

So did u met anyone after the divorcee? How children do u have? Its quite impossible to cut off ex waifu from kids unless the waifu is problematic. Its a not easy decision.

I’ve been on a couple of dates starting this year. I have to say it’s so weird. I cannot understand the dating scene these days.

Last i went on a date was like 13 years ago? So lol it’s so scary now.

Not easy for me to find someone new to date solely coz i focus on work and my son. And by nature i dont really like to go out from my house lol

How about u? What’s ur story?

Your age is 40+ right now. Then what age you date? Apa funny setori can share????

When i say like that u roughly can guess my story liao. But few people know me here. I dont wanna share too much. But my last date was 15 years ago lol..

Find someone who wants a family but not a home.

err let's see, i had one date who was 29. she talks about dunno wat vibing la, and their mentality is about social media la, inspired to be an influencer when i see her, i am not influenced at all lol.

another one was 38 if not mistaken. she a bit normal, but she is the type where she wont text u unless u text her. to me, it's like 1 way street. i believe in equal contribution or effort in making something work. dunno maybe it's me who has wrong mentality.

why u so secretive? lol u someone femes ar?

Ooooo.. so funny those people u met. But you just trying with them or sudahpun ur gf. Maybe ur ideal partner would be someone who would love to take care of you and your son. Love to bond as a family.

Im not secretive. Cuma those asshole later doxx me sia. Sudah pun they know me but I never tell my setori in details.

My previous relationships was being manipulated and just woke up since last year Dec.

no no no, not gf. just 1 date with the 29ner and 3-4 times with the 38? hardly can consider gf....
i am kinda looking for a partner for companionship, drama free, no headaches, no lies, just blunt honesty even though it hurts lol. yes and someone who can get a long with my son is a priority.

u know anyone ka? hahaha

Ok bro..dont be a noob.

Pursuing a girl is about making a girl attracted to u. It is a process. From changing her view of you from neutral, to curious, and then to attracted. Ideally, should be done in 1 date, maybe 2 or 3 but not much longer. Life is too short and your time is too valuable.

Got it bro..

But my case was a lil different if you can recall how me and her actually knowing each other before - where I'm still married, then divorced, then back to single, then getting close with her, and then ended. She is not like someone i met for a short while, then decided to pursue and go-after-her after kinda straight forward situation.

Btw just to share with you - I got to know from our close peer that she actually told her that we have been hanging out (though i tot all of our meet up were made discreet), didnt managed to korek more from the peer but she did mentioned to her that "she has some concern" about us (likely either my divorce is still quite fresh, or i'm a divorcee). Yet, the peer did not ask me to move on from her (assuming if she's not interested with me, she will just tell her that i have no chance).

Whatever it is, there's already a closure, accepting that she is not interested in me but value our friendship more than a romantic relationship.

Anyway, I really appreciate all of your comment and i take this as a life lesson, and to be a better self for my next one.

This post has been edited by pkn_jet: Aug 26 2025, 02:39 PM

I dont know anyone.. hahaha 😆 kesusahan o ni.

Oh.. I tot u got 2 gfs after divorcee.. true, no drama just peace of life. Just get along comfortably.

lol 2 gf. should i be so lucky....i'm old and fat liao

R u >45yo or below?

Then u should eksersai.. lol.. how many gf also ok one.. janji u hepi