If a couple is living in Japan or plan to do so, then I think they must be able to speak at very least to the level where it's comfortable enough to take care of one's living independently without relying on any other language or machine translators. More so if their spouse's family can't speaking their language, and even more so when they're having kids.

But in my case, while all of the above applies, it's a struggle so far, so much so that it's one of my biggest concern, despite we both share the view above even before marriage. In fact, she hates this situation more than I do because of her first-hand experience as a typical second-gen immigrant who's being put in the situation where she perpetually needs to supported her own parent and all the mess it creates further down, on paper works of all kinds and medical situation, etc etc. It sounds very messy and concerening to say at least. However, I add more anxiety, pressure and discouragement onto her learning journy, so that is NOT helping her. I pick up on every mistake she makes, and also there'a a fact that I have experienced acquiring English, so I naturally get frustrated when she's not trying as hard as I did in exactly the same way I did despite the situational differences, and acknowledgement that each people learns language differenlty. (My fluent foreign freinds tells me I'm too harsh.) I also hate and do not believe in negative enforcement on any learning activity. Welp, it isn't the life-death situation so I'm trying to change perspective on that though.

TBH I'm more concerned rn about me being unable to converse with her parents without her as a translator. Maybe I should concentrate on what I can controll and just have a faith in my wife, you know. She's a great teacher for me so that also helps.

Edit: part in capital letters, and elaboration

I'm already learning japanese for work, if I get japanese moi moi my only concern is if parents can accept or not, because of history some parents even though family tree aren't part of what happen in ww2 will still be kinda against a jap waifu simply because of history.

Its also very easy to detect, just look at sushi restaurant, you rarely see the ww2 gen lepak those place or like sushi. But the 80's and 90's gen LOVE japanese culture and food.

world war 2 :X

The 65 - 70++ group la ..... they are the generation that is still pantang against jap for the invasion. Its also the first gen that was advice by their elders to stay away from picking japanese girls as waifu.