“Duan Wu Jie” (端午节) is arriving at the end of this month. When Duan Wu Jie arrives, the rice dumpling will be the food that will cultural delicacy that will bring back the old memories of the past. In the past, I recalled I used to help my grandparent & parent to wrap the rice dumpling together with my siblings and cousins of a similar age. Taking care of the fire of the open stove using the rubber woods will be standard chores assigned to the kids. The wait for the rice dumpling to be cooked was a hell of a wait. Usually 4~6 hours with the constant water topping up. It was a tedious task, but we had ample time to play with the siblings and cousins (maybe our time during that time was not so valuable , maybe).

With the wave of modernization, soon the open stove with the traditional firewood was replaced with the pressurized gas stove with a pressure cooker. The wait for the cooking has been reduced drastically from 6 hours to only 2 hours. How convenient our modern life has become. 6 hours reduces to 2 hours due to technology advancement, but do we gain from the 4 hours of time saved? Something to ponder.

2 days ago, I went back for a surprise visit for my mom, since she said she would be preparing the rice dumpling. She called me earlier asking if I'll be back the coming weekend—I was thinking, "We just celebrated the Mother's Day celebration last week; are we still going back this week ?" Actually, the honest answer within me was I'm uncertain; hence, I told her I couldn't make it. My mom knew well, but she just wanted to ask even though she knew the answer. Sometimes you know our parents, they know certain answers, they know certain things have been repeated, yet they will still repeat or ask again.

In the past, I may get agitated & stressed out, and I'll say to my mom, "Mom, you just said that—the same topic , the same repeated wet market story, the same repeated weather story, the same repeated wubo-wubo (无补无补, aka “no point” small talk) stories, etc." I'll ignore my mom in the past and get angry that she is wasting my time—I have so much to think about in my head; where the hell do I get time for such "wubo-wubo" stuff?

Until recently, I think I had been very wrong for such treatment of my old people. I'm so, so wrong. Our parents' perception is limited, and it is not their fault. The wubo-wubo (in Hokkien) is their way to get close to their children. That is their world; that's their way to initiate conversation with their children—that's the only topic they are familiar with. How can I expect them to talk to me on science and technology matters that they have no knowledge of at all?! I just need to reflect and lower my lens to reach their world—to let them in. They just wanted to reconnect with their children. After that sudden realization, I no longer brush them off on the wubo-wubo topic.



I notice a lot of my peers' parents are leaving to another world, us one by one. Once their parent was no longer alive, they posted their regret on social media and grieved. For what doing a thing? I asked. Why not treat them well when they're alive? Yet, I'll need to thank them for the lesson they gave from their life to awaken me, that my parents' time is running out & I need to treasure them while I still can. To spare some wubo-wubo time with my parents is not something luxurious or out of my reach; it is within my reach—I only need my willingness. Hence, I decided to change the way to deal with such wubo-wubo interaction ever since.

I told my mom earlier I couldn't make it, but I decided to take a detour from my trip town just to give her a surprise visit in 2 days. I reached my parents' house in the evening in the hope that I would not be late to join the wrapping session. Mana tau, my neighbor came and helped my mom wrap, and they got everything completed in the morning. By the time I arrived, the rice dumpling was already cooked & ready. I feel I missed out on the bonding experience offered by the cultural event—an opportunity that fosters a proprietary sense of culture, as emphasized in my ancestors’ Confucian teachings.

Even though I was late to join the dumpling-wrapping session, the facial expression given by my mother hinted I'm not late to show that I care about her wubo-wubo request on whether I'll be coming back.

To anyone reading this:
Have you had these "wubo-wubo" moments with your parents? How do you handle them? Do you brush them off—or have you learned to listen a little more?

dunno why, always have gamey smell on pork. while the red bean one, taste like got chemical.

think this boils down to how those changs are prepared...

halal one, one dun say la, the chikin taste like ginger only. better gip dog.

Thanks for the video links. Treasure this culture, if you don't see the erosion of culture coming our way. This culture is slowly being replaced with "outsource culture" ?

What is "outsource culture"?

Don't make own rice dumpling - outsource = buy outside only = use money to buy.

This one I think I can confidently state, you bought the rice dumplings outside, it is not home made.

If bought outside, you need to worry about the preservative.

I like the small golden color with black sweet sugar sauce. Hnnghhh

Stop eating cheap stuff.

TDF cheap stuff? okay.