So TS saw fish
Fish look tasty
One day canteen accidentally serve TS fish
TS ate fish once
Sedap
TS went back canteen want to eat more fish
Canteen say sorry no fish for you

And since then TS trauma and don’t date to eat fish anymore. Memories of the canteen say no hurt TS badly.

Ok… TS, can we agree
1. There’s more fish in the sea
2. That’s not the only place serve fish… mcd got, Gerai got, Michelin restaurant got…

But because of that bad memory hurt TS he swore off fish, but actually deep down he like fish. So tamau fish because the process to get it is painful, cause may kena reject.

Ok.. did I understand YOUR FEELINGS correctly?

Ramjade is telling you to just keep asking until you numb. And if you ask 300 girls 1 will say yes because statistics. That’s the correct playbook but doesn’t address how you feel about it.

Let’s explore it further
Why you feel like vomiting/sick/nausea when girls reject you?

Why is it such a big deal when someone says no to you? Are you secretly royalty related to Kim Jong Un and growing up nobody said no to you cause if they do their families get shot and their heads get chopped off? Need more context as to why you feel so strongly.

OR the other option just buy a mail order bride from Laos or Cambodia. As long as you pay her family money she won’t reject you. Make sure you got money lah.

Thanks for the reply bro. Yeah maybe I'm a bit sensitive around girls. Cause I'm the kinda of guy who apologies a lot if I make a mistake even in work place. So girls also the same . I always apologize even when I'm not wrong. Maybe you a right u should talk to girls more.

When people say no to me I get the rejection feelings kinda like you go interviews and get rejected from your job application. Kinda like that with girls if a girl rejects me i feel very bitter and sour. If.girl like me it's a boost in my confidence and ego. But mostly now I got rejected I feel like I will get rejected 100% all the time.Thats why I gave up. But u know I like statically speaking if 300 people 1 girls bound to say yes. Maybe in the future when I'm stable again I'll ask a girl out with me to cinema again. Thanks for the statistics analysis.

I know there a lot girls also who can be bought with money. Some girls needs a financially stable guy or a rich guy to help with financial burden. But I feel that's not love bro. Because I seen guys dating Thailand girls and Vietnam girls but they seemed to be involved with a lot of money. That's more like financial love. I kinda want who like me for who I am and not because of the money. Kinda want a true romantic partner instead of constantly thinking a bout money kinda of girl. I understand the world has become very materialistic but Im an old thinking person. I don't like money to revolve around love concept. Everyone can make money but true feelings and love is ancient bro even in this materialistic world(modern world). I'm more ancient lover then a modern lover bro

I will tell you what I did. I laid out all my cons to the girl, tell them what I want. Lots rejected me cause I told them I got no life, cannot bring them on overseas holiday. One stayed.

You can do what I do. You know the one who stayed is true cause she stayed even though know no life, cannot go overseas holiday.

But you still continue to go for job interviews and get a job? Then how is it different with girls bro? Why you are especially sensitive because it's a girl rejecting you?

You need to understand that in life, 99% of the time you do not get what you want, with the exception of royalty that's the 1%. Being rejected is the norm, not the exception. Talk to sales people, in insurance, standing in malls asking you to sign up credit card, property agents, etc. they get rejected all the time.

YOU, need to understand and internalize to yourself that it is absolutely NORMAL to get rejected. And moving forward you will be rejected. You suggest having McD for lunch and your friends reject you, they want KFC. It is not that big a deal. More often than not, they reject you have nothing to do with you.

The girl reject you, because she already set in stone she wants the other guy. Does that mean you are lesser? Inferior? No lah, she just wants the other guy. I want McD ayam goreng today, but tomorrow I want KFC. Does that mean 1 is inferior to the other? Nolah, they are just different. Some days I prefer the kick of McD spicy with that thick batter, some days I don't. So should McD spicy ayam feel nausea and vomiting cause the chicken died for me and I don't want to eat it? Takkan right.

That's the lucky one. Little that they know Ramjade is sitting on a mine of exponential growth hidden from plain sight. hahahaha. Exactly, you want the girl who likes you for who you are, not what you have.

Have power & influence? You will lose it over time, look at Mamakthir. Have fancy CEO title? Can't work forever, will soon be forgotten. Young 20 year old F1 fans won't know who is Jim Todt except he's Michelle Yeoh's husband.

Main order bride? She can be with you for 10 years but once the money dries out she will be on the next flight back to where she came from.

Thanks. But not official yet. Already ask. Wait for her reply. Let's see how. She did told me she is not going anywhere.

I understand you bro. Rejection is to accept. I completely understand it may still apply I love as well. But love really hurts.Especially those memories. If job rejection I can handle pretty well. But love rejection really hurts. It also hurts my image and who I am. After love rejection I stopped looking at my image a lot thinking I'm not handsome enough.Maybe it's the girls not so much about. But I understand your idea of rejection. Time to create new memories then

No one can help you if you don't help yourself. You can continue shut yourself down be alone your whole life or numb yourself and see if you things change. I just to get rejected multiple times so that rejection now does nothing for me. I am just next.

am in no position to advice anything.....
plus....all the good advice is all laid out right above

just wanna know...
what movie was it?

dowan to talk bout it, totally understand

but you better understand this one other thing too
yes, she's left this one huge impact on your life
you feel she's the best thing that's ever happened in your life
we've all gone through this
normally we'll snap out of the first when we hop on to the next

fret not young man
the right partner will swing by
when you least expect it

It's all English Movies.
1st movie was an Action Romance films. Hey i thoughts romantic films work. But she was to busy with her phone. Most of the time she was with her phone chatting with someone which i don't know who(maybe her ex boyfriend?)

2nd movie was an Animated film i like animated films thought she might like it. But she invited her cousin along whom is also a girl which i didnt mind.

3rd film was also an English film i thought she might. i asked her if she wanted popcorn but she was too busy with her phone again.


other was outing at Starbucks Cafe and Morning walking around the polo ground. I thought girls like active guys. But she seemed uninterested in my skipping rope skills. I can skip rope pretty well.
Starbucks cafe she invited her cousin again i felt i couldnt express my feelings because her cousin was there. I thought her cousin may vomit if i discuss my feelings.
Akward at Starbuck i kept a poker face as i order Coffee.

Last outing was morning breakfast where we ate Wan ton mee at an old coffee shop which i know the Stall owners since childhood. She shared some travelling trip s of her where she went to europe and usa, I forgot to mention she is a very rich girl. Had a Hyundai Veloster. I waas driving a Honda Crz. My mother keeps telling me girls like me because of my Car. is it true she only came to me because i had a nice car?FOR ME I DONT like girls who chase me because of my wealth and nice things. I thought it was a sincere feeling.

If the girl is always on the phone or invite someone to come with the meeting, she is not interested in you.

I laughed hard here. Skip rope? What are you? A loser?

Courtship, simplified, is just doing sales.

1. To get the girl (buyer) to like you, YOU (salesman) must FIRST KNOW what the buyer wants.

1A. Why the fish you trying to impress her or make her like you when YOU DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT SHE LIKE? You clown? Trying to entertain everybody? Cause that’s what clowns do, they come up with material to appeal to Semua lapisan masyrakat.

2. She doesn’t give a shit about you or your car la. Only you you think you are cool with your Honda. If she thinks your car is damn cool you don’t want her anyway. Or the next cooler car show up you’re history.

You think highly of yourself when in fact you’re nobody. You’re just another unique human being; fact: there’s 2 billion unique human beings out there how unique do you think you are? Unless your family got networth upwards of RM100 million, you’re seriously habuk, so take your head out of your ass.

3. When trying to get a girl, watching movie is the dumbest thing to do because you are not interacting with her. See 1A. You’re supposed to talk to her, ask her what she look for in relationship, what’s her biggest fear, what’s her dreams, what she thinks about starting a family, what she wants to achieve, which countries she wanna go and why, what is on her “to do” list before she dies. All these questions help you know more about her. Shit, how much do you know about her? Do you know what’s her favorite food? What’s her favorite color and why?

Or you just like her cause she’s pretty and that’s all just on surface level?

I think your first problem is not that you cannot get girls. You’re immature and shallow. Grow up buddy.

Well that's your thoughts.. Everyone has their opinions I respect. But some girls like guys who bring them to cinema.. it's not about million net worth bro. Like my dad had only rm100 when he married my mom. After he climbed the ladder. I always take my dads advice. Simple is the best. That how my dad met my mom. A cool car is only an addition. As I told you I'm an ancient lover not a modern lover. So you may understand my age group. May older women may think that way don't know youngsters and don't care about their opinions. You must understand certain things about the modern world and the ancient one. Modern is all materialistic. There is even a song about it. Ancient lover is everlasting. I hope you can understand bro. I don't know how old you are but my age group is all ancient lovers bro.Even they know what hardworking money is with old lovers

Sorry. I have agreed with Jason. Go watch YouTube on places to bring girl for date. Bringing her to cinema is a wrong move because you guys are not talking. You need to talk to the girl to know what she wants and see if you have what she wants. Cinema is usually reserved for 3rd or 4th meeting onwards. Heck I never bring girls to cinema. I always being them to park or just some where to makan and chit chat. By first meeting usually you have rough idea do you want to see the girl again or not. Same goes with girl. Some people like to do it slow talking about 2-3 meeting only find out what she wants. Some people do it fast. I belong to the fast camp. Find out if she have what I want and do I have what she want. By first meeting, I roughly know those things.

It's not about modern love and ancient love. Trust me, my filter filter out 90% of the girls. Why? I set my first criteria to be frugal. I look at what phones and bags they wear. It's about seeing if the girl have what you want and seeing if you have what girl wants.

Talking alone is not enough. You need to know the girl love language and talk to her using her love language. If you talk using a different love language, she won't feel love. The olden days are over. Kindly adept and move with time. You still can find olden love in traditional times.

That is what later part. Right now you need to figure a way to pull yourself out. No one can help yourself u less you decide to help yourself.

This post has been edited by Ramjade: Mar 22 2025, 01:37 PM

You know why people go to cinema as first date last time?

Its for "accidental" physical contact (hand touch when eating popcorn) or even more hanky panky stuff. Nowadays with all the surveillance, people don't go there for initial dates anymore.

Convince yourself about your "ancient love" all you like, but know that it is a delusion. Its only something you tell yourself to make yourself feel better.

There are 2 things you need to do
1) Learn more about yourself so you become more confident in your own skin
2) Learn more about women and how to court them

Going extreme in either (1) or (2) is bad, but you do need to know how to do both and find your balance point. People like ramjade is very clear about who he is and also very clear about what he wants in a partner. However he's not so stupid to not put effort into some courtship and romance.

So maybe cinema wasn't a good idea. Maybe my mistake. If you were me what place would you bring a girl at?. Starbucks Cafe? What would be an ideal place for a date?
Maybe next time I could ask a girl out to that place.Thanks

I'm not you, you are not me.

If you try to follow what I suggest, you'll fail. Just like if I follow ramjade's style, I'll also fail. I'm not so frugal like him

Figure yourself out first, the girls can come after that.

Bro. Gets over it. This incident happened 10+ years ago. Like many said, lots of fish in the sea, just because the fish you like ran away doesn't mean you are a loser for life.

And again, the thing happened between you and the girl you can considered it a normal friend outing. Don't let the outing (or you called it as DATE) to ruin your life any more. It is ok to feel down for a short time, but 10+ years and still stuck in this is way too long...

Why you cannot learn? You dense or what?

In my post above I said, find out what THE GIRL likes. Why you care if Ramjade brings his girls to kopitiam and I bring girl go high tea at Ritz Carlton?

You are not me or Ramjade. Why don’t you just ask the girl what she likes, does she like cafe hopping, or prefer quieter new places, or she dislike all these fancy place and like manak.

Sigh. I do encourage you to seek help, but there’s no point if you don’t implement and don’t learn.

I am cheap guy. I either bring the girl to a public park or go sushi (free green tea refill). If you talk for a long time, you will get thirsty.