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 When should i tell her?, UPDATE

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TSTearsFromMe
post Jan 10 2025, 08:49 PM, updated 2d ago

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Hi there, know her for 2 months, everything going well with outings, at first i just wanna treat her as friend but the times goes on and now many hints that she like me, of course i like her too...

BUT she doesnt know my heart condition yet. (My heart condition might need an open heart surgery in short future)

So when is the right time to tell her my condition? Or end just this friendship? Any other good advise??



UPDATE: I havent tell her yet but I decided to tell her everything before moving into relationship... I will respect her any decision. Dont worry guys, i last time did tell the other girl my condition before but at last she didnt choose me, i dont blame her, but sad haha... AND also i do plan not to have baby... My family dont have history of heart disease, i am the unlucky one...

Thank you all for the advise.

This post has been edited by TearsFromMe: Jan 13 2025, 08:49 PM
zero5177
post Jan 10 2025, 09:11 PM

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U need to let her know, don't hide from her.

If she distance away from you because you told her about it, then it won't make much difference if she know about it later, worse finding out you hiding from her.
Jason
post Jan 11 2025, 02:41 AM

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Just tell her now. If later she tell you she like you, and you tell her your condition, she run away you feel hurt.

Unnecessary. Just address it now before things go further. And if she runs away now, even better, she won’t stick around you thru thick and thin so good riddance you can save your feelings for someone who does.

Oh and all the best. Remember your will to live is half the battle. Stay strong.
giftfre
post Jan 11 2025, 06:47 AM

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Be frank to her if you want her to be your partner. She will leave you if she can't accept all the risk with you. Cheers
w19
post Jan 11 2025, 11:29 PM

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QUOTE(TearsFromMe @ Jan 10 2025, 08:49 PM)
Hi there, know her for 2 months, everything going well with outings, at first i just wanna treat her as friend but the times goes on and now many hints that she like me, of course i like her too...

BUT she doesnt know my heart condition yet. (My heart condition might need an open heart surgery in short future)

So when is the right time to tell her my condition? Or end just this friendship? Any other good advise??
*
Bro, Im very sorry I will say "BIG NO"! Please forgive me.

Be Responsibility!

My experience! My parent without any health problem.

1. Older sister first husband (Thalassemia Carrier) Increase risk of blood cancer. Open secret most of blood cancer patient are thalassemia carrier. If you are carrier, most of advance country will not accept you for migration. Its a dangerous genetic disease!

-Never do any per-married check. She didnt know it after baby out (1 Baby). A lot of problem. Time Bomb. Now divorce already.

2. Second sister (Hep B)

-Sis know it but husband say its nothing. She didnt know how she get it. All family member dont have. She almost die when she was early 20 as bacteria active. 3 Baby, all carrier. Time Bomb.

3. Bro in law (Thalassemia Carrier) (Wife side) (Family all keep mouth shut)

-Never do any per-married check. Mother pass away when he just a baby. Now, with only daughter (Thalassemia Carrier). A lot of problem. Time Bomb. The husband is excellent person. Once he know it, he stop all the family plan. This is right character we need in this world.

As a responsibility person, please make a full check up on all genetic disease.

Hep A, B, C, Thalassemia, Aids, STD n more.

I hope anyone with dangerous genetic disease carrier please stop produce baby. Be responsible person. This is only way to stop all this!

Im serious. This is not joke. Dont believe, please ask doctor you know about tsunami of thalassemia in Malaysia!

Maybe you can say money can overcome any disease but not Thalassemia! Once active, you got 2 choice. Both also send you half way to hell. First, huge medical fee. Maybe safe you but your soul n money half gone. Second, money n soul all gone. Did you think about your next of kin please!?

Last, I know a lot of guy with big, long n powerful gun n girl with Murchison Waterfall. You all like to enjoy, play n show but "PLEASE BE RESPONSIBLE"!

This post has been edited by w19: Jan 12 2025, 02:55 PM
Blofeld
post Jan 13 2025, 12:54 AM

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QUOTE(w19 @ Jan 11 2025, 11:29 PM)
Bro, Im very sorry I will say "BIG NO"! Please forgive me.

Be Responsibility!

My experience! My parent without any health problem.

1. Older sister first husband (Thalassemia Carrier) Increase risk of blood cancer. Open secret most of blood cancer patient are thalassemia carrier. If you are carrier, most of advance country will not accept you for migration. Its a dangerous genetic disease!

-Never do any per-married check. She didnt know it after baby out (1 Baby). A lot of problem. Time Bomb. Now divorce already.

2. Second sister (Hep B)

-Sis know it but husband say its nothing. She didnt know how she get it. All family member dont have. She almost die when she was early 20 as bacteria active. 3 Baby, all carrier. Time Bomb.

3. Bro in law (Thalassemia Carrier) (Wife side) (Family all keep mouth shut)

-Never do any per-married check. Mother pass away when he just a baby. Now, with only daughter (Thalassemia Carrier). A lot of problem. Time Bomb. The husband is excellent person. Once he know it, he stop all the family plan. This is right character we need in this world.

As a responsibility person, please make a full check up on all genetic disease.

Hep A, B, C, Thalassemia, Aids, STD n more.

I hope anyone with dangerous genetic disease carrier please stop produce baby. Be responsible person. This is only way to stop all this!

Im serious. This is not joke. Dont believe, please ask doctor you know about tsunami of thalassemia in Malaysia!

Maybe you can say money can overcome any disease but not Thalassemia! Once active, you got 2 choice. Both also send you half way to hell. First, huge medical fee. Maybe safe you but your soul n money half gone. Second, money n soul all gone. Did you think about your next of kin please!?

Last, I know a lot of guy with big, long n powerful gun n girl with Murchison Waterfall. You all like to enjoy, play n show but "PLEASE BE RESPONSIBLE"!
*
second sister got hep b

how about her husband?

hep b is spread the same way like HIV
w19
post Jan 13 2025, 08:46 AM

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QUOTE(Blofeld @ Jan 13 2025, 12:54 AM)
second sister got hep b

how about her husband?

hep b is spread the same way like HIV
*
Husband dont have before know her.

Now, Hep B carrier.

To stop all this, the only way is those with any genetic disease please stop produce baby.

Maybe, you can say carrier is nothing. Its true but once active, 2 choice. 1. safe you but money n soul half gone. 2. money n soul gone.

If you think its not serious!? Try let insurance company know you are this n that carrier then you want buy insurance. They will sell to you with a lot of exclusion. Even you dont let them know, if they find out this disease by genetic. Insurance will not cover.

In life, most of time you can play around but not for genetic disease!!!!!!!!!!


toottut89
post Jan 13 2025, 12:02 PM

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QUOTE(w19 @ Jan 11 2025, 11:29 PM)
Bro, Im very sorry I will say "BIG NO"! Please forgive me.

Be Responsibility!

My experience! My parent without any health problem.

1. Older sister first husband (Thalassemia Carrier) Increase risk of blood cancer. Open secret most of blood cancer patient are thalassemia carrier. If you are carrier, most of advance country will not accept you for migration. Its a dangerous genetic disease!

-Never do any per-married check. She didnt know it after baby out (1 Baby). A lot of problem. Time Bomb. Now divorce already.

2. Second sister (Hep B)

-Sis know it but husband say its nothing. She didnt know how she get it. All family member dont have. She almost die when she was early 20 as bacteria active. 3 Baby, all carrier. Time Bomb.

3. Bro in law (Thalassemia Carrier) (Wife side) (Family all keep mouth shut)

-Never do any per-married check. Mother pass away when he just a baby. Now, with only daughter (Thalassemia Carrier). A lot of problem. Time Bomb. The husband is excellent person. Once he know it, he stop all the family plan. This is right character we need in this world.

As a responsibility person, please make a full check up on all genetic disease.

Hep A, B, C, Thalassemia, Aids, STD n more.

I hope anyone with dangerous genetic disease carrier please stop produce baby. Be responsible person. This is only way to stop all this!

Im serious. This is not joke. Dont believe, please ask doctor you know about tsunami of thalassemia in Malaysia!

Maybe you can say money can overcome any disease but not Thalassemia! Once active, you got 2 choice. Both also send you half way to hell. First, huge medical fee. Maybe safe you but your soul n money half gone. Second, money n soul all gone. Did you think about your next of kin please!?

Last, I know a lot of guy with big, long n powerful gun n girl with Murchison Waterfall. You all like to enjoy, play n show but "PLEASE BE RESPONSIBLE"!
*
ermmmm.....but TS is having heart condition and not the TLDR aids your sister has, stick to the topic.

w19
post Jan 13 2025, 12:06 PM

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QUOTE(toottut89 @ Jan 13 2025, 12:02 PM)
ermmmm.....but TS is having heart condition and not the TLDR aids your sister has, stick to the topic.
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He need doctor not partner. Be responsible.
kopiride
post Jan 13 2025, 12:16 PM

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QUOTE(TearsFromMe @ Jan 10 2025, 08:49 PM)
Hi there, know her for 2 months, everything going well with outings, at first i just wanna treat her as friend but the times goes on and now many hints that she like me, of course i like her too...

BUT she doesnt know my heart condition yet. (My heart condition might need an open heart surgery in short future)

So when is the right time to tell her my condition? Or end just this friendship? Any other good advise??
*
What heart condition? How old are you guys. WHen you said in future need open heart surgery, how long into the future? If young and do surgery, and you both are just couple not married, don't expect her to be there for you please. People have their life. Unless you married already then different.
Since both not even couple yet why think so much. Just one day casually bring up about your heart condition. The rest let her digest. If she still likes you then sure can become couple. If not, then just friends. Don't think so much.
w19
post Jan 13 2025, 02:46 PM

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Serious, I really hate those self fish person (Genetic Disease Carrier)!

Today in newspaper another genetic disease parent request public donate RM200k for helping his son (Genetic Disease)! As adult, u know its will happen but u still do it. Now, u ask public help u to clean up. On other hand, it's can't clean up until he forget wake up. It's time bomb. Beside that, did u know ur kid are suffer please!? Did u ask him before u bring him here please!? If he is not a kid, 101% he will fcuk you as irresponsible person! Kid should not be here at all!

Genetic disease is "Time Bomb"! If its kill you one shot then easy! The problem it's not. It's come n go in ur whole life if u are unlucky. Its worse that forget wake up.

This is real world not fantasy. Please be responsible.

This post has been edited by w19: Jan 13 2025, 03:05 PM

 

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