Over the years, I've encountered cases of guys (friends and acquaintances-- not strangers) confessing to me after years of stalking me on social media. I didn't even know these secret admirers existed until they suddenly messaged me and asked if I was single and looking for a relationship.

When I gave them a chance to know each other better, they were excited... then they'd start overthinking... then they'd get insecure... and went quiet.

I was like ??? what's wrong with these guys??? 

For the context, these guys had been single for years + had prior failed relationships or had never been in a relationship before. Usually, I just leave them alone to process their own feelings, but honestly, I'm quite curious why this happens.

Why would a guy suppress himself so much when the girl he likes is single, available and is open to exploring a relationship together?

macam girl reject pun salah, accept pun salah. Then might as well the guy doesn't confess if he can't proceed??

Confusing behaviour to women. 

Ahh, I see... so guys do uhh search their existing contacts for available girls huh.

No, I'm not married yet. Was engaged but he called off due to his own issues. Then my secret admirers started appearing one by one... and they confused me. LOL.

I'm impressed with how spot on your are with your analysis. Yes, indeed, that coach guy has childhood trauma and bad relationship with his parents.
I'm not sure if it's because I'm experienced (with my ex) while he isn't (no gf before). So, this probably gives him anxiety and high self-expectations of 'performance'. I had to comfort him by saying uhh 'practice' makes perfect. 

Also, maybe, I think I might have unintentionally triggered him by asking this: "Assuming we do get along well, are you into marriage and children? Just wanna know if you're looking for companionship only or something more. Then I can set the right expectations. Some guys I met before didn't want to have further commitments."

His reply was he dunno yet and didn't think of it before.

& in our uhh rather 'hot and spicy' video call, I told him about the Kegel exercises that I did to strengthen my pelvic muscles to be able to 'grab' tightly and prepare well for giving birth. I said I started doing the exercises because my ex-fiancé and I were planning to have children back then. I was just honestly stating things as they were (not targeting at this guy), but on hindsight, I think I might have unintentionally caused this analyst guy to think far, farrrrr, farrrrrrrr into the future. Oops! 

His behaviour is so confusing to me because I thought we had initially agreed to non-sexual physical intimacy first; he asked and I accepted. Now he's avoiding me -- from super boiling hot to MIA 3 days now. He did say he couldn't tahan around me la... too hot for him. (I took it as a compliment )

I'm thinking probably uncharted territory scares him, and he needs the time to digest new possibilities.  After all, both of us are in our mid-thirties, single and compatible in many aspects-- I bet this is why he pursued me, but he probably got more than he bargained for.   

Haih. Didn't expect to potong stim halfway and get so puzzled and unsettled by his behaviour. Anyway, I understand he might need his time and space apart to process his emotions. Male brain operates differently from female's.

Wah Ramjade, I am so turned on by her words... especially that meow part... very seducing...

Are you not...  Around your age but old for me liao

Looks like our type...

Looks like you missed some parts.
I am sure her inboxes are full of messages by now. You got the advantage of staying in Klang Valley for a physical meetup, I am far north here in Penang haha. Grab the chance man.

These are general assumptions as a male. Here's a broader perspective: (It's long, but definitely thought-provoking especially for males.)

Using an analogy, think of Wonder Woman, or some DC/Marvel female heroines-- these are definitely alpha females whom most men won't take as housewives or working moms. For ease of discussion, let's just call them "strong women"-- feminine, sexy, intelligent, physically fit, agile, high status, powerful, etc.

Ordinary men cannot and dare not control such women, but let me tell you about another group of men who can: the alpha males. The strongest and the most confident men in the male population. The top 1-2%.

These men listen to strong women, because strong women don't nag nor fuss on petty stuff like ordinary women do. When strong women speak, they talk sense, not talk sh*t. Strong women are comrades and equal counterparts, and alpha males respect such women.

I've met alpha males, and my ex is one too. These men do not get intimidated by strong women. They are the top leaders and strongest hunters of their packs. They enjoy hunting strong prey, like a tigress, a lioness or a leopardess, tame them, and display them as their prized possessions in their captives.

That adrenaline rush in taming a strong woman, breaking her willpower to submit to you, and f*cking her damn hard till she begs to stop... can make a man blood boils like he's conquered an army. It is highly addictive because it is a testament to a man's prowess to hunt and tame a strong prey. Ordinary women who are as meek as lambs do not excite such men; too easy.

Men are biologically programmed to need sex and reproduce as many healthy and strong offspring, and having intercourse with some of the strongest women will produce the strongest offspring that will ensure the best genes get passed down.

This is especially true for ancient civilisations, such as the Spartans. Only the strong and fit men were able and allowed to reproduce, and Spartan women were strong and highly respected by Spartan males.

However, as human population increased after WWII (no major wars after that), the need to reproduce strong offspring has drastically declined, and the popular notion of romantic love in marriage diluted the pragmatic nature of marriage: to reproduce strong and healthy offspring in a secure and stable male-female partnership, approved by both families of equal status, resources and power.

Hypothesis: If mankind is endangered, men would, again, select strong females to reproduce. Strong mothers are able to give birth to strong offspring and survive all hardships.

*

From my observation, modern men have been emasculated due to a myriad of factors.

You can read this book: Of Boys and Men: Why the Modern Male Is Struggling, Why It Matters, and What to Do about It

which says: Boys and men are struggling. Profound economic and social changes of recent decades have many losing ground in the classroom, the workplace, and in the family. While the lives of women have changed, the lives of many men have remained the same or even worsened.

Economically independent women can now flourish whether they are wives or not. Wifeless men, by contrast, are often a mess. Compared to married men, their health is worse, their employment rates are lower, and their social networks are weaker.
“Hard times create strong men, strong men create good times, good times create weak men, and weak men create hard times.”
– G. Michael Hopf, USA Today bestselling author of post-apocalyptic fiction.

We are in good times, which is why there are more weak men now--- and these are the men who dislike strong women.

*

Lastly, respect is earned. You want a woman to listen to you, you earn her respect first.
Women are biologically programmed to respect strong men, adore them and submit to them.

So, if a man feels disrespected or overpowered by a woman, something is obviously wrong somewhere. Fix that, instead of blaming women. Weak men whine and blame, strong men refine and tame. 

By turning off excitement in your life, you are restricting the feminine energy within you and the women you're seeing/pursuing. A man who are overly stoic and repressed will not know how to properly love a woman in the way she can feel loved.

Feminine energy is essential creative, vibrant, nurturing, free-flowing and life-giving. This is why women need to have fun and love to have fun, because when they don't, they become more masculine (out of balance), which is not good as it affects her self-esteem and her interpersonal relationships, and other areas of life.

When a man is out a balance with himself (too much yang, lack yin), he sucks away feminine energy from women, and it is tiring for a women to love such a man. Extremely tiring.

A loving man is a giver. An unloved man is a taker. We all like givers more than takers, or at least, matchers who give and take equally.

With that said, you can set as many conditions as you want-- we all have our own ideals, nothing wrong with that, BUT you have to be fair. If you take one thing away from women, you compensate in another way that she can accept and still feel nurtured/loved by you. It isn't fair to take only but don't give in return-- this is self-serving for own gains and interests... at the loss of women.

Just giving my perspective. I'm sure you have your fine qualities, but if you want the women you're looking for, do consider these factors.

After dating with many girls I disagree with this statement... modern day girls are not like our mothers from the 80s or 70s. Women's rights and that MeToo thingie are all over the place now. They deserve their enjoyment as much as men lah.

We should see woman as an accompaniment but not a means to an end to fulfill our goal... they are not our "tools", so to speak.

These days I try to keep an open mind and tolerate with different girl's behaviours. It makes my dating life easier and mor enjoyable as well.

Like my high school classmate brought me to badminton lessons and we dine together afterwards. Something new to explore for me and I indulge in the fun as well.

Update:

He pissed me off when he requested to DIY together instead of meeting me in person. We're just 30-45 mins away from each other, and yet he popomama didn't wanna come and see me. Want cybersxx pulak.

In total, 5 times he initiated, 5 times he FFK (cancelled meeting me).

I finally exploded, and texted + voice messaged him how I felt: disappointed, sad, unloved and confused. I said he seemed so close yet so distant, and sometimes I wondered if he was just teasing me and playing with my feelings. I told him straight that I liked him, but I was also confused. I asked him directly how he felt towards me, and said that I needed time and space apart, and would only talk to him when I felt better again. 

He read my messages and heard my voice message instantly (could see he's kamchiong  ), but he didn't reply.

Good. I want him to go reflect and sort out his emotions fully. Damn annoyed. Never met such a mangkuk guy before. Urgh!!!!!

... but at the same time, I still feel he's so cute. He likes me a lot but is so scared to proceed, like an inexperienced boy boy. OK la, to be fair, I suspect he's a fearful avoidant-- crave love yet avoid love. No wonder still single for yearssssss and never have a gf before.

Anyway, enough of hotness, time for some cold treatment. According to my relationship book, I should implement no contact for at least 30 days, and I'm gonna do it.    Sometimes, people dunno what they have until it's gone. Cliché, but true.

Meanwhile, I keep myself happy by chatting with new guys... If tak jadi with this mangkuk guy, I will move on, again. Have to la; ain't gonna wait forever for mangkuk to 开窍 (be enlightened).

This is the oddest thing to happen after my breakup with ex. Mangkuk guy kinda resembles my ex: same height, same studies, similar profession, tall and well-built, high IQ but low EQ/SQ --- God! Why are you sending another guy to 'torture' me??! & Why am I attracting/attracted to the same kind of guy?!

Haih. Susah. That's why ranting here late at night. Pardon me.

Thanks for saying those comforting words. They do help me to think more positively of him.

Seems like a lot is going on in his mind/heart. Just gotta be patient with him.  :thumbsup:

My relationship with ex is far more complicated than I'm telling here. He was my first love and first man, and he saved my life. For years, he built me up from the broken pieces I was. I was his project, his masterpiece, his creation. This is why I am faithful to him, wait for him, and will always love him. How can I not love my... human saviour and creator?

However, like any relationships, we had our turbulent downs due to differences and stressors in life, and LDR made it even more challenging for us to cope as a couple.

Why we could last for so long in LDR... well, he's based in Singapore, while I'm in Selangor; we aren't that far apart. Whenever he came to see me, he 'fed' me well emotionally and physically-- made me super happy in and out of bed. The exception was during Covid-- 3 years of lockdown/travel restriction was truly depressing for me.

This year, he said hurtful words and disappeared physically for 6 months. It was really a long time... I felt so sad, unwanted, and touch-starved until I decided to leave him starting 1 Sept 2024...

*

& si mangkuk was the first to message me on 3 Sept 2024... I suspect he's been observing my newsfeed and analysing my behavioural pattern... like, why the timing was so cun?  stalker analyst kah ni

How he confessed... was kinda raw. It's a 7-sentence process.

He said:

He's that simple and direct. Just 2-3 words per sentence. So raw until I found him so cute.

& I responded positively to him. I guess it probably blew up his mind and uhh over-stimulated him and his lil head. Brain fused with behavioral abnormality.

If a player's brain is 32GB RAM, I think his is just 1GB RAM when it comes to relationship. Experienced dudes won't confess in such a crude manner and could take the 'spicy-ness'... and would quickly pounce on me.

*

So ya, ex is having meltdown, while si mangkuk is in push-pull mode.

The best decision for me right now... is to give these two men enough time to process their thoughts and feelings... and observe their actions... what they will do for me, for us. If they don't do anything, then I don't have to choose them. Time will tell.

Wish it could be that easy. It's hard to move on when things aren't clear nor conclusive yet, when both parties are still emo, and the relationship still have open loops and possibilities.

Most women (and some men) need closures to be able to move on. For me, I need proper closures because I hate to have regrets in life.

Regrets are some of the worst feelings to live with, and will forever haunt the affected. I'd rather be sad, stressed and emo for now... than to suffer from a lifetime of regrets later on, and spend my remaining years asking myself whyyyy I didn't do this or that back then when I had the chance to make amendments and change the ending... This is why I am giving them time. I am being compassionate to them, and I'm being wise by seeing things long-term. There is no time pressure to solve relationship issues.

Why people pressure themselves with hasty decisions in relationship... is because they have low tolerance for pain. They want instant solution and gratification to whatever that hurt them, and this is actually bad for personal growth and emotional maturity. So, don't get into any committed relationship/marriage if pleasure is all you seek (referring to men and women, in general).

I had met men who tried to cut relationship mess by making hasty decisions. Guess what? They're the most suppressed men because they didn't do their proper closure and healing; became emotionally unavailable and had issues in subsequent relationships or trusting women again or getting committed again.

Just because things are numb in the conscious mind, doesn't mean it will disappear in the subconscious mind. This is why there are more men who suffer from substance abuse, addictions, and get mentally ill until commit suicide... as compared to women.

Because you haven't loved any woman deeply enough yet...

and the one special woman who can change you hasn't appeared yet...

The day you meet her... is the day you become so-not-yourself.

This is when you'll start to realise more and feel the depth of emotions...

and experience the power of love... in the most unexpected way.

Everything about her will trigger your biological instinct as a man. You will try hard to resist and fight all your feelings, but you can't get her out of your mind and system.

She's like a virus that will infect every single part of you, and you'll be so love-smitten that you think and act abnormally...

Single men usually scoff when I tell them this, but when it happens to them... hehehe

So, never say never. 😉

you know, you sound like that coach guy I met. Super resistant to anything that makes him "irrational" and "lose control"

... which means, you're an emotionally unavailable man-- just don't want to feel anything with women or have any mushy, touchy-feely emotions.

Your feminine energy is shut off, and it's up to you if you wanna re-activate it, and heal it to be wholesome again.

I may be wrong, but only you know what your situation is like, and it is up to you how you wanna live your life.

Whatever it is, make decisions that bring you peace, harmony, happiness, good energy and inner balance to you life... and no regrets.

Ramjade i think this is a solid advice.

Sticking to goals and choosing a life of maximum efficiency is good and all, but sometime life is more colorful and worth living if you just let your hair down a bit and see where it takes you, the outcome might surprise you

Not related to relationship but i think its the same for FIRE financially. We should focus to enjoy the journey not just solely the destination.

You should read this FB post: Japanese man spent 21 years saving frugally
Yeah, this Jap man is extremely frugal and saved a lot, but...  go read what people comment about his lifestyle, and go read how he questioned his own decision after 21 years of FIRE.

If you really wanna retire early and be rich, go talk to a certified financial planner. Get a professional to map out your pathway to financial freedom for you. Currently, I feel you're overly brainwashed by FIRE and its community until you became imbalanced in your approach. Saving money is good, but anything extreme is bad.

& You sound like you have strong fear of poverty, which isn't good. Why? because money is energy. The more you want it, the more it doesn't want you. Money is attracted to people who have a mindset of abundance and generosity, not to people who have a mindset of poverty and stinginess.

Heard of the universal law of attraction? Yup, that's how things work. This is why men who have lost everything (read: no savings at all + in debt) but still be resilient and diligent can quickly make their wealth again. Look at this dude: Scammed Malaysian man cleared RM1 million debt in just 2 years

Writing these so that you can be more balanced in your approach under CFP guidance + have good energy again. You know that we all wish you well here, including TOS and Takudan.
Be a wise man. Be balanced. Be like water.

I'll answer your question that you ask those girls you met. In fact, someone asked me similar question 10 years ago, in 2014.

He asked me, "What's your plan B in life? If one day you can't work, how are you going to survive?"

I told him, "I believe God will have foreseen that so why should I worry? I just need to do what I can when I am still able to, and leave the rest to God."

He asked, "What if your God fails?"

I said, "Impossible. Only humans fail, not God."

The conversation ended this way. 

*

Now, 10 years later, I can confidently answer the same question. This month is my 51st month without a full-time job, not consecutively but accumulated. I took 3 career breaks of more than one year each, in 2018-2019, 2021, 2022-2023...

because, for some reasons, I don't have career luck. The past 4 companies that I worked at had management issues that resulted in high staff turnover of 40%-80%. I was so sick of corporate garbage, I grilled those employers/mid-level managers for their management failures, escalated to the CEO/MD, and I resigned. I hate wasting time in toxic environments.

I took the leap of faith to do biz full-time... after working for 18 employers (full-time, part-time and freelance) in the last 15 years. I felt damn jaded and worn out; was an workaholic who pursued money, career success and social status-- which turned out to be highly unsatisfying.

For several times, I quit my jobs abruptly without months of savings, because I didn't care how I was gonna survive. Maybe because I'm a woman-- when I get fed up, I just don't care anymore. Maybe it's an Aries thingy-- I do what I want, and I get what I want.

During those career breaks in the past few years, I started my own biz; not one, but three. & I designed my biz models the way I wanted it to work--- to give me the freedom of time and mobility. I didn't need to worry about money, because I had a group of super rich biz friends and companies who would support me kaw-kaw, including government agencies. When my first biz was just launched, within several months, gov agencies were already paying for my flight, hotel and accommodation.

& I have strong biz luck. In my third biz, clients look for me. I did projects for SMEs and MNCs. Each project was in thousands, up to tens of thousands. When most people need a year to earn the same amount, I can earn in just several months. Just last year alone, I closed about 30 projects by myself. My biggest client was a Fortune 500 Global Top 40 foreign MNC. My other clients were in industry technology, franchises, importers, logistics, etc.

Then I got kinda tired of doing projects. So, I focused on my another biz this year. I joint-venture with another company that has strong network and resources. They looked for me first because they needed my expertise. Now, my JV partner is in China, to set up a subsidiary there. We're distributing our products to China soon, besides Malaysia, Korean and other countries in ASEAN, and some in EU. For the JV, it's a 50-50 split between me and them. I'm gearing towards building up passive income now, in multiple currencies.

The way I think and do things are quite unique, after having worked for about 50 companies, employment + projects in more than 10 industries... and I am just 35 years old.

To me, as long as I'm still breathing and my brain still functions, even if I'm physically disabled suddenly (touch wood), I'll get lots of insurance payout and I'll just continue to create wealth-- from a wheelchair or from bed. This is how chill (or fearless) I am.

I'm sharing all these to state that my pathway to financial freedom is not through FIRE, but through business success-- products, systems, automation. I excel in leveraging, bartering, and forming collaborations/JVs. For services, I hire people to do the job, and I earn from their hard work. I feel great creating jobs for people.

I have my own property, car, decent EPF savings, PRS funds, insurance and its regular payouts--- not too bad, for someone in her thirties. If I marry my ex, our family house is a bungalow, in millions. He's rich in SGD, so converted to MYR... hmm... nice.

I changed my own fate this way, by being highly educated, working hard, attracting higher-tier people into my life, doing biz, planning strategically... I didn't come from a rich family; quite the contrary. I hate being poor, so I worked my way out and up.

There's a term for it: lifestyle design.
*

You know, the truly wealthy don't save their way to wealth; they do business and investment, and they succeed in it. I'm sure you know the cashflow quadrant by Robert Kiyosaki. If you don't, look it up.

Challenge yourself to go beyond FIRE. To me, an employee that practises FIRE is still an employee-- their love staying in their comfort zone, their social circles and perspectives are still the same, and their money-making skills will always stay the same. Even if they start a biz after their early retirement... nah, I think it's just too risky for them to think about biz. Once you're stuck in a fixed mindset, it's hard to change it--- and this is a lurking danger in an ever-changing, fast-paced world.

Also, factoring in currency depreciation and inflation, RM500k today will probably be like RM100k twenty years later. To me, that's absurd. Imagine spending years of my life working my ass off, saving frugally and sacrificing pleasures, only to see it depreciated so much in my old age. This is not what I want. Years of youth spent on toiling... all wasted, not to mention that AI and automation tech + age factors will hinder one's opportunity to get hired. Basically, your chances of getting employed  will decrease dramatically once you are age 40 and above.

With the same willpower and discipline, I'd rather build businesses in my peak years (age 30 onwards)-- money-making systems with people to do the job for me, while I can relax by the seaside or work from anywhere I want in the world. Heard of The Four-Hour Workweek by Tim Feriss? Yup, I practise it, and I'm halfway there at 35 y.o. That's why I'm YOLO and have so much time on this forum, thinking of hot dudes and going on dates with men.

By the time I'm 40... I'm pretty sure everything will be much established in my biz, and I can continue to YOLO until my old age. Once you have the winning advantage, you utilise it to the max and keep reaping the returns. If things change again in the future, then I will ride the new waves and create a new legacy.

Just exposing you to a different perspective or way of life. You might disagree--- which, I don't care frankly, because ultimately, you are responsible for your own life and your choices as an adult.

If you think all these stories are made up, I can assure that they're not. There are at least 10 people on this forum who know me in real life, so there's really not much point for me to fake things and be inconsistent with who I am. My life is just an unusual as it gets, and I'm fine with it.

Ah nice, going to grab my lunch. I woke up at 12 noon today. This is my lifestyle every day, and I like it. 

I am not a local Selangorian. I built up my connections/networks from ground zero. I worked hard in my twenties, juggling multiple jobs. At any one time, you'd see me with 1 full-time, 1 part-time and 1 freelance. I had no social life, and that was my lifestyle for years when my peers were having fun. I was so hungry for growth and success that I wouldn't want to waste time on leisure. I had enough of poverty, and I wanted to change my fate.

In my thirties, I used to work 16-22 hours a day to kick start my biz. Lots of things to figure out: getting clients, handling objections, closing deals, preparing invoices/contracts, sourcing manpower, establishing workflow, setting the standards, doing marketing, networking, researching, biz strategizing and planning, and the list goes on.

The initial stages were the hardest, as I didn't have any biz background nor biz degree. I learned everything through reading and attending classes, and practised on my own.

*

I started each of my biz with less than RM200 (for SSM registration, biz email address, and a biz number... that's it.). My biz sifu (who's an NLP master trainer/coach) challenged me to make money from the least amount of capital.

... and I did. I succeeded, and reaped the returns multifold. Certain times, when the cashflow was unstable or payments from clients were delayed, I worked part-time jobs or freelance again. As I mentioned before-- improvise, adapt, overcome. This means being resilient, resourceful and having pure grit as a true entrepreneur.

& I believe luck can be created. Luck arises when preparation meets opportunity. This means that you can create chances through intentional choices and behaviors.

I changed my social circles, I attended mindset classes to reprogramme how I think and behave, I studied the law of attraction and energy, I picked up new skills and knowledge, and I gradually got to where I am today.

Behind the smooth launch and preliminary success is sweat and tears. I launched biz during the pandemic, and the pain from forced LDR and years of separation-- I channeled that energy to biz building. I cried a lot while sitting in front of the PC and figuring biz stuff out, because I missed my ex and felt sad over the wedding that didn't happen.

So, that's my journey.

*

My favourite quote is "A bird sitting on a tree is never afraid of the branch breaking, because its trust is not on the branch but on its own wings."

Whenever I face obstacles, I see them as strong winds that will push me to flap my wings harder, and through this process, I become excellent in flying, and I can soar higher once the storm is over.

Whatever that is hard or daunting for me to do, I will do it. I don't like and don't want to stay in comfort zones for too long. I don't like to be controlled by fears and self-imposed limits.

This extends to doing challenging sports, such as progressing from indoor gym to outdoor hiking to rock-climbing to mountain-hiking. Physical sports do build massive confidence. I trained my body to do sports on empty stomach, and I could exercise for hours without feeling faint, such as walking from my home to the nearby hill, hiked to the top, and walked back home. 5 hours in total, no food, just drink plain water. At the gym, I can do 3 hours of workout per session, including cardio, weights, machines and group classes. This is the kind of physical training I pushed myself to go through.

So, always believe in yourself that you are capable of achieving greater things in life--- only if you want to, and are willing to pay the price to get to that height. Be in that 2% of the whole population:



Seriously, our only limits to personal growth and success is ourselves--- not our family, not our jobs, not our finances or any other factors--- all these can be solved, figured out, adjusted, changed, etc.

Our biggest enemy is ourselves. We stop ourselves from becoming great because we don't believe that we can, or we don't push ourselves hard enough, or we don't persevere long enough.

To me, as long as you (any person) have a healthy body and sane mind, you can reprogramme your mind to turn your situation around and live the life you want. Just like an old cranky computer that has outdated OS, software and hardware, you scrap those old stuff, and reinstall the new system and hardware, and you're good to go again.

*

However, this process is extremely painful for most people, as they need to deal with what's in their subconscious mind: all the hidden fears, anxieties, insecurities, past hurts, childhood wounds, etc... will surface as you re-programme your mind.

For me, it took about 5-7 years of several mindset breakthroughs, and the recent one happened in early Sept 2024. The neuro-semantics coach was showing some videos, and they broke my old beliefs. I broke down during the workshop and cried all the way driving home, and I continued to cry at home.

... because I finally aligned different parts of myself, found my new sense of meaning in life, and my bigger purpose... All those fears, insecurities etc that I used to have-- disappeared. Heck, I was so happy and confident that I started posting videos of myself online, singing songs-- and I didn't care what people thought of me (surprisingly, my friends liked and asked me to sing more. haha)

That workshop was called "The Ultimate Self-Actualization Workshop", created by L. Michael Hall, PhD. He's a Cognitive Psychologist who through research into NLP and Self-Actualization Psychology. He co-founded the ISNS (International Society of Neuro-Semantics) and the MCF (Meta-Coaching Foundation) and is an internationally renowned trainer.

*

To conclude,

You're a disciplined person when you started practising FIRE--- have to salute to you for this dedication. This is why I took the time to write. I hope my sharing today can, well, shed some light. This conversation is not a coincidence, but a divine arrangement. So, just be open-minded to consider different perspectives, and see how you can apply some of those useful ones to your own life. All roads lead to Rome; see you at the top.  :thumbsup: