She doesn't know about it but make me feel guilty and depress when think of it. Dont know why but my heart and mind keep thinking of EX2 even though my time with EX2 is shorter compare with EX1 which already together for 4 year.

Since EX1 come back stay with me pending go back to home country even when with her I always think of EX2. Problem is when i have sex sessio with EX1, I mind would occasionally think amd imagine itself that I doing it with EX2. Even when almost fall asleep when sleep with EX1, my mind would imagine itsef I sleep with EX2. And knowing I would never meet EX2 again and with such imagination cropping up in my mind time to time always make me depress this till cannot sleep unless my mind really tired.

I try to cut off communication with EX2 so I would not be thinking of her and for awhile it work but when EX2 start communicate with me I will fall into sadness again. I want to delete our photo together but afraid to do it since this is the only memories I have with EX2

Additional info me and EX2 is different coutries and thats what make my situation worser

Problem I more toward EX2 than EX1 but I'm sure EX2 just treat me as someone pass by and that is what make it hurt and depres more because knowing I will never be with EX2 and worse we in two different country. If choose EX1 will be unfair to her as now my feeling to her is like BFF or own family member and I forsee our issue will be the same keep arguing.