The problem is not you not caring about your own funeral.

The problem is can you throw your daddy and mummy into sea, river, space, etc.

When it comes to your turn, the headache is on your kids not you. The money comes from your kids not from you.

It will be difficult when the time comes. Guilt, sadness whatever.

Maybe an easy way of thinking will be this: if it were your father/mother, will you be willing to? even if they told you to go ahead.

Probably the only way to force it will be to put it into your will lol, throw me into the sea or else you get nothing lol.

I already mentioned before, the fella that died couldn't care less lol. The only problem is the family.

Good for you.

The problem isn't the old guy. As I have repeated many times, the old guy is gone, the end. No post credits scene. What happens after is of no consequence to him. The problem is with the family.



Unfortunately, we don't live in a vacuum, people and kids can be cruel and insensitive.

If you can handle it that's great. Even better if you have trained your kids to handle it with grace.

lol, post got reported

if you can't even stomach something from random nobodies in an internet forum, how do you expect to be able to handle the criticism from "well meaning friends and family"?

I buy condo onli RM30k+ for twin sharing lol. But quite many years back, I think >10 years liao.

Funeral package didn't buy. Let the kids figure that one out. Don't want to do anything, just cremate and move into condo.

lol /k demographic full of old farts. our hobby is reading obituaries to see if there is anybody we know.

We did think a lot about that. But I think at that time, we were undecided because we didn't want to make our kids feel like they were forced into doing it. Also, both of them were young at that time, donno if they were going to work in Malaysia or move elsewhere.

So we ended up doing the minimum, just cremate and a place to put the ashes. As for the funeral service, suka hati depa la. I think my wife picked out the clothes and the pictures, but that's about it I think.

Hopefully, the funeral parlor guys will be like tow truck operators in a car accident lol. In an accident these guys will reach faster than any ambulance or police car.

who knows.

but the truth is sometimes not easy to hear.

we are not religious types, but my wife and I bought a spot at the columbarium for ourselves so that our kids will not be asked these questions.

anybody ask, "oh, they prepared everything earlier"

It is a Si Tanggang thing versi type C.

In the olden days in China, it was even worse. The whole family is expected to mourn for months or years when the elderly passes. That is for orang marhaen. Emperor can even ask for people to be buried with him.

The many days required for the wake is usually because back in olden China, they had to allow enough days for the family to gather to pay their final respects. It is not for showing off.

It is much reduced nowadays. Give it a few more generations and it should reduce even more. But for now, expectations are such that if your kids do nothing, your kids will need to prepare to kena kecam.

This post has been edited by loserguy: Aug 9 2024, 08:42 AM