This kind of thing, you cannot plan one. If you plan ahead even few seconds, the scenario will come off as awkward and not natural. But as beginner just keep doing until you learn from failures

how many girls have you gone out in this month?
If you have gone out a lot, you dont need to ask this kind of question cause of real experiences

some day you can be touchy feely and get the attraction
some day you can just rely on your eye contact and voice to get the attraction

there's really no one way fits all

a girl may tell A guy dont touch her on first three dates
but suddenly she let the B guy touch her because there's an unspoken chemistry happening