People ask me why, as an atheist, I still say: OH MY GOD.
It makes perfect sense: We say "Oh my God" when something is UNBELIEVABLE.

There are 2 types of people in this world:
People who say they pee in the shower, and the dirty fucking liars.

Decimal: 1 + 1 = 2
Binary:  1 + 1 = 10
Boolean: 1 + 1 = 1
JavaScript(hold my beer) : 1 + 1 = 11

Project Manager:
A person who thinks 9 women can deliver a baby in 1 month.

I think therefore I am
not religious.

Even if being gay were a choice, so what?
People choose to be assholes and they can get married.

Governments are like diapers.
They should be changed often, and for the same reason.

Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat.

What's the best thing about UDP jokes?
I don't care if you get them.

A programmer had a problem, so he decided to use threads.
Now 2 has. He problems

Documentation is like sex:
when it's good, it's very, very good;
when it's bad, it's better than nothing.

To most religious people, the holy books are like a software license (EULA).
Nobody actually reads it. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree".

# UNIX command line Russian roulette:
[ $[ $RANDOM % 6 ] == 0 ] && rm -rf /* || echo *Click*

I can't see an end. I have no control and I don't think there's any escape.
I don't even have a home anymore.
I think it's time for a new keyboard.

Q: Why do we need a backend, why not just connect front end to database???
A: Yeah! And why do we eat and go to the bathroom while we can throw the food
directly in the toilet? Because stuff needs to get processed.

Martin Golding
Always code as if the guy who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent
psychopath who knows where you live.

L. Peter Deutsch
To iterate is human, to recurse divine.