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Advice Wanted Been tortured by wife for a year

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TSvandies
post Oct 1 2022, 10:23 AM, updated 2y ago

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My wife is a foreigner, involved in pyramid scheme end up find guy outside to take free money to pay debt. Left me alone on all the important dates including my birthday, while I wait her to come back alone at home.

She’s been sleeping with the guy under same roof for more than half year.

Promise to cut off with the guy countless time, everytime stop for few day or week then continue, promise to sign divorce EVERY month end up reach marriage office purposely don’t bring enough document and sweet talk asking not to divorce or simply ask me to wait without giving me a date to wait for. Message me saying miss me everyday while sleeping with the guy.

Above bs has been going on for a year now.

Post on every social media about her sweet moment with him, this only reduce after i threaten to sue her.

The guy also challenge me by video calling me while she is with him, message me telling me everyday screw my wife. I told the guy she don’t want sign divorce mean she doesn’t love him, tell him to cooperate with me to get evidence so that i can sue her in foreign court to get a divorce easily then he can have everything he want but he don’t give a fuck at all. Rich parents I believe, continue give her money like waterfish.

I tell her family members about this and also insulted them, but don’t care also.

My friend advice me to hire PI collect evidence and sue her in foreign court, but if can i really don’t want to spend too much money on this. Threaten no use, she say want fight with me in court.

My parent advice me to wait 3 year of separation so i can sue for divorce at minimal cost, telling me she is the one that will be losing because she is wasting her prime time, the problem is I am not sure if i can endure mentally for 3 years, and if I am dating who is going accept me as I am currently engaged?

Fyi I am only married in foreign country, I think didn’t register in Malaysia unless she let me sign document that I am not aware of, she’s been trying hard to get me to register our marriage in malaysia for quiet awhile already, but i insist not to as i can see she is not ready to be a “good wife” yet.

My assets all bought locally before married, nothing she can get from me, but die also don’t want to divorce with me.

I don’t know if i can and if it is legal to marry again in malaysia without divorce in foreign marriage beforehand?

I have also thought of using the illegal ways to end this thing as both of them treat me like a pussy cat. I’ve run out of patience getting toss around like a toy for a year now.

My life currently is very miserable, no mood to do anything for a year already, everyday do useless thing to past time and I can’t see when I can get out of this mess.

Looking for more opinion and advice as i really can’t decide what is the best way to get out of this mess asap 🥹
AbbyCom
post Oct 1 2022, 10:37 AM

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Your wife's status in Malaysia? Social visit pass?
kens88`
post Oct 1 2022, 10:39 AM

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get her deported lol

lawrencesha
post Oct 1 2022, 10:49 AM

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QUOTE(vandies @ Oct 1 2022, 10:23 AM)
My assets all bought locally before married, nothing she can get from me, but die also don’t want to divorce with me.
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You are delusional. Once married, she owe half of everything you do - unless you had a prenup.
viole
post Oct 1 2022, 01:13 PM

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Your asset is all local. You are not registered in malaysia.

So actually you are not married in malaysia? Then why afraid?
TSvandies
post Oct 1 2022, 07:13 PM

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QUOTE(AbbyCom @ Oct 1 2022, 10:37 AM)
Your wife's status in Malaysia? Social visit pass?
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Yes, previously tried to sweet talk me to do visa for her but I didn't do it.

QUOTE(kens88` @ Oct 1 2022, 10:39 AM)
get her deported lol
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Can't, she came here legally

QUOTE(viole @ Oct 1 2022, 01:13 PM)
Your asset is all local. You are not registered in malaysia.

So actually you are not married in malaysia? Then why afraid?
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Yes not married in malaysia unless she had me sign document that I am not aware of. I want to get out of this mess asap, wanted to have a fresh life, but she doesn't allow me to get away and continue to mentally torture me.


AbbyCom
post Oct 1 2022, 07:15 PM

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QUOTE(lawrencesha @ Oct 1 2022, 10:49 AM)
You are delusional. Once married, she owe half of everything you do - unless you had a prenup.
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Prenup not enforceable in Malaysia, the country where they registered marriage, dunno.
viole
post Oct 1 2022, 07:15 PM

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QUOTE(vandies @ Oct 1 2022, 07:13 PM)
Yes, previously tried to sweet talk me to do visa for her but I didn't do it.
Can't, she came here legally
Yes not married in malaysia unless she had me sign document that I am not aware of. I want to get out of this mess asap, wanted to have a fresh life, but she doesn't allow me to get away and continue to mentally torture me.
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What do you mean you cant get out. You are not in the situation at all, legally speaking.

Just kick her out from your own house. If she dont want, call police.


AbbyCom
post Oct 1 2022, 07:17 PM

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QUOTE(vandies @ Oct 1 2022, 07:13 PM)
Yes, previously tried to sweet talk me to do visa for her but I didn't do it.
Can't, she came here legally
Yes not married in malaysia unless she had me sign document that I am not aware of. I want to get out of this mess asap, wanted to have a fresh life, but she doesn't allow me to get away and continue to mentally torture me.
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Social visit pass will expire annually.

She ask you to sign document also no use, normally it's the Malaysian spouse that knows how to register marriage in Malaysia and both parties need to submit document or be present - takkan you didn't know you go to Jabatan Pendaftaran Negara or not?

AbbyCom
post Oct 1 2022, 07:19 PM

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QUOTE(viole @ Oct 1 2022, 07:15 PM)
What do you mean you cant get out. You are not in the situation at all, legally speaking.

Just kick her out from your own house. If she dont want, call police.
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I tend to agree, TS kena greenhat from top of head to ankle d, still thinking of what to do?

TS, find a phreaking lawyer to advise you rather than /k's help.
TSvandies
post Oct 1 2022, 08:36 PM

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QUOTE(viole @ Oct 1 2022, 07:15 PM)
What do you mean you cant get out. You are not in the situation at all, legally speaking.

Just kick her out from your own house. If she dont want, call police.
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We already separated more than half year, sometime she will ask me meet up to manipulate me that she is going to start being a good person and to make sure I am not seeing someone else. If didn't divorce means I still have string attached to her, if I choose the option given by my parents, I have to force myself to not give a damn about them for 3 years which is difficult, even after 3 year I still have to file case in foreign court, but should be easier and cheaper.

QUOTE(AbbyCom @ Oct 1 2022, 07:17 PM)
Social visit pass will expire annually.

She ask you to sign document also no use, normally it's the Malaysian spouse that knows how to register marriage in Malaysia and both parties need to submit document or be present - takkan you didn't know you go to Jabatan Pendaftaran Negara or not?
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I did go to malaysia embassy, so I am not very sure if I did sign some document or not. She promised me AGAIN to sign for divorce this month, if she lie this time yeah I am going to consult lawyer.
viole
post Oct 1 2022, 09:35 PM

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QUOTE(vandies @ Oct 1 2022, 08:36 PM)
We already separated more than half year, sometime she will ask me meet up to manipulate me that she is going to start being a good person and to make sure I am not seeing someone else. If didn't divorce means I still have string attached to her, if I choose the option given by my parents, I have to force myself to not give a damn about them for 3 years which is difficult, even after 3 year I still have to file case in foreign court, but should be easier and cheaper.
I did go to malaysia embassy, so I am not very sure if I did sign some document or not. She promised me AGAIN to sign for divorce this month, if she lie this time yeah I am going to consult lawyer.
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She ask to meet up and then you meet up? And what she can do about it because your marriage is not legal here. Means that you are single.

Its either this is a kool story, or you are really a pussy cat like your wife claim you are.

Either case, only you can help yourself to end this delusion or being a pussy cat.
Chaud
post Oct 3 2022, 08:15 AM

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if you're not legally married in malaysia, why still scared?

in fact i think you can already ghost off and start a new life also
ZzZzz...
post Oct 3 2022, 10:52 AM

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where origin she from?
cycheah
post Oct 3 2022, 10:53 AM

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where the hell are you?

i think you get everyone confused. you register marriage in foreign land but not in malaysia?

if you cheapskate don't want to hire PI and lawyer to fight the case, ready to drop everything and come back malaysia, she can't do shit to you in here as in malaysia both of you are stranger in law. if she naik gila in malaysia, just call the police and they will handle.

or check the law in the country you are staying, if separate staying for certain period would allow you divorce without consent like malaysia is 2 years, then just be patiencely wait, proof both of you aren't staying together that period... poof you go

This post has been edited by cycheah: Oct 3 2022, 10:58 AM
iOnine
post Oct 3 2022, 11:03 AM

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which foreign country? have any plan to go back to the country?

i guess ure non-muslim. have you check JPN (or relevant dept) on your status still bujang/kahwin? if bujang means, block them off and move on le. just spend some time to check on ur status first.
ymc2303
post Oct 3 2022, 11:50 AM

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if you have proof of her infidelity, take it to the legal.. first get yourself out from this misery first..
OlgaC4
post Oct 3 2022, 12:32 PM

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QUOTE(ymc2303 @ Oct 3 2022, 11:50 AM)
if you have proof of her infidelity, take it to the legal.. first get yourself out from this misery first..
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Yes take her to court for infidelity must have proof. The judge will side you.
bourse
post Oct 3 2022, 01:10 PM

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go to any JPN office and check first. very easy and it does not cost much.

if JPN say you are still single, then no need to layan her anymore.

JPN is where you do a new IC tempat.

ragk
post Oct 6 2022, 05:07 PM

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QUOTE(vandies @ Oct 1 2022, 08:36 PM)
We already separated more than half year, sometime she will ask me meet up to manipulate me that she is going to start being a good person and to make sure I am not seeing someone else. If didn't divorce means I still have string attached to her, if I choose the option given by my parents, I have to force myself to not give a damn about them for 3 years which is difficult, even after 3 year I still have to file case in foreign court, but should be easier and cheaper.
I did go to malaysia embassy, so I am not very sure if I did sign some document or not. She promised me AGAIN to sign for divorce this month, if she lie this time yeah I am going to consult lawyer.
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Why bother to entertain her invitation? You already get out physically, u are just not letting yourself out mentally. Even you go to the other half of the world u still wont get out if u trap ur self mentally.


 

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