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K0MR4DE
post May 31 2022, 02:26 PM

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Still following TS relationship journey! Aiyoo~ I really thought Girl A got potential, see first how this plays out
Daprind
post May 31 2022, 04:54 PM

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Have you tried to find out if girl A already attached or not? instead of assuming this and that...
TSAshenOne
post May 31 2022, 09:40 PM

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QUOTE(K0MR4DE @ May 31 2022, 02:26 PM)
Still following TS relationship journey! Aiyoo~ I really thought Girl A got potential, see first how this plays out
*
Yep see first, things can change unexpectedly when you least expect it.
Back in my other Ex company I met a girl I considered as "out of league", she is desirable and super wealthy, her instagram all travelling photos with her family.

I only did WhatsApp her once in a while, greet her in office when we met, never once I thought she would invite me out 1 on 1 in some random day.
The date went really well, but I didn't push it to happy ending when she allows it, after that she didn't find me again, perhaps offended by my inaction.

QUOTE(Daprind @ May 31 2022, 04:54 PM)
Have you tried to find out if girl A already attached or not? instead of assuming this and that...
*
That is one of the big thing I wish to find out, I checked her fingers as 1 of the forumer guided me, she doesn't have any ring in Ring finger.
I also tried to lead the texting conversation in a way for her to have plenty of chances to tell me if she is attached or not, such as:

a) Any plans for weekend? (If attached, most likely will say going to meet her boyfriend.)
b) Where you get that ring from? (Could be gift from bf)

None of her answers lead to any indication of being attached.
On the flip side, she continues to show up near my department area, she absolutely has no reason to do that.
I know for a fact that when you like someone, you want to appear near the person as often as possible.

But other times, she is inconsistent in system chat behavior, made me feel like she is not interested.
I don't know man, the silence in system chat continues to this day, I was very busy with my work anyway, it helps me focus more and get more work done without dealing with her.
Daprind
post Jun 1 2022, 10:40 AM

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QUOTE(AshenOne @ May 31 2022, 09:40 PM)
Yep see first, things can change unexpectedly when you least expect it.
Back in my other Ex company I met a girl I considered as "out of league", she is desirable and super wealthy, her instagram all travelling photos with her family.

I only did WhatsApp her once in a while, greet her in office when we met, never once I thought she would invite me out 1 on 1 in some random day.
The date went really well, but I didn't push it to happy ending when she allows it, after that she didn't find me again, perhaps offended by my inaction.

That is one of the big thing I wish to find out, I checked her fingers as 1 of the forumer guided me, she doesn't have any ring in Ring finger.
I also tried to lead the texting conversation in a way for her to have plenty of chances to tell me if she is attached or not, such as:

a) Any plans for weekend? (If attached, most likely will say going to meet her boyfriend.)
b) Where you get that ring from? (Could be gift from bf)

None of her answers lead to any indication of being attached.
On the flip side, she continues to show up near my department area, she absolutely has no reason to do that.
I know for a fact that when you like someone, you want to appear near the person as often as possible.

But other times, she is inconsistent in system chat behavior, made me feel like she is not interested.
I don't know man, the silence in system chat continues to this day, I was very busy with my work anyway, it helps me focus more and get more work done without dealing with her.
*
Good on the inaction part that made the progress ended. Although some girls (puiyi/cathryn) do not mind their partner's net worth is lesser than them. But the question is whether male willing to be beta or not, that's another topic we can discuss on another day.

Now back at your girl A. The way I see you emphasized on her frequent visit in your area, my POV is either she wanna bermakcik bawang with her girlfrens or just wanna attract your attention (since you are the only male in your dept which proves your perception right).

Does she has any close bestie in your dept? I find it unnecessary to always show up in your area considering her nature of work is secretary unless her boss's work is also linked with your dept.

Second, if I were you, fish her and be direct. Since you r bold enough to ask for ponytail, then just lightly tell her 'Shall we go for quick lunch one day? I hope your bf don't mind la'. Tbh, we women prefer direct and less small talk guy.

Also don't be discouraged by slow response on chat. I personally does not like chatting. Always ghosted every chat if I get the message or I find it boring/unrelated. I can judge you are more introvert (heavy relying on chat) while girl A is extrovert (her ignoring your chat and swing by at ur area). Perhaps, try to engage f2f conversation more often than texting. I know its hard but why not give it a try?

But then again, no point to go through all this if at the end of the day you only realize she is not single afterall.
dattebayo
post Jun 1 2022, 03:58 PM

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QUOTE(AshenOne @ May 31 2022, 09:40 PM)
Yep see first, things can change unexpectedly when you least expect it.
Back in my other Ex company I met a girl I considered as "out of league", she is desirable and super wealthy, her instagram all travelling photos with her family.

I only did WhatsApp her once in a while, greet her in office when we met, never once I thought she would invite me out 1 on 1 in some random day.
The date went really well, but I didn't push it to happy ending when she allows it, after that she didn't find me again, perhaps offended by my inaction.

That is one of the big thing I wish to find out, I checked her fingers as 1 of the forumer guided me, she doesn't have any ring in Ring finger.
I also tried to lead the texting conversation in a way for her to have plenty of chances to tell me if she is attached or not, such as:

a) Any plans for weekend? (If attached, most likely will say going to meet her boyfriend.)
b) Where you get that ring from? (Could be gift from bf)

None of her answers lead to any indication of being attached.
On the flip side, she continues to show up near my department area, she absolutely has no reason to do that.
I know for a fact that when you like someone, you want to appear near the person as often as possible.

But other times, she is inconsistent in system chat behavior, made me feel like she is not interested.
I don't know man, the silence in system chat continues to this day, I was very busy with my work anyway, it helps me focus more and get more work done without dealing with her.
*
what did you mean by "happy ending" ?
TSAshenOne
post Jun 1 2022, 09:36 PM

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QUOTE(Daprind @ Jun 1 2022, 10:40 AM)
Good on the inaction part that made the progress ended. Although some girls (puiyi/cathryn) do not mind their partner's net worth is lesser than them. But the question is whether male willing to be beta or not, that's another topic we can discuss on another day.

Now back at your girl A. The way I see you emphasized on her frequent visit in your area, my POV is either she wanna bermakcik bawang with her girlfrens or just wanna attract your attention (since you are the only male in your dept which proves your perception right).

Does she has any close bestie in your dept? I find it unnecessary to always show up in your area considering her nature of work is secretary unless her boss's work is also linked with your dept.

Second, if I were you, fish her and be direct. Since you r bold enough to ask for ponytail, then just lightly tell her 'Shall we go for quick lunch one day? I hope your bf don't mind la'. Tbh, we women prefer direct and less small talk guy.

Also don't be discouraged by slow response on chat. I personally does not like chatting. Always ghosted every chat if I get the message or I find it boring/unrelated. I can judge you are more introvert (heavy relying on chat) while girl A is extrovert (her ignoring your chat and swing by at ur area). Perhaps, try to engage f2f conversation more often than texting. I know its hard but why not give it a try?

But then again, no point to go through all this if at the end of the day you only realize she is not single afterall.
*
Being with wealthy girl means the guy will need to be beta? I can't seem to understand your quote but I believe money is the least concerning factor in wealthy people's mind, they already have money, they want to look for something else in their partner.

She does not know anyone in my own Dept.

I indirectly asked her to lunch with me by telling her a Food Court nearby has good food, it will be good if she join me. I didn't outright ask her to join me.
She told me she lazy travel to there just for food, so I take it as a gentle let down.
Maybe I try ask outright the next time I see her, if reject, I take it as not interested.


QUOTE(dattebayo @ Jun 1 2022, 03:58 PM)
what did you mean by "happy ending" ?
*
The same meaning when people say they want to get "happy ending" after massaging at hotel.
TSAshenOne
post Jun 3 2022, 06:10 PM

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I asked Girl A out yesterday, the reply I get is a no, but in a playful manner.
I don't know man, I feel like this isn't the end, maybe she need more time to get to know each other before getting comfortable enough, or she is just letting me down gently. In a way this put my mind at ease, no longer need to think about whether I can get her out or not. Any effort from now on will be casual, if it is meant to be, it will be.

I revived my connection with Girl D after my rejection from Girl A, things looking positive, expect an outing soon with her.

Going out with Girl E on weekend as usual.
K0MR4DE
post Jun 7 2022, 10:50 AM

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QUOTE(AshenOne @ Jun 3 2022, 06:10 PM)
I asked Girl A out yesterday, the reply I get is a no, but in a playful manner.
I don't know man, I feel like this isn't the end, maybe she need more time to get to know each other before getting comfortable enough, or she is just letting me down gently. In a way this put my mind at ease, no longer need to think about whether I can get her out or not. Any effort from now on will be casual, if it is meant to be, it will be.

I revived my connection with Girl D after my rejection from Girl A, things looking positive, expect an outing soon with her.

Going out with Girl E on weekend as usual.
*
Any update regarding Girl E?
TSAshenOne
post Jun 7 2022, 03:05 PM

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QUOTE(K0MR4DE @ Jun 7 2022, 10:50 AM)
Any update regarding Girl E?
*
Girl E always guaranteed to meet weekly, more activity arranged for next outing. One major pain point is cannot overnight, which means no trip, cannot go far away to eat better food, sight seeing, and more.
anndroid
post Jun 7 2022, 03:32 PM

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You just seem so desperate TS idk but for girls being so observant and desperate for a relationship is a turn off. I am the type who dont believe in trying out different people but believe in falling for the right person naturally and that right person will appear in your life when you least expected.

This post has been edited by anndroid: Jun 7 2022, 03:34 PM
TSAshenOne
post Jun 7 2022, 03:47 PM

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QUOTE(anndroid @ Jun 7 2022, 03:32 PM)
You just seem so desperate TS idk but for girls being so observant and desperate for a relationship is a turn off. I am the type who dont believe in trying out different people but believe in falling for the right person naturally and that right person will appear in your life when you least expected.
*
People actively trying to change their fate, to a certain extent.
You are saying you will leave everything completely to chance, what if that person never comes? That's the problem.

You take it when the cake is placed in front of you, or you go to many places just to see if there is any cake for you to take, that's the difference being desperate or not.
TSAshenOne
post Jun 15 2022, 10:56 PM

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Update:

Girl A - Just normal chats and greetings when met each other, nothing much going on, noticed her right hand index finger has a ring, if I am not mistaken this means she is in a relationship? I haven't ask about the ring yet, thinking of an excuse, maybe "nice ring you have there, where you get it from?", you guys can give me some suggestions to bait her to tell me the origin of the ring without being too obvious of trying to test her relationship status.

Girl B - Getting closer and closer each day, now we have more frequent physical contacts and inside jokes, she would chat me up in system chat very often too. I have a feeling one day we are going to cross the line and don't know what to do about it.

Girl C - permanent lost cause

Girl D - To meet in a week's time.

Girl E - Getting closer after each weekly outing, can notice she is already warmed up to me, got more physical contacts than before, I think the time for holding hands will be not far away. Claim her as GF is within sight.

Girl F (new) - To meet next week, matched randomly in FB, her photos all showing her big assets / cleavages, overall sexy pics, and in her social media loves to show her texts with other guys, and gifts from other guys. I still have many days before meeting her, she is a bad texter that will end the loop without follow up, making me scratch my head to come up with interesting topic to keep the text going, maybe I should stop texting altogether and just meet her on that day itself and do face to face interactions. Any tips how to deal with this kind of girl?

This post has been edited by AshenOne: Jun 15 2022, 10:57 PM
achong09
post Jun 20 2022, 09:41 AM

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QUOTE(AshenOne @ May 19 2022, 10:17 PM)
It's a continuation of topic from << https://forum.lowyat.net/topic/5263216 >>

Gave it some time, things are looking good now, I blend in nicely with my group now, however I have a few situations I might need some opinions:
Case A:
I have been noticing a girl from other department (secretary side if not mistaken) come to my department from time to time.
Of all the places, she chose to be near my presence, and I catch her eye contact a few times.
I did initiate conversation with her as I think she's cute, I commented I'd like to see her putting up ponytail someday, and she did it the other day.

After work, I was expecting to walk alone in the long lobby towards the car park, she would catch me and walk together, a few times as of now.

Problem to solve:
I don't know if she's attached, and can't be sure enough if she has any feels for me, but outlook is optimistic.
I am thinking my next step would be to get her office chat contact, I know her name, but unable to find her in system to start chatting online.
Case B:
One of the girls for some reason likes to talk to me, just about anything. She also revealed she currently has a bf when she was telling me one of her stories.
However, she likes to chat with me in the system, looking forward to my lame jokes, and even send me gifts sometimes.

Problem to solve:
What's her problem?
Case C:
I met one girl from other department during the course of my work, one day she asked me out for lunch, we talked a lot along the way.
During lunch, one of the topics I touched on was how our peers are getting married and having kids.
After lunch I tried to ask her out during weekend using system chat, she didn't respond. However when we met each other in office, we would greet each other as if nothing happened.

Problem to solve:
Was it my problem to talk about marriage? Does it make me seem desperate and scared her away? Is it a good idea to avoid this altogether next time?
I did not communicate that I am in a rush to marry, I am merely discussing the happenings around me related to marriage, and also asked what's her plan in regards to marriage, what is the ideal age, etc.
Case D:
There was a cute girl in canteen always taking orders from customer, I am her long-standing customer, I go to her every day until she remembered me and my habits.
Right before she resigned, I asked for her number, one of her female colleague saw me in action.
After work that day obviously I am going to text her, her responses in texting are quite different in real life, she's really passionate and energetic in real life, while not quite able to keep the texting flow going.
At this point I don't know how to continue texting her anymore, I take it as "not meant to be" if texting feels like a chore.

Problem to solve:
Any tips to revive the texts? Or more importantly, will my action of trying to hit on this girl in the canteen spread like wildfire in the office? I am worried people knew what I've done and it will look bad on me if I switch target in office.
Case E (unrelated to office):
Added her in FB, she's quite the bad texter, eventually I gave up, but then she would re-initiate text with me from time to time.
One day she just directly ask me out, I agreed. We had a bit of awkward time together because everyday is full house and long queue, end up going into mall. still got some queue but bearable.
At this point about 3 dates already, next date going for badminton.

Problem to solve:
I can't figure out why she would auto come back to me after I let her go by not responding, twice? She looks decent, and seem like a conservative girl with no experience to me.
Best guess is she don't have pools to choose from, she helps to run her family business, unable to expand social circle, and it happened I am the only one trying to hit on her last time, and she came back for me.
I am a bit clueless on how to progress with such a person, she has 5 brothers, I am a bit worried if I mess things up, 5 of them will gang on me, lols.
*
Bro, your office got vacancy ka?? i want to apply leh... hehehe

K0MR4DE
post Jun 20 2022, 09:59 AM

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5 days already, any update TS? Interested to know about Girl B and Girl E update. Girl A feels macam bad news incoming? Or is it because she bought the ring due to the cheap gold price..

In the Malay realm, walao this is the time they bought an engagement + wedding ring for their GF soon to be Fiance, soon to be wifey..
TSAshenOne
post Jun 20 2022, 10:28 PM

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QUOTE(achong09 @ Jun 20 2022, 09:41 AM)
Bro, your office got vacancy ka?? i want to apply leh... hehehe
*
What did you study? Not sure if there are vacancies for your role.

QUOTE(K0MR4DE @ Jun 20 2022, 09:59 AM)
5 days already, any update TS? Interested to know about Girl B and Girl E update. Girl A feels macam bad news incoming? Or is it because she bought the ring due to the cheap gold price..

In the Malay realm, walao this is the time they bought an engagement + wedding ring for their GF soon to be Fiance, soon to be wifey..
*
Girl A - Still trying to figure out if she is just playing hard to get, or unavailable and not interested. Need some time.

Girl B - Usual, expect things to stay the way it is now for the foreseeable future, until some catalyst disrupt the status quo and made her cross the line, I for sure do not want to be the one to cross it first.

Girl E - Didn't have the energy to meet her during the weekend, needed more Me Time. She made some foods for me and drove to my place to give it to me.

Girl F - Met tonight, face looked so so without the cam filter, but wow I never seen such big balloons before, it was hard keeping a straight face and look at her eyes instead of somewhere else. We both got quite a lot of physical contacts, things went pretty well, and scheduled again same time next week. Claim as GF within sight too.

Not just Malay, my Chinese realm getting married here and there too, those married for some time all their stories are about their babies.
Meanwhile, I still want to grind more, I do not want a poor life after marriage.
Also, dating a few girls at the same time, I am starting to feel the impact to my wallet, it hinders my grinding progress a bit, maybe I need to think a way to reduce my spending with them.
Ideally I just focus on one, preferably Girl A, and be done with it.
TSAshenOne
post Jun 21 2022, 09:54 PM

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I'm so fking done with my luck, I saw Girl A holding hands with a guy nearby office after work, no wonder why I just feel like I cannot make further progress beyond friends. I should have known if I am having doubts, I am foolish to not follow my own rule, there is a rule says the girl would not want to give you the wrong idea if she has feelings for you, she will make it easy for you, not harder, even if they are playing hard to get, they do it in a fun way rather than you feel like being stone walled.

So Girl A, lost cause.

But found Girl G, she is in my own department, and I never consider her before due to this. Recently I can sense she is staring at me in a dreamy way when we are talking, before that I cracked lots of jokes that made her day, several times, probably this is what leads to this result. She is real hot too, but as usual I am unsure if she is single, need some time, some way to find out.
K0MR4DE
post Jun 22 2022, 11:11 AM

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QUOTE(AshenOne @ Jun 21 2022, 09:54 PM)
I'm so fking done with my luck, I saw Girl A holding hands with a guy nearby office after work, no wonder why I just feel like I cannot make further progress beyond friends. I should have known if I am having doubts, I am foolish to not follow my own rule, there is a rule says the girl would not want to give you the wrong idea if she has feelings for you, she will make it easy for you, not harder, even if they are playing hard to get, they do it in a fun way rather than you feel like being stone walled.

So Girl A, lost cause.

But found Girl G, she is in my own department, and I never consider her before due to this. Recently I can sense she is staring at me in a dreamy way when we are talking, before that I cracked lots of jokes that made her day, several times, probably this is what leads to this result. She is real hot too, but as usual I am unsure if she is single, need some time, some way to find out.
*
I knew it Girl A bad news incoming one! I innocently thought that she wore the ring for accessories only, since Chinese? If I saw Malay girl has a ring on the finger, straight away lari liao is not worth it to kacau other people relationship / trying to entertain her "friendliness". Haiyaa! Just focus on Girl B and Girl E lah at the moment. Both of them look like promising candidates! Do Girl B / Girl F has made you something like Girl E and deliver it to you too? In relation to my personal experience, if a girl made you homemade food means she kinda like-like you since no woman would want to spend their time in the kitchen preparing something without a reason..

Also want to break my news, this weekend my girl also invited me to her house one for a homemade cook lunch rclxm9.gif
Femsroot P
post Jun 23 2022, 06:22 PM

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u sound like a perasan guy. ppl talk to u abit u think ppl like u. ppl touch u, u naik bendera. get a life la.

be a principled man and only go for the girl that u like the most. not every cat passby aso u fatt hao. OMG i really kenot read ur stories.

puke.gif
TSAshenOne
post Jun 23 2022, 10:22 PM

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QUOTE(K0MR4DE @ Jun 22 2022, 11:11 AM)
I knew it Girl A bad news incoming one! I innocently thought that she wore the ring for accessories only, since Chinese? If I saw Malay girl has a ring on the finger, straight away lari liao is not worth it to kacau other people relationship / trying to entertain her "friendliness". Haiyaa! Just focus on Girl B and Girl E lah at the moment. Both of them look like promising candidates! Do Girl B / Girl F has made you something like Girl E and deliver it to you too? In relation to my personal experience, if a girl made you homemade food means she kinda like-like you since no woman would want to spend their time in the kitchen preparing something without a reason..

Also want to break my news, this weekend my girl also invited me to her house one for a homemade cook lunch  rclxm9.gif
*
Happy for you, that's progress right there being invited to her house.
I had many girls made food for me in the past, I don't feel anything anymore, it's all the same cycle, feels like Deja Vu all over again.
The cycle goes like this: girl like me > start dating > make food for me > eventually infatuation run out > things started to go downhill > go separate ways.
So when a girl make food for me, it just reminds me of the cycles, and won't feel good nor bad, just numbness.

I don't know how many more cycles I need to go through, judging my terrible luck, it could be forever.
But, I am just going to keep trying, move on with life, take what life has to offer to me, go along with the motion.

QUOTE(Femsroot @ Jun 23 2022, 06:22 PM)
u sound like a perasan guy. ppl talk to u abit u think ppl like u. ppl touch u, u naik bendera. get a life la.

be a principled man and only go for the girl that u like the most. not every cat passby aso u fatt hao. OMG i really kenot read ur stories.

puke.gif
*
Principle led me to nowhere, and you can just avoid clicking my thread if you are so against it, I am sorry.

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