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> Gf is stressed because of me (Serious)

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dudester
post Jan 11 2022, 04:53 PM

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when a woman behave like this , she wants more from you , as in last chance she's walking out to someone else soon.
Tsukasa
post Jan 11 2022, 04:57 PM

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Easy. b4 marraige. Rent a room together and live together for 1 year. Improve what u think is bad. I dont think she is perfect also. if got perfect girl. I cut.

Then take the next step from there.

Trial first b4 dotting pen. That one too late liao. Esp when u have baby. Gg man. Pity the baby then.
MangO
post Jan 15 2022, 12:08 AM

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Its very easy to say that you are clumsy and forgetful. Assuming its not medical in nature then you can make improvements. Create a system to reduce the occurrences. It takes tremendous effort to improve your self but you need to make the first step everyday.

She might have found it cute in the beginning and giggle when you forget, but if you keen on forgetting things its bound to cause an issue in the relationship.

What is your value proposition to compensate for your flaws that will allow the girl to overlook them? If you have no winning proposition (money, looks, charm, fame) what is there to stop her from considering other suitors.

You are the prize and if she feels like she is getting short changed then you either improve yourself or move on. At the current situation she no longer respect you or views you as someone she can admire.
Blofeld
post Jan 15 2022, 01:34 AM

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i would also find it annoying to have someone forget to do this and that
keong_boy
post Jan 15 2022, 01:44 AM

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Just because you've dated for so so of years, it doesn't meant she or he is the right one. Better discover those difficult questions that will lead to arguments now rather than getting married and realizing that that questions matter but was ignored. Good you've both realize it. Better hurt now than hurt later with kids.
technosakai
post Jan 17 2022, 01:44 PM

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Simple things like this shouldn't even happen in the first place?
Cooking noodles too hard and not edible. Bro, you can always just take the chopsticks to fish some out of the water, press it a bit or chew on it to test the texture. Whether is it just nice al dente or still sibeh hard to even eat.

Forgetful and clumsiness? make it a habit la to always touch your pockets before you leave the house.

if your phone and wallets are always in your left and right pockets, then before you leave the house and get into the car, have a habit of touching your pockets.

simple habit ni ma. Touch left and right, got phone and wallet.. chun. Can go dating dy. Special case if got special item need to bring along, then you need to develop this habit of mental checklist in your head.

Oh today need to bring this and this to this place.. before you leave the house, 'today i need to do this, so i need to bring this and this. Oh got them in the car already. check both'. Touch pockets, got phone and wallet. Chun can leave the house.. These are simple habits in life bro. Nothing to do with clumsiness. Its either you're very laidback and carefree person and she's sick and tired of your attitude

or she's facing difficulty at work then she got nobody to rant to so she exploded them onto you. Try talking to her whether is there anything bothering her, whether is it family or work. If she opens up, then maybe it's not really your forgetfulness or clumsiness being the main issue here, but still you gotta fix that shit man. It's annoying. Easy fix only.

Otherwise, really stick a note at the door and read it before you leave the house

This post has been edited by technosakai: Jan 17 2022, 01:45 PM
InitialB
post Jan 17 2022, 01:47 PM

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QUOTE(Nutbeater69 @ Jan 10 2022, 04:07 AM)
My relationship is about 6 years I have always been a clumsy guy and probably do things without thinking hard.

Lately I realise my girlfriend keep throwing these kind of tantrum at me.

Sometimes I might fucked small things up and she got super mad on how a person can screw things up.

For example,

I left my wallet when we go dating and I had to drive back home to pick up my stuffs (wasted time)

I cook noodles and it was way too hard for both of us to eat and she got mad

Recently she told me she sick of my clumsy attitude and told me she very stressed to live with me.. and our argument will be more frequent if we decided to move out to live together with me permanently when we got married

Every time she mentioned this, our future looks bleaker and I’m trying hard to not be clumsy but each time I fucked up, she got mad. I felt like I’m stepping a floor of glass
*
You're a douchebag...

Simple thing you make mistakes (Sometimes is ok. But often... is your personal problem)

What is wrong with you?
john123x
post Jan 17 2022, 01:51 PM

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QUOTE(Nutbeater69 @ Jan 10 2022, 04:07 AM)
I left my wallet when we go dating and I had to drive back home to pick up my stuffs (wasted time)
*
this one really crossing the line.....
how on earth you can forget your wallet before you go out?

its part of an adult's SOP
john123x
post Jan 17 2022, 01:53 PM

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QUOTE(technosakai @ Jan 17 2022, 01:44 PM)
Simple things like this shouldn't even happen in the first place?
Cooking noodles too hard and not edible. Bro, you can always just take the chopsticks to fish some out of the water, press it a bit or chew on it to test the texture. Whether is it just nice al dente or still sibeh hard to even eat.

Forgetful and clumsiness? make it a habit la to always touch your pockets before you leave the house.

if your phone and wallets are always in your left and right pockets, then before you leave the house and get into the car, have a habit of touching your pockets.

simple habit ni ma. Touch left and right, got phone and wallet.. chun. Can go dating dy. Special case if got special item need to bring along, then you need to develop this habit of mental checklist in your head.

Oh today need to bring this and this to this place.. before you leave the house, 'today i need to do this, so i need to bring this and this. Oh got them in the car already. check both'. Touch pockets, got phone and wallet. Chun can leave the house.. These are simple habits in life bro. Nothing to do with clumsiness. Its either you're very laidback and carefree person and she's sick and tired of your attitude

or she's facing difficulty at work then she got nobody to rant to so she exploded them onto you. Try talking to her whether is there anything bothering her, whether is it family or work. If she opens up, then maybe it's not really your forgetfulness or clumsiness being the main issue here, but still you gotta fix that shit man. It's annoying. Easy fix only.

Otherwise, really stick a note at the door and read it before you leave the house
*
wow, its like you able to read my mind. I myself also developed this method myself without anyone's input.
technosakai
post Jan 19 2022, 12:09 PM

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QUOTE(john123x @ Jan 17 2022, 01:53 PM)
wow, its like you able to read my mind. I myself also developed this method myself without anyone's input.
*
basic thing to do for adult or teenager.
developed this habit since young.
always check before leaving any place. also, if outside, always check the seats whether got leave anything behind. .easy
technosakai
post Jan 19 2022, 03:08 PM

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QUOTE(Nutbeater69 @ Jan 11 2022, 01:55 PM)
Thanks for the advise ! Im trying to be better. We are almost 24/7 together so it’s impossible she has a backup unless got a secret phone tongue.gif

Sometimes when she got mad of my clumsiness, I got mad at her for being angry and somehow I made her felt like it’s her fault for being angry.

I think I need to change myself for the better
*
Bro 1 thing that I would like to point out and you to explain is how is your lifestyle with her?
What is your role in the house?

Since you say that you are together with her almost 24/7, so I'm assuming that you guys stay together. Maybe in a rented room, apartment, studio unit, etc.. whatever la.
But what is your role in this house. Do you help with house chores? Simple tasks like sweep the floor, cleaning toilet, laundry, taking care of things in the house..

sometimes simple things within the house not taken care of could also be a triggering point.
For example, like my brother, he doesn't help out in the house, its fine, but don't cause more mess than it needs to be.
after using a cup, make sure to wash it, don't leave it lying around for hours.

After washing machine is done, help out to take out the washed clothes and hang them for drying.

Is there any change of habits from your side in these 6 years of relationships?
It could be these 'small small' actions or things that may have caused the build up she have inside her, to explode on you. So no matter what small issues (left wallet, cook noodles too hard), also could have triggered her.
in her perspective, could be 'walao, already no help out in the house, yet simple thing like cooking noodles can go wrong' - then she explode and get mad, then you make it like it's her fault for getting mad
but come on bro, i mean how can you even mess up noodles? It can only go too soft, how can you even cook noodles too hard to eat still baffles me.

but like I said, think about it, about your role in the place you guys are staying in. You helping out or not? whether she's basically doing all the things I've mentioned and you're basically sitting in the house just on your ass most of the time.

Only you can help yourself out in the relationship. No matter what advice you get here.

Also, don't take her for granted like 1 bro mentioned, a gf is still gf, don't think just because she's with you for 6 years, you can play a game first, then delay her date or the time to leave the house. This can also be a contributing factor on why she's mad at you.

 

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